Page 88 of Free to Judge

“Yeah. She knows everything.”

“And she didn’t walk?” Now the voice sounds incredulous.

“No.” Then I think about our conversation this morning and swear. “I don’t know.”

“She think you walked away from the mission?”

I look out my windshield, heart aching.

“I told her I’d be back when this is all done.”

“Well, aren’t you the dumb little shit,” the voice I haven’t heard in years lectures me, much like he used to when I’d get caught raiding his wife’s flower bed for Mother’s Day flowers for my ma.

“She’s Jack Marshall’s granddaughter,” I explain, as if that says it all.

“So? Right now, you’re technically a criminal.”

“Gee, thanks, Holder,” I snarl.

“Keeping it real, Dec. Why’d you fuck it up so bad?”

“She’s perfect.”

“The problem being?” Ace waits for my answer.

“What if I can’t protect her? What if I can’t stop what Jack keeps threatening? If I walk away, maybe that’s another way to keep her out of it.” Then I hasten to add, “Not that it means I’ll stop protecting her. I’ll just do it from the shadows.”

Holder’s voice softens just slightly. “You’re in deeper than I’ve seen you before.”

“She’s the one.”

Another pause. Then he informs me, “The intel checked out. We’ll move on the club tonight. Quietly. We’ll get the girls out.”

“And me?”

“You’re out. Get to Hudson and wait for debrief. Jack’s going to try to retaliate.”

My grip tightens on the steering wheel turning my knuckles white. “I need to keep Jack away from Kalie.”

“Then focus on that.” He rolls down his window, and for the first time in years, I see Holder’s full face. The pride on it is unmistakable. “You did it, Dec. You swore you’d pick up the lead after Tanya was killed. You found out what she did and you likely just found her killer.”

“Let’s confirm that before we celebrate.”

“When we do, we’re reinstating every fucking accolade you had Hudson delete from your file.” Before I can protest, he holds up a hand. “This time, I refuse to give in to you. Great job.”

A minute later, his SUV rolls away.

I sit in silence long after Holder’s taillights vanish. I think of Nerissa, of Chrissi’s blood on the carpet. I recall the way Tanya’s head was delivered to the office—each piece of skin pulled from her face. Of Jack Marshall’s talent with a knife and his remarks about loyalty.

“This was for you, Tanya. Now it’s time to reclaim my future.” With that, I turn on my engine and head back toward the Hudson office to finish what I started.

CHAPTER FORTY-TWO

Even if I’mnot one of the people damned by circumstance who run in Brave Steps, it’s taking everything inside me to put one foot in front of the other after that photo came up on my newsfeed. On several newsfeeds. All I wanted to do was crawl into bed and feed off the pain, but I know what I’d share with the others—reclaim your sense of self.

Still, I can’t help but recall the words he left me with this morning as he was trying to sneak out of my bed—nothing but sweet little lies. At least I know them for what they are now. Anguish fuels my muscles as each footfall lands.

He told me it was a business meeting. He said it right there in my bedroom. Lied right to my face. “Kalie, I have a meeting?—”