Page 128 of Eryx
I explained the situation, telling them of the king’s fever.
“What do you propose?” another commander asked.
“The army shall remain here in Torone to hold the city, while a small unit transports the king back to Aphytis,” I said.
One of the advisors curled his lip and stepped forward. “Do you think it wise to carry him for travel when he is so ill?”
“He is in need of a physician, and there are none within our ranks,” I responded, squaring my jaw. “Only a fool would trust a healer from the city we just captured to aid the king of the army that conquered them.”
The commanders nodded their agreement. Since I wasn’t an officer, they had to ultimately approve my plan before we could act on it. Fortunately, they saw it was the best option and allowed me to gather a small force of men. After making the arrangements, I returned to the king’s side.
“Thank you,” Axios said, not meeting my gaze, as if ashamed. The king had fallen asleep, still holding his hand. “I know this isn’t easy for you, but you have my gratitude.”
I thought of Paris and Galen then. Of how they had been in love, were torn apart, and then came back together but in a new way. My actions years ago had pushed Axios away from me and into another man’s arms. The king adored him as well, their connection not weakening although years had passed.
The thought of sharing Axios with anyone filled me with a deadly rage. Yet... my love for him conflicted with that anger. Perhaps, like Galen, I had to embrace the change and learn to live with it.
“We have a long journey,” I said, standing from the tile floor.
Axios nodded, a tear falling from his eye.
During the journey, Axios cared for the king. He doctored his shoulder wound and placed wet cloths on the king’s forehead in an attempt to battle his fever. When Agesipolis shook with chills, Axios removed his cloak and tucked it around him.
Questions burned inside me. I had vowed to never ask of their time together, but witnessing Axios care for the king with such tenderness had weakened my resolve.
By the time we reached Aphytis, the king’s condition had not improved. He was taken to the physician’s chamber, and with nothing more we could do, we went to our quarters to rest.
***
“May I be so bold as to ask you a question?” I asked, lying beside Axios on the bed we shared. I smoothed my fingers across his bare stomach.
He turned his head toward me and nodded.
“What is it about him that captures your affection? You have reassured me that you did not lie with him during the day you spent in his presence. Yet, instead of easing my mind, it only makes me more curious… only makes me wonder what occurred between you two for you to still think of him with such fondness, even all these years later.”
“Is this a thing you truly wish to know?” he asked, hesitance showing in his eyes.
His behavior made me second-guess myself. If he was worried about me knowing, then the truth would definitely hurt me.
“I’d rather shove blades into my ears to keep from hearing it, but… I need to,” I said, feeling as though my heart would burst from my chest any moment. I had never dreaded something so much. “I have been able to push it from my mind over the years, but seeing you care for him with such tenderness during our travels, I cannot rest until I know the truth. All of it.”
Axios carefully studied me, still unsure. Then, he began his story of the day they’d met. “I had just finished fighting with Gaius when I saw Agesipolis watching me from the edge of the training arena. He greeted me and commended me for my fortitude on the field.”
“Then he asked you to walk with him?” I asked.
“Yes,” he said, tracing designs on the top of my hand. “Agis told me of his life as we strolled along the path, and I did the same. Talking to him was effortless and the conversation never dulled. Many of his philosophies about life and war resembled mine, and he made me feel…” He trailed off as he searched for the right word. “Valid. Being with him was the first time I ever felt like I belonged, Ery.”
The breath left my lungs as an invisible dagger plunged into my heart. “You never felt you belonged with me?”
His honey eyes flashed to mine. “No, that’s not what I meant. I only meant to say that… you’ve always had a warrior’s mindset, ever since we were boys. And while you did your best to understand me, there were times when you couldn’t. I never felt like I belonged in Sparta. I was too weak, too tender-hearted. But hearing Agis, a king of Sparta, share my same views validated my beliefs. He made me feel worthy of being a Spartan.”
Gods, how the truth hurt.
The king had given Axios what I never could; a sense of belonging.
“What happened next?” I asked, trailing my hand along his chest.
“He took me to his home,” Axios answered, and he grew suddenly awkward. “The courtyard was stunning. He had a beautiful garden and many types of trees. When he caught me staring at the fig tree, he plucked one and offered it to me.”
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