Page 40 of Christmas at the Home Farm Vets (Hartfell Village #2)

The following morning Gil, Pippa, Harriet and Alfie had already left for Australia and Erin found it strange to be taking the morning staff meeting without him.

She’d done it before when Gil had been unavailable, but this time it was different, and she struggled to meet Oli’s eyes.

He’d moved back into the spare bedroom last night and she’d missed him horribly.

It felt like a very backward step in their relationship, and she was confused by the conflicted emotions filling her mind.

Elaine was house sitting to look after Lola and Maud, plus the ponies, and both dogs knew something was amiss without their family around.

Posy hadn’t thawed towards Flo yet and before he’d left, Gil had erected another strand of electric fencing in the paddock so they could graze separately but within sight.

Flo was slowly putting on weight and Harriet had been practising leading her around the yard and getting her used to being handled.

Dorothy had mentioned that she used to drive a skewbald cob around the dale and Harriet had already asked her to teach Flo in the summer.

It was a full-on morning of farm calls and Erin felt chilled from the inside out as she drove, as flat and heavy as the grey skies laden with snow, after the decision she’d made to ask Oli to sleep in the spare room again.

She was glad to return to the practice for a late lunch, trying to summon a more festive feeling.

In the evening she wrapped her gifts and left them in her bedroom, not wanting Marnie to assume they were toys and rip all the paper off.

Oli had gone out and the cottage, even with Marnie and a festive classic on the television, felt diminished without him.

She settled Marnie and went up to bed before he arrived back, aware that the return to their first difficult days here was her own fault.

On Christmas Eve she left Marnie at home as she wouldn’t be out all day.

The morning was still a working one of routine consultations before they closed for all but emergencies.

Everyone was in a merry, festive mood and she loved how they’d pulled together in Gil’s absence, including Oli.

She’d heard him return last night and had turned over alone in her bed, missing him beside her more than she’d ever imagined.

By the time Erin returned from her two farm calls, snow was falling steadily, and she messaged her mum, checking in that the taxi was still okay to bring her over tomorrow.

It was costing a fortune, but she really didn’t care; it was worth every penny.

At the practice Christmas carols were playing in the office and Elaine had brought in homemade vanilla cupcakes decorated with snowmen.

Lola and Maud had their own treats and were curled in their usual spot behind Elaine’s desk.

Erin took a picture of them and sent it to Harriet, who’d apparently been tearful when she’d had to say goodbye to the animals.

Jess, sporting an antler headband decorated with flowers and scarlet berries, organised everyone into the kitchen once they’d closed, and the staff sat down with brews and Gabi’s delicious traditional Polish poppy seed cake, which disappeared in moments.

Gabi also handed out paper cups of mulled non-alcoholic punch as Elaine passed around their Secret Santa gifts.

Gil had already received a Grinch travel mug before he’d left and it had pride of place on a desk, ready for his return.

Their out-of-hours locum was covering the evening and Erin was aware she’d probably be called out at some point tomorrow; it came with the territory.

But as long as her mum got here safely then all would be well.

She suddenly realised that everyone was looking at her, and stood up hastily.

She hadn’t planned anything to say but now seemed the right moment to express her gratitude.

‘So before we open our gifts, I’d like to thank Elaine for arranging Secret Santa.

’ Everyone else murmured their thanks, and she was aware of Oli at the back of the group, his eyes on her.

‘I know Gil’s already thanked you for your work since he took over the practice and wished you all the best for Christmas.

I’d also like to say thank you for your welcome and helping me find my place here.

You all know how much I love it, and it means the world to be working alongside you.

’ She held up her paper cup. ‘Merry Christmas, I hope you have a wonderful one.’

That hurt too, as she imagined what kind of Christmas Oli was going to have without his family.

Erin sat down and they opened their gifts.

Elaine was delighted with a cream tote bag covered in black paw prints; Steph loved her scrubs bag decorated with cats and dogs; and Gabi was thrilled with a water bottle emblazoned with ‘fifty shades of vet medicine’ in scarlet.

