Page 24 of Cove City, Volume II

The smell of a foul fume caressed my nose. My eyes opened to the trash-filled bando. It reeked of unwashed body odor as random muhfuckas lay around strung out. A flicking sound ripped back-to-back, followed by the sucking of air. When I turned, her O-shaped mouth was wrapped around a glass dick. She sucked on that bitch, inhaling any little piece of residue left in it. Once the high hit, her arms fell to her side as a smile eased on her face. She turned to me, blinking slowly. Disgust filled me as I watched my mother take a trip to the moon.

Flashbacks came of being in a one-bedroom apartment, trapped in the room, as she got high constantly. Curled in the corner, praying for the superhero to come through the door to rescue me. I prayed that every time she got high, it would be her last trip to the moon until those trips got more frequent. Then that prayer turned into her staying on the moon, rotting away, being stuck in a place she was so happy to be.

My face began getting hot, my hands balled into fists, and I snapped.

Whap! Whap!

I hit her.

“I fucking hate you!.

“I shouted.

“Bitch you want to be on the moon!”

Whap! Whap!

My mother was so high she barely defended herself. I was in rage. I got the short end of the stick. For every time she chose the moon over me, I hit her. For every nigga she chose over me, I hit her again. For every destructive path I chose, I hit her again.

One of the baseheads tried pulling me off and I swung their ass back. I don’t even know why I came here. It was the little piece of hope I had left in me that maybe if she saw me down and out, she would care; she would comfort me. Instead, she chose the moon as she had done so many times before. I had to be forced to face the truth that my life was fucked up and there was no changing it. My mother was fucked up and so was I. I knew that my hiding was only going to last so long before I met my fucking demise, and I couldn’t even tell her because she would much rather be on the fucking moon.

I stood up and glanced around. I eyed every person lying there, giving their life to something that crippled them. I wondered how many of them had kids out there just like me. It hurt so bad watching them like this. As my eyes traveled through the room, I spotted someone, Sasha’s mother. She stared at me oddly. Her eyes were glassy, and her arms were down by her sides. Her lips were dry and almost blue, and that’s when I realized she was dead. I shook my head as I glanced down at my mother. I caught the tear that slipped.

“Nope, I’m not crying over you. You don’t deserve it. I hope you rot in this muhfucka. I hope you die on the fucking moon!.

“I shouted.

I heard the door to the bando open, and my head shot toward the hall. I quickly moved through and sat between two people who smelled like shit. I tossed my hood on and leaned to the side just as they were, trying to fit in. What I didn’t need was to be caught. Pierre knew where he could find my mother and the last thing I needed was to die on the moon with her.

I peeked through the side of my hoodie and couldn’t believe my fucking eyes. I watched him come in, glancing around until his eyes landed on my mother. He squatted down in front of her.

“Birdie, someone got the best of you, I see. It was only a matter of time.”

Fuck did he want with my mother? He stuck his hand in his pocket and pulled something out, but I didn’t know what the hell it was.

“I don’t know what he saw in you. For years, I’ve tried to figure out what it was that made him choose you,.

“he said to her as he was fiddling with something.

What in the hell was he talking about.

“I tried warning Best that you were no good. Hell, I tried warning my mother, but the bitch wouldn’t listen. Birdie, you and that nigga James destroyed a good thing. My life has never been the same. Does that son of yours know? Huh?.

“he asked her.

She had finally lifted. She scratched her neck as fear struck in her eyes. She tried to crawl back, but there was no room to move. I slowly removed my hood as my brain began to tap in on what the fuck the nigga was saying. My mother’s eyes landed on mine. “I-I,.

“she started, then began mumbling shit, I didn’t know what the hell she was saying.

“You were so selfish, you didn’t even tell your sister. You were so fucked up, you gave that boy your maiden name. He’s an Avery and doesn’t even know it. Birdie, the day you decided to fuck my father was the day I knew you and him weren’t shit. Best deserves a better sister, hell, she doesn’t need you,.

