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"What?" Quintin seems shocked. "Why am I doing it? I wasn't the one who made the post."

"We made this agreement together," says Miles.

"Look," says Helix, leaning forward and pointing his fork at Miles, "we need a glass cannon, and you're the one who physically typed out the post."

"Fine, fine," grumbles Miles. "I can do this."

"Ready when you are." I'm not even sure why I'm fighting, since this gesture is absolutely amazing. While my using them for inspiration is harmless and they'll never find out, I'm not sure they understand the impact of what they just did to me on their channel.

When I'd talked to Quintin and Lionel about being fair, that if they wanted me to tell my critique group and friends about our dating situation, then they had to tell theirs, I never thought they would take that as meaning they should announce it publicly to the whole world.

I'd thought we could start small and make those big-step decisions together, but they made that choice for me. For us.

Since I've moved in, we've all been making our own choices separately, but if we're doing this for real, we need to decide things together. Like a real couple. Or whatever a relationship between six people is called.

Miles takes a deep breath and grips the edge of the table. "We're sorry."

The rest of the team nods in agreement, waiting for me to tell them it's okay.

"Sorry for what?"

Miles drops his head into his hands with an exasperated sigh. "For all the things we listed before."

"But I'm not sorry that you told your friend about us," adds Quintin.

"No, definitely not for that," agrees Lionel.

"Although it wasn't fun when she tried to kiss me," says Miles.

There isn't anything Miles could have said to get me to completely forgive them faster. Or make me feel worse. I'm the one who put them in that position by believing that Sasha was my friend.

Getting up, I slide onto Miles's lap and wrap him in the tightest hug possible.

"I'm sorry that my poor judgement in friends caused you to be put in such an uncomfortable position." I kiss him on the cheek.

Miles wraps his arms tight around my middle and rests his chin on my head. "Thank you."

"And that's how you give an apology," I tell everyone, looking around the table so they can all make a note of my skills. Even as my secret of using them weighs heavy on my chest, I just hold Miles, silently willing him to accept my own unspoken apology.

My boyfriends all chuckle, and we tuck into the amazing breakfast they prepared. It's a challenge with Miles still holding me, but I don't mind. Sometimes I just want to be held too.

My feet slow as I round the corner to our usual table in the dive bar. I haven't heard from Sasha since she came over for movie night five days ago. My anxiety has been going haywire with my uncertainty about seeing her again.

Maddie and Angela are at the table chatting and my shoulders immediately relax. Although just because Sasha isn't here right now doesn't mean she won't show up.

"Loved the pages on the new book," says Maddie, leaning back in her chair.

"Writing a new one is probably a good distraction for while you're waiting for your editor to return your manuscript," says Angela.

"To say I'm on edge these days is an understatement." I huff a laugh, but I'm nervous and distracted, still glancing around the room in case Sasha is approaching.

"And it never gets easier," says Maddie. "We just learn how to mitigate the anxiety."

"Thanks for ordering for me." Nodding at my usual glass of wine, then looking over to Sasha's empty chair. "No Sasha tonight?" I try to keep the sound of hope out of my voice.

"Your welcome. I figured we should since The Moat is so busy tonight, and no.

She said something about going home to visit family.

" Angela shakes her head, and I feel the tension leave my body now that I know I won't have to see Sasha tonight.

"I'm surprised she didn't tell you. I'd thought you two did a lot of things together. "

"We mostly get together to write." I shrug. Or try to fuck each other's boyfriends, apparently .

"Well, your writing has certainly changed so if it's from working with Sasha keep it up," says Maddie.

"Thanks." I bite my lip. I'm not sure if I should ask, but it'd help my peace of mind, so I say, "Do you know when Sasha plans to be back?"

"She didn't say." Maddie glances over at Angela. "Did something happen between you two?"

"Kind of," I mumble. Then, without even consciously deciding to, I end up spilling the whole story about how Sasha had called me a bad writer and kissed my boyfriend.

"Oh no." Maddie reaches across the table to hold my hand. "I'm so sorry. You're not a bad writer, and I'm glad your boyfriend made it clear that he's in a relationship. He sounds like a good man."

I nod, appreciating their words, but it's still hard to believe.

My boyfriends are so famous in their own little circle, it almost feels like it's a matter of time before someone tries to take them from me again.