Erin thought that Jess, who loved to be glamorous even when she was cosying up at home, might guess that she’d chosen the pair of fluffy white slippers decorated with diamante hearts.

Jess gave her a knowing look and declared them perfect.

Oli unwrapped his gift and he laughed at a green travel mug with ‘good luck finding better colleagues than us’ written around it.

To Erin it was a stark reminder that he’d be leaving soon after Gil returned, and she listened with half an ear to the teasing as he promised it was absolutely true.

She unwrapped her own gift to discover an A5 notebook, but it was the image of a woman wearing scrubs and the words written beneath that made her gulp.

Holding a stethoscope in one hand, a cat on the woman’s right with a dog on her left, the inscription read ‘never forget the difference you make’.

It could have come from any one of her colleagues, most likely Jess, but when she caught Oli’s eyes on hers, she was in no doubt.

At Catz they’d talked about their future careers, and she’d told him then she wanted to make a difference to the lives of animals and help those who cared for them.

She saw the memory in his gaze, and she felt it again; the realisation that he knew her so well.

It was impossible to imagine anyone else could ever touch her life in the same way.

She blinked back the emotion before it became apparent, and he turned away to laugh at something Steph was saying.

The staff parted in the snow outside the practice, and Erin was thankful to pick up a message from a local farmer who’d be coming later to clear the driveway.

They needed access to the surgery at all hours and Gil had asked him to keep an eye on the weather and help if he could.

She replied to thank the farmer gratefully, aware that his own work didn’t end with the holidays.

She’d definitely be ready for the week off she had planned in early January, before lambing season kicked off in earnest.

She’d ordered a veg box from Violet and Daphne at the shop and she called for it on the way home.

The two sisters were looking forward to having Dorothy over for lunch, something they’d been doing for years, and they were busy with customers calling for last-minute shopping.

Erin also picked up some more mince pies before wishing them a happy Christmas and lugging the box out to her pickup through gathering snow.

She’d bought plenty so she could send an extra lunch back with her mum, and her family could enjoy it at home on Boxing Day.

She already had the turkey in the fridge and Heather had brought over one of Joyce’s Christmas puddings on a previous visit.

She’d also be fetching a trifle as well and Erin couldn’t wait; no one made trifle like her nan.

She let herself into the cottage, shaking the snow from her hat as she carried the box through to the kitchen.

Oli was already changed after a shower, and he settled on the floor with Marnie to play with her.

Erin plugged her phone in to charge so she was prepared if she had to go out, and after her own shower she was in the kitchen to make a start on tomorrow’s lunch preparations.

‘Can I help?’ Oli appeared at the door. ‘Marnie’s crashed now, I’ve tired her out.’

‘You could do the sprouts, if you don’t mind?’ Erin pointed to the stalks still sitting in the box on the floor; there simply wasn’t room on the worktop. She had a playlist of brass band carols going and found it soothing and sad all at once; reminding her of family and the traditions they loved.

‘So what do I need to do?’ He lifted a stalk from the box. ‘I had no idea that sprouts grew like this, I thought they came in plastic bags from the supermarket.’

‘Ha ha.’ She pointed to a spare chopping board as she carried on peeling potatoes; there could never be enough roasties. ‘Just take the bottom bit off and tidy them up.’

‘So I suppose you’re going to tell me they’re essential with Christmas lunch.’ Oli started snapping sprouts from the stalk and she smiled.

‘It’s not even a discussion. Although my nan and grandad can’t agree on how to serve them. Nan likes them plain and Grandad prefers them with a bit of crispy bacon, so she makes both.’

‘Which are you going to serve?’

‘Both,’ Erin said promptly. Until this moment she hadn’t even considered how awkward lunch might be. Her mum knew her so well and was bound to sense the new tension between her and Oli. ‘Got to stick with tradition.’

‘You’ll really miss your grandparents tomorrow,’ he said quietly. Bits of sprouts were spilling on the worktop as he peeled.

Erin nodded. She was breathing him in again, thinking of falling asleep with him beside her. It was worse now, to step back to what they’d been before last weekend. Before she’d had the reality of making love with him to remind her how wonderful it really was.