“he said as he gripped her arm, pulling it out.

Was this nigga saying what I thought he was? My eyes never wavered from my mother as her crusted mouth moved slowly. Sorry.

I didn’t care about her, sorry. I was a fucking Avery; I was Bishop’s fucking uncle. My father was Naheem’s dead fucking daddy, a rich nigga at that, and this is what she chose for me. It would forever be fuck her. Naheem slowly stuck the needle in her arm and emptied the syringe. Her eyes fluttered, and for a minute, I became enraged because he had only sent her to the moon. Suddenly, her body jumped, jerked, then seized up. Before I knew it, her eyes landed back on me as she sucked in her last breath. I flicked my hood back on as Naheem stood and walked out of the room, disappearing in the hall.

I couldn’t believe my life was hidden by the moon. I stood and walked over toward her.

“I hope you're happy on the moon, Ma,.

“I said as I left her in her happy place.

She was forced to face her truth while I was forced to listen. If I didn’t make it through this life, I just hoped that the next one would be better.

SASHA

Zaria called me and told me the guys were on their way back from New York. She explained that Dio was okay. She said he would need some therapy and a few doctor’s visits, but he was doing well, which made me happy. I didn’t know what this was about to look like for Zeus and me, and I was fucking scared.

I slid my visor down on my face before revving up my bike. Today was the day the guys and I had decided to ride.

“Y’all ready?”

“I’m re-re-read- ready,.

“Peanut stuttered.

Monfua pulled up on the other side of me, “Tatou o!.

“He yelled.

I took off with them behind me. Streets had come to visit for the day, since he didn’t have practice, to join us.

“Ayo, Sash, slow down, nigga. You know I got to keep this shit safe. These legs and arms are made for the court.”

“Well nigga you should have stayed your ass at school,.

“Mali jumped in.

I could hear them all chuckling in my helmet, but my mind was somewhere else. I swerved my bike, dipping and hitting the corner.

“Sash, you good?.

“Beans’s deep voice tapped in.

“Yeah, let’s just ride,.

“I replied.

I wanted to ride through the city with no talking, but their asses just kept talking. I shifted gears and sped up. Forty, fifty, sixty, seventy.

“Sa-sss-ss-Sasha. Sl-slo-sss-slow—”

Beans cutting Peanut off damn near startled me.

“Slow yo ass down!”

I couldn’t slow down because, since being back in Toussaint after meeting Zeus, my life had been going full speed with no brakes. The man I love was upset with me because he thought I was cheating. My ex and I finally got the closure we needed, only to be hit with a bomb. The nigga I trusted, and thought was my friend had violated me in a way that destroyed a part of me. He had taken something from me that I could never get back. So, no, there was no slowing down.

Switch gears. I lifted my bike, popped a wheelie, then came down hard.

“I see you, girl!.

“Monfua laughed.

We continued riding through the city and pulled back up to Mali’s house. This was the first ride we had done without Soho. It felt different, but in a good way. The truth was he was a snake in our crew who should have been gone years ago, but the loyalty we had for him kept him around. I’m sure this was the same feeling Pierre was going through. I wanted him to know the truth about his cousin. He needed to know why we had lost our baby. It wasn’t his fault, and I wanted him to know that.

Beans slid his helmet off and came over to me.

“I want you to come on the show,.

“he said to me.

My head flew back, “Why?”

“I think you have a story to share. It’s time to get that shit off your chest. You never know what your story can do for others. For other black women just like you. When you’re ready, let me know. No pressure.”

Beans reminded me of Chevy, just much calmer. I smiled at him before he disappeared into the house. Mali stood on the lawn and gazed at the home we all loved so much.

“This is our last couple of days here, then we’re moving.”

I knew the feeling was bittersweet, but Chevy had made it to where all of them could live better. Everyone is beginning to face their truths and move to a new beginning, including me. I hope my new beginning wasn’t going to be without Zeus.