And although they originally only hired me to be their girlfriend so they can use me whenever and wherever, I feel like we've moved past that emotionally and are in a real relationship.

"Soooo." Angela casts a glance at Maddie. "Which one of those two guys who came by last week to pick you up is your boyfriend?"

I cover my face for a moment in embarrassment. This is so awkward to talk about, but my boyfriends and I had talked about it over breakfast and we're going forward with telling people about our relationship. They don't need to know that I'm getting paid for it though.

I take a deep breath and spit it out. "Both of them are my boyfriends. Well … two of my boyfriends."

"Wait, you mean there's more?" asks Angela, her eyebrows raised. "How many boyfriends do you have?"

"Five," I mumble into my glass of wine.

"Are these all of your roommates? You'd said you have five roommates," says Maddie.

"Yeah, it kind of just happened after I moved in." This is technically true. First they hired me, then I moved in, and then we started sleeping together. I can't pinpoint exactly when I fell for them and this all became real, though.

"Whew!" Maddie fans herself. "No wonder you're writing such hot scenes now, with boyfriends like that!"

"Some people struggle seeing other people have success and happiness," says Angela, reaching out to pat my shoulder. "I hope you and Sasha can get past what happened to continue critiquing together. But if you can't, we understand and we can have that difficult conversation with her."

"I'm not sure what's going to happen with her, to be honest. I'd thought we were friends, but then she did this so I'm not sure if that was ever true.

" I pause to sip more wine. Tough nights like this require more alcohol.

It might be a three-glass evening. "But thank you.

It means a lot to have you both in my corner.

I'm just glad she's not here so we can both have some space away from each other. "

"Well we're here for you," says Angela. "Just let us know what you need and we're ready to help."

"Thank you. I really appreciate that. I think for now I'm just going to throw myself into my work." And prove to both myself and Sasha that I'm a good writer. I pull out Angela and Maddie's chapters that I'd marked over the last couple of days, shuffle through them and put Sasha's back in my bag.

"Yes, let's get some work done. After all, that's why we're here." Maddie pulls out her marked pages too. "Then after, we can have another drink and you can tell us all the details about these five sexy gamer boyfriends of yours."

"Sure." I laugh, and we settle into our discussion. They have no idea they've already read the dirtiest details.

Without Sasha, we get through our comments surprisingly quickly, and while there is still a lot of constructive criticism, there's no pushback, and there are a lot of compliments too.

"Oh goody, the eye candy has arrived." Maddie blindly stuffs the copies of her chapter into her bag, her gaze focused on something behind me.

Turning in my seat, I spot all five of my boyfriends filtering through the tables as they approach. Even Ethan.

My boyfriends had promised—or threatened?—to come pick me up, and I'd told them repeatedly I could handle it.

Apparently, they didn't believe me.

Shuffling my own papers into my bag, I tamp down the worry that zings through me. I don't think Maddie would also hit on my boyfriends in front of me, especially after hearing about the Sasha incident, but I'm still on edge.

"Here to collect your girlfriend?" asks Angela, loudly.

All five of my boyfriends break out into the biggest grins.

"So you're telling everyone about us now?" asks Miles, sliding into Sasha's empty seat.

"Says the guy who announced it to millions," I shoot back as the others snag empty chairs from nearby tables and pull them up.

"Wait, what?" asks Maddie, confused.

I don't blame her. She's not in the gamer scene, so she doesn't realize that some of these players have so many followers. I didn't know anything about it either, until I moved in with these guys.

"We made a small post on our socials so girls wouldn't hit on us." Quintin side-eyes me to judge how I handle this information.

Sasha isn't here, but I'm still keeping a close eye on Maddie and Angela even though I'm pretty sure I don't have anything to worry about.

We talk a lot about sex and they've made some wild comments, but I shouldn't immediately assume they'll hit on my boyfriends right in front of me.

Although Sasha had been just fine with doing it behind my back, so I'm still cautious.

"But we learned from that, didn't we?" I say, grinning. I can't help but provoke them. I'll pay for it later, but I know that will be more of a reward than a punishment.

"Yes, we did," agrees Miles.

"It's still cool though, when you tell your friends," whispers Ethan, leaning close.

I roll my eyes, but my heart still flutters a little harder because the more people who know, the more real this entire situation becomes. And the harder it will be to walk away. I'm not sure if that's what I want anymore. Not if it means no longer being part of their lives.