Page 18 of Demon Dating Service
The door opened to absolute pitch blackness. Luke’s long, tired sigh cut across the foyer, and Tog could hear him shuffling bags and other things in his arms as he fumbled for the light switch near the front door.
A dim light flicked on, and Tog leaped out from his hiding spot. He towered nearly nine feet in the air, covered in black fur. His gaping mouth had rows of teeth that would make a great white shark jealous and massive talons, as sharp as razors, tipped hands bigger than Luke’s head. Half a dozen tentacles sprouted from his back and waved wildly in the air, while three bright-red eyes stared at Luke’s face. He was the stuff of nightmares. He was death and destruction. He was?—
Luke chuckled and shook his head wearily. “That’s gotta be Tog.”
The demon froze. This made no sense. Why was Luke laughing at him? It was terrified laughing, right? Luke was so frightened that his brain had broken, and that was why he was laughing.
“Man, how did you know I needed cheering up?” Luke smirked as he tilted his head left and then right, inspecting his appearance. “That is a killer costume. You’re gonna have to show me how you made it. You are going to scare people shitless this Halloween.”
Costume?
“But not you?” Tog asked softly.
“Nah, I love all things horror and scary. Most of it makes me laugh.” Luke turned away from him and used his foot to kick the front door closed. Tog’s shoulders slumped. All his planning. This was his scariest creation yet, and Luke laughed at him. How could he call himself a demon if he couldn’t scare this one little human?
“Hey, I had a really shitty day. I picked up a large pizza with everything and a sack of super-hot wings. You wanna eat junk food and laugh at a scary movie with me?”
Tog’s head popped up again. “Hot wings? How hot are we talking?”
Luke grinned. “These are from Baby Ray’s. His atomic wings. Light your asshole on fire. Think you can handle them?”
“I haven’t met a hot wing I couldn’t handle.”
Another low chuckle escaped Luke. “Cool. How about you get out of the costume and grab us a couple of drinks out of the fridge? I’ll find a movie to watch.”
And just like that, Tog’s disappointment disappeared, as if the tiny human had cast a magic spell. While Luke shuffled off to the family room, where the massive TV and soft sectional sofa rested, Tog changed into the human form Luke was accustomed to seeing. He hurried off to the kitchen, where he grabbed a pair of cold sodas and an entire roll of paper towels.
When he joined Luke, the smell of greasy pizza and spicy hot wings filled the air. Luke had left the lights turned off, so the massive room was lit by the glow of the TV.
“Hope you don’t mind the dark,” Luke said as Tog eased his large girth onto the cushions. “I feel like horror movies can’t be fully appreciated with the lights on.”
“I agree.” Tog set one of the drinks in front of Luke and snagged a large slice of pizza loaded with toppings. He practically shoveled the entire thing into his mouth in a single bite. Good pizza.
“This one is an old favorite. The special effects aren’t as good, but the humans are so fucking stupid in this one. It’s like the killer doesn’t even have to try.”
Tog sort of stared at Luke with his mouth hanging open as he was about to shove the last of his slice in. Luke enjoyed watching the stupid humans get killed by the masked murderer? How could they have gotten so lucky to have found such an interesting human? Nothing scared him, he liked spicy food, and he thought horror movies were funny!
The movie rolled and Tog relaxed in the blackness, watching the killer pop up in shadowy places and cut down the stupidhuman teenagers in interesting ways. Blood sprayed and Luke shouted at the TV, mocking and laughing at the humans between bites of food. For all their boasting, the atomic wings proved to be more than either of them could handle. They were both sweating and reaching for their drinks after a few, but the pizza helped to wash away some of the heat.
“So, why did you have such a shitty day?” Tog inquired during a lull in the killing.
“Oh. That.” Luke slumped even lower on the sofa so that his chin was resting on his chest. “Just a bunch of stupid shit seemed to pile up today. One of the night managers at Burger Hut likes to give me grief and make fun of me because I’m a grad student stuck working at a fast-food joint to make ends meet. He thinks I’m a dumbass for wasting my time and money on my major. He’s one of those people who believes that the only thing that matters in the world is making a shit-ton of money. It doesn’t matter that I love what I do. All he thinks about is that he’s got a high school degree, and he’s making more money than me. He likes to make my life hell.”
“Ah.” Tog thought for a moment. He had spent an enjoyable evening laughing at a movie and eating the delicious food that Luke had brought home. He needed to repay him. “Would you like me to give this manager explosive diarrhea?”
Luke, unfortunately, had been taking a drink. The beverage sprayed out of his mouth, followed by several seconds of choking. Thankfully, Luke started laughing when he could breathe again. “Fuck! That would be so awesome. That would show Rick.”
Excellent. Tog would find this Rick and give him explosive diarrhea.
“Did you have any other problems today?”
The happiness drained out of Luke, and he slouched even lower on the couch. “Yeah. It’s stupid.”
Tog waited, but Luke didn’t continue, so he prodded him. “Was it work?”
“Nah. School. There are these undergrad idiots. Probably frat brats. They keep making fun of me and spreading these rumors because I talk to the crows who visit me. They were making fun of me today, and when I went to leave, I spilled my smoothie all down the front of me. And of course it was right in front of Matteo.”
“And Matteo is one of these idiots?”