Page 43 of Beautifully Shattered (Secrets & Scars #3)

T railing the tip of my finger over the dusting of hair that leads from Ringo’s navel, I watch his face to see if he’s awake.

I did this a few months ago, when everything was new and I was struggling with my trauma. He’d been asleep, and I was curious. I somehow trusted him not to hurt me, even though I don’t think I really knew that at the time.

He’d been rock hard in my hand, and I loved the feeling of being responsible for turning him on. For making him feel good. For making him come.

Now, I want to do it again. But this time, I want more.

His breathing is even, telling me he’s still asleep, so I ease the sheet down, revealing his package.

For a dick that’s soft, it sure is big. His erect size had terrified me at first, reminding me of… nope, not thinking about that arsehole. But as always, Ringo made sure I was well prepared, and the first time he sank inside me… well, now I’m all hot and flustered.

Sitting up, I get comfy next to him, careful not to disturb him too much, and I gently graze my fingers up and down his sleeping dick, applying a little more pressure after a few strokes, watching him slowly harden.

My eyes flick to the dressing on his side, reminding me that he was shot five days ago when we raided the Rebels' compound. Maybe now isn’t the best time to be doing this.

But then again, we were dry humping last night, and he had no issue coming all over my stomach so…

A flush springs to my cheeks at the memory, and the way he latched onto my nipple and drank from me, yet again.

I know him doing that is delaying my milk drying up, but I just can’t bring myself to stop.

I know it’s a weird thing to want to do, but in a twisted way, making milk still ties me to Bobbi, and I know that’s not healthy.

But it feels so damn good, and it’s something beautiful and erotic to us. So I just can’t ask him to stop.

Not when he loves it so much.

Focusing on his dick, I’m fascinated, watching it grow and thicken, lengthening at the same time. When it’s hard enough to gently pick up, I wrap my hand around it, gripping it firmly the way he taught me, and slowly pump it up and down, from base to tip.

“Angel,” he mumbles, the words barely passing his lips, and I can tell he’s still mostly asleep.

Shit. Why does this turn me on so much? Arousing him while he’s half-conscious ?

I still have two weeks until we can have penetrative sex, but the idea of making him so hard in his sleep and sinking down onto him while he’s powerless to stop me has me burning with need.

God, I want to do that so much.

I won’t, though. Not this morning. Not today. But I will be taking him inside me.

Inside my mouth.

I’ve been nervous about it. It’s never been anything but brutal torture for me, in the worst possible way.

But I know he’d love to feel my lips wrapped around him.

To feel my tongue swirl around the fat head of his dick.

And I’m ready to make this memory with him, even if he doesn’t get a say, since I haven’t asked his permission.

Maybe I should’ve, but he loves me exploring his body, and I know he’d tell me to stop if he wanted me to. So I pump his dick one more time before lowering my head and flicking my tongue over the bead of pre-cum.

His dick jerks, and he mumbles something again, but it’s incoherent. So I flick my tongue again.

When his hips lift a fraction, I know he’s going to wake fully soon, so I part my lips wide, and guide his dick into my mouth.

I only take in his tip, sucking on his head, swirling my tongue, before sucking again.

“Abs,” he mutters louder this time, and I know he’s waking, so I open wider and swallow him deeper, until I know if I take anymore, I’ll gag. “Fuuuck, Angel. What are you doing?”

I don’t answer, because obviously he can feel exactly what I’m doing, but my eyes flick up his body to find his whiskey eyes blinking open .

With my hand tightly around his base, I keep my eyes locked on his and I suck, pushing myself to take more of him, fighting the urge to gag.

“This is the best fucking way to wake up,” he groans, his hand fisting gently in my hair, but shit… I stiffen.

“Relax, Angel. I’m not trying to control you. I’ll let go and put my hand above my head if you want?”

“Mo.” I try to speak around his dick and shake my head, making him chuckle.

“Okay. Fuuuck. Okay.”

The way the whiskey colour of his eyes is nearly swallowed by his blown pupils drives me wild.

This.

This is what I love.

The power I have over him.

The power to make him feel this good.

The power to shatter him into a million pieces under my tongue.

Heat pools between my legs, and I whimper as I suck him in deeper, now ravenous to feel him hit the back of my throat, even if it does make me gag.

Shit. I think I want that. I want to give him that.

Popping him free, I move to straddle one of his legs, his hand loosening in my hair as I shift.

He never takes his eyes off me. His heated stare is fixed, like he’s in a trance and only I can command him.

“Is your pussy wet, Angel?”

“Yes.” I nod, pressing my panty-clad pussy to his thigh before lowering my lips back to his dick, and sucking him back in .

