Page 58 of Center of Gravity

We got out of the truck and approached the front door. Tom knocked, stepped back, waited. Finally the door opened in a crack just big enough for a shaft of rancid air to spill out and a suspicious eye to peer out at us. A shiny Cadillac pulled in behind our truck. Great, hoarder and concerned family member, I guessed. These were my least favorite jobs. And somehow, that made me think of Rob, pulling up to his parents’ house that first day, how he’d come racing down the stairs after Winslow.

God. I needed to stop. I really, really needed to stop.

19

Rob

Walking back into my apartment was like returning from a tropical vacation and taking a cold, lonely shower in the midst of a snowstorm. I opened all of the windows, in spite of the heat, to let the place air out. After sticking so close to my heels that I almost unintentionally kicked him a few times, Winslow relaxed and spent a solid half hour trotting from room to room, sniffing baseboards, corners and closets until he’d mapped his new domain. Finally, he hopped up into one corner of the couch, pawed at a pillow until it fell off, then curled up and fell asleep. I guess that meant he’d completed his survey of his new home and found everything satisfactory.

Alex had been right. Having Winslow with me made everything feel more alive somehow. Less empty, at least.

“Don’t destroy the carpets, buddy,” I told him the following morning as I left for work.

“Well, fancy seeing you here,”my boss said with a glimmer of a smile as I knocked. I strolled into his office with my coffee and sat across from him, resting one ankle over the opposite knee.

“A regular Elvis sighting these days.”

He chuckled.

“I went over all of our accounts again, but it looks like Sean got his act together.”

“He did. He’s really been on top of things lately.”

I nodded smoothly, “Good.”

Richard paused, grimaced, and then put his elbows on the desk, lowering his voice, though there was hardly anyone else in the building this early in the morning. “His wife lost the baby. I wasn’t sure he’d say anything. Did he?”

I shook my head. “Not a thing.” I hadn’t heard from him in weeks, thankfully, but I felt a sympathetic pang for him. “Shit.”

“Yeah. I think that might have been behind his erratic behavior over the past several weeks. She was pretty far along.”

A shiver of guilt ran through me for coming down so hard on him when I was last in his office. “I’ll talk to him when he gets in.”

Richard nodded. “Probably a good idea.”

We were quiet for a few moments. I studied the pictures on the bookcase behind him. I’d never wanted a family. Not in a traditional sense. I wanted a partner, yes, but I’d never had a strong leaning for kids. Idly, I wondered if Alex wanted them, and almost as soon as the thought surfaced, I buried it with a deep breath.

Richard cleared his throat and my attention snapped back to him.

“On the subject of appearances, how are you doing? You look pretty good.”

I nodded, thumping the air cast. “Aside from this hunk of plastic preventing me from running, I’m good. Back’s good. Got the house done and it’s on the market as of noon today.”

He studied me so intently it almost flustered me. Had Sean mentioned our relationship?

“You’ve had a lot on your plate this year. I don’t want you to get overloaded,” he said.

I sat there for a second, trying to figure out if this was genuine, friendly concern or concern from a business standpoint. Maybe it was a bit of both.

I found a smile. “I’m fine, Richard, really. Staying busy has been good for me and having the house finished is a load off.”

“Good,” he said, lacing his fingers over his paunch. “I’ve submitted your name for promotion to partner. It’ll take a bit for it to go through, I imagine, but it’ll see you busier than you ever thought you’d be, that’s for sure.”

“I can handle it,” I assured him. And I could.

I thought, though, that I should’ve been more excited. This was everything I’d been working toward, the glossy apex of my career. Instead, a vague unease blossomed in the back of my mind and tickled the edges of my consciousness, maddeningly indefinable. “I appreciate your confidence in me,” I said, and mustered my smile wider.

“You’ve certainly earned it.”