Page 231 of Broken Brothers

The truth.

No matter how fucking painful it would be, no matter how much it would hurt to share with her, I knew I had to share what had happened last night. Yes, the buildup would suck and be awkward, but when she heard that I had rejected Sarah… I mean, what could more strongly say I was all-in on Layla than that?

I texted her and told her I would be at her place in just a few minutes. I only realized then I probably should have given her more advanced warning that I was coming than I had, but it was too late now. If she wanted to wait, I’d find a nearby coffee shop until she was ready. If that took until the evening, fine.

I knew this behavior was acting like a little kid. It was acting like the high schooler who swore that he would do whatever it took. The difference was that now, I had the means to actually follow through—with Edwin’s money—and I actually did love Layla.

Maybe I had been afraid to say it before, and maybe I had said it in an orgasmic rush when we first met, but all of the experiences we’d had, all of the dark trials, all of the ways we’d helped each other—that was love.

Thankfully, Layla agreed to let me up just a minute before the Uber arrived. It parked, I tore out, and I headed straight for the elevators.

I then realized it was a good thing I hadn’t had sex for an entirely different reason than staying good to Layla—I hadn’t showered since before my date with Sarah. Had I had sex, I would have reeked of it within seconds, and that really would have shut the door on it all.

Layla’s door was slightly open when I knocked and stepped inside. It was sobering and startling to see that she already had many boxes laid out, full of her belongings.

“Hey,” she said softly.

“Hey,” I said. “So… this is real, huh?”

“Yeah,” she mumbled. “I have to, Chance. I’m sorry.”

I bit my lip for a second before I decided I had to fight. At least it was something I was good at; at least I knew how to fight well.

“Layla, I know you’re already in the process of packing up and you’ve probably already told these guys you’re going there, but just, let me tell you what happened last night,” I said.

This is a big fucking risk you’re taking. You better hope she admires your honesty.

“I went out with Sarah. It was a moment of weakness. I almost fell for it and slept with her. But, but! I didn’t. I stopped her from sleeping with me. You know why, Layla? It’s because if I slept with her, I knew I’d never be able to look you in the eyes. You said it yourself. You didn’t want to worry about Sarah being the girl I’d go running to when things went bad. And I did, at first, yes, but right when I could have gone all the way, I didn’t.”

I moved forward and put my hands on Layla’s shoulders.

“And that’s because I love you, Layla,” I said. “I know I was weak this weekend. I know I will have moments in the future in which I am weak. But I care for you and love you. I realized this last night to the highest level, and I’ll do whatever you need me to do to be the best man possible. Please give me that opportunity, Layla. Please recognize how much you mean to me. Please.”

Layla bit her lip and looked down.

“That’s very sweet, Chance, and I have to admit, I figured you’d go to her as soon as I sent you away,” she said. “But I believe you when you say you didn’t sleep with her.”

“You have good reason to,” I said.

But Layla’s face didn’t improve.

“This was the Chance that I wanted to see yesterday morning,” she said. “The one who was sweet, charming, andromantic. Not impulsive and combative. This was the one that could have made me say yes. But Chance…”

And then she said the four words that shattered me.

“It’s too late now.”

I came all the way here on a moment’s notice to try and make things better. I passed up sex with the girl of my dreams so I could look her in the eye. I fought like hell to atone for my mistakes.

But sometimes, life just doesn’t work out.

“I’m sorry, Chance, I really am,” she said. “But I can’t renege on this commitment. It’s for a major position, and I gave my word I’d come. They have me starting on Monday—they’re desperate. It would destroy my reputation, which is already somewhat precarious because I left my uncle’s company.”

“I understand,” I said, even though I didn’t.

I did understand her rationale. I just didn’t understand how… how I could have given it all, how I could have done everything I could have to make it work, and it didn’t.

Layla and I had gone through so much… but she was moving. Nothing was going to change that.