“Fuuuck, I’m gonna come way too fast. Your hot little mouth feels so fucking good wrapped around me.”

I moan around his tip, gliding my tongue over it, then sinking him deeper again.

As my tongue, lips and hand work together to build his pleasure, I ride out my own over his thigh, grateful I’m only down to a thin precautionary panty liner now since my bleeding is practically gone.

“You like my cock in your mouth?” he asks, knowing I can’t answer, but when I take him in further, gagging around him, he knows exactly how much I do.

I never thought I’d be able to do this again. Never thought I’d handle that feeling, but I want everything with this man. So much so that one day soon, I hope I can give him all the control to use my mouth exactly how he wants without me slipping into a PTSD episode.

“Fuck, Angel. I’m gonna come soon. You might wanna stop if you don’t want it in your mouth.”

I don’t stop. If anything, his warning sets me off, and I suck and gag and pump him while grinding on his thigh, a frenzy tearing through me.

“Fuck! Fuck! Fuuuuck!” he roars, his hips thrusting up uncontrollably, choking me deeper as his control snaps, and he fists my hair, holding me down.

I wait for the terror. For the flashback. For the panic. But all that comes is blinding pleasure shooting straight to my core as he thrusts and I suck him like a starved animal.

“I’m coming!” he roars, his body going rigid, and the moment the first spurt of cum hits the back of my throat, I grind myself so hard on his legs that I shatter.

I cry out around his pulsing dick, my mouth flooding with so much cum it leaks from the corners, but I don’t stop sucking, desperate to milk every last drop from him, just like he does with my nipples.

“Angel. Baby. Fuck, stop… ahhhh.” He groans and jerks, his dick clearly oversensitive, so I ease up, swallowing what I can, the rest oozing from the sides of my mouth and down my neck as I gasp for breath, his dick popping free.

“Was that okay?” I pant, my chest heaving as I wipe at my mouth with the back of my hand. “Did I do it right?”

“Right?” He makes a strangled choking sound. “I think my soul left my body, Angel.”

My lips kick up in a slow smile.

“So what you’re saying is, I’m God?”

A laugh bursts from his lips, and he sits up quickly, grabbing me and pulling me back down to the bed with him.

“Wait. I’m covered in your cum,” I protest, but it doesn’t faze him, and he does something I never expected him to do.

He flattens his tongue to my neck and licks up one of the trails of his own seed.

“Mmm. I taste fucking good on you.”

“Shit,” I pant, grinding myself against him, and he chuckles.

“Does it turn you on to watch me lick up my own mess, Angel?”

I nod, slamming my lips to his, tasting his cum on his tongue as our mouths clash in a ravenous battle of need.

This man has the power to turn me into the filthiest, most depraved woman on Earth, and I’m not even mad about it .

We roll and tumble on the bed, my pussy and his dick not getting the memo that they’ve just had an orgasm, and I blindly hook my fingers into my panties, trying to shove them down.

“Uh-uh,” he mutters into my mouth before breaking the kiss and pushing up to loom over me. “No sex yet. You’ve got two more weeks.”

“I’m fine. I’m ready now.”

“Doctor said six weeks, Angel. I won’t fuck you a minute before.”

Huffing, my arms flop back onto the bed, and I pout.

“You’re no fun.”

His smile is gentle as he brushes my wayward hair off my face.

“You didn’t think that a minute ago.”

I roll my eyes, but the sudden sound of his phone ringing has us both freezing.

It’s three in the morning. Calls at this hour are never good.

Shifting off me, Ringo reaches for his phone on the bedside table, his brows shooting up as he looks at the screen.

“It’s your friend.”

He turns the screen to me, the name ‘HUSH’ flashing across the display, which is weird, since she’s not verbal. She usually just texts.

Then I notice it’s actually a video call, and my pulse jitters as I sit up, quickly patting my hair down and wiping my neck in case there’s any cum left.

Then I hit accept.

The screen flickers, the frame frozen for a few seconds before Dee’s face comes into view.

“Dee? Is everything alright?”

She smiles and nods, giving me a thumbs up .

“Uhhh, what has you calling me at three in the morning?”

She grabs a notepad and scribbles something on it before holding it up to the camera.

‘It’s only 2:30 in the morning here.’

My brows shoot up, and Ringo’s head pops into the frame beside mine.

“Where are you?”

She scribbles again, then turns it to us.

‘Darwin.’

I stiffen. “Darwin? As in the Northern Territory? That Darwin?”

She nods, her smirk almost shit-eating.

Again, she writes on the notepad before showing us.

‘Look who I found.’