Page 77 of Free to Judge

Aunt Cass:

I’m not going without because you can’t follow directions. That’s where I draw the line.

Aunt Em:

Don’t make me spit on you on purpose.

Aunt Cori:

It’s either that or the women are eating somewhere else—in protest.

Uncle Phil:

RED ALERT! JASON! HELP!

Aunt Cass:

Don’t know why you bother asking for Jason to intervene. You know he doesn’t respond to these texts.

Nic:

Don’t worry, I’ve already placed everyone’s take-home orders from the bakery.

Mama:

You can forget mine. Keene doesn’t deserve anything that tastes good.

Kalie:

Mama, are you still punishing Dad?

Aunt Cori:

Oh, the places I can take that comment.

Uncle Phil:

I want to escape this chat. La, la, la.

Aunt Em:

We can make that happen, Phil.

Aunt Cass:

Be careful what you wish for, brother.

Uncle Phil:

I’ll take Keene’s portion of goodies as therapy, Nic.

Kalie:

Now, now, Uncle Phil, don’t be rude. We have guests coming.

So, I claim dibs on Grace’s portion.

Uncle Phil: