Page 33 of B.D.E: Falling Hard For A BBW

Ivy

It had been two weeks since I found that damn letter on the pillow.

Two weeks since I cried harder than I ever had in my life.

I packed my things that same morning and went back home.

I thought of staying, waiting for him to finally show his face and explain the letter.

I didn’t have it in me to sit in that house surrounded by pieces of him.

His scent still clung to the sheets. His toothbrush was still in the cup.

A small part of me even hoped that it was a mistake, though I knew in my heart he meant every word he’d written in that letter, I just couldn’t take it.

Here I was, back at the café I once ran so confidently, now barely able to make it through a full shift without getting lightheaded.

Tori had been helping every day. She refused to let me shut down.

Refused to let me spiral too far. But even she didn’t know how deep I was sinking.

She wiped down the last table and slid into the chair across from me behind the counter, plopping two lemonades on the surface and passing one my way.

“You look like shit,” she said casually, sipping hers.

“Thanks. I feel worse.”

She studied me for a minute. I avoided her eyes, focused on the condensation dripping down my cup.

“You can’t keep doing this,” she said finally. “You’re here, but you’re not here. You’re pregnant and barely keeping your head up. You don’t eat unless I remind you. You don’t sleep. What’s the plan, Ivy? You gonna stay like this till the baby pops out?”

I shrugged, even though I had no answer. “I’m trying.”

“Try harder. Ghost ain’t the first man to walk away, and if he’s as dangerous as you made him sound, it might be a blessing in disguise.”

I swallowed hard, my chest tightening all over again. “You weren’t there,” I murmured. “You didn’t see how he looked at me… like I was more than just a body. He didn’t just fuck me. He cared.”

Tori leaned back and folded her arms. “Then why the hell did he leave?”

I flinched at her question.

She sighed, her tone softening. “I’m not trying to hurt you. I’m just saying… maybe he thought walking away was the best thing for you.”

“I still haven’t told him about the baby,” I admitted, glancing away.

“Part of me wanted to. I’ve thought about it every damn day, especially now that I can barely get through a morning without puking or crying or both.

But I kept thinking… what if he doesn’t want this?

What if he tells me to get rid of it? What if I’m just some girl he slept with, and he never really saw a future with me at all? ”

Tori frowned. “Ivy…”

“I don’t even know what we were,” I said. “I mean, were we together? Was I, his girl? His fuck buddy? I don’t know what people call it these days. We never even talked about it. He just… made me feel something real, and now he’s gone like it never happened.”

Tori reached across the counter and grabbed my hand. “You can’t keep holding all this in. Let it out, cry, scream, punch a wall, I don’t care. But don’t sit here dying on the inside trying to keep it together. You’re too strong for that shit, baby.”

Tears welled up again, but I held them in.

Tori’s phone buzzed, and she glanced down. A smile crept across her face as she typed back quickly.

“What?” I asked.

“Marcus, he’s been helping me out with some errands lately. We’ve kind of been… seeing each other?”

I raised an eyebrow. “Wait, seriously?”

She grinned. “It’s still new, but yeah. He got this whole calm-but-boss nigga thing going on that makes my inside do cartwheels and my coochie scream.”

I laughed weakly for the first time in days.

“I just told him to meet me here,” she said, standing. “I figured it’s time y’all met. Maybe it’ll take your mind off things.”

“I’m really not in the mood?—”

“Too late. He’s already ten minutes away.”

I shook my head but didn’t argue. I didn’t have the energy to.

I just had to get through the rest of the day trying not to be jealous of my best friend having happiness while mine was gone.

That’s too easy, right? A few minutes later, the bell on the café door jingled and in walked a tall man with warm brown skin and a low fade.

His eyes scanned the place until they landed on Tori, and he gave her a grin that softened everything about him. She waved him over.

“Ivy, this Marcus. Marcus, Ivy.”

He nodded at me. “Nice to meet you.”

“You too,” I said, offering a weak smile.

He pulled up a chair beside Tori and leaned in to kiss her cheek. “I missed you today, lady.”

“Boy, I saw you last night.”

“Still missed you,” he shrugged.

I smiled quietly to myself. Their banter was easy, lighthearted.

I didn’t want to intrude or make anything awkward, so I busied myself with slow sips of my tea.

I sat back and let them mingle, watching as they flirted until Tori stepped away to help a customer who had just walked in.

Marcus made his way over and sat on the stool beside me.

“So, Ms. Ivy, how’s everything going with you? Tori told me you hadn’t been feeling too well,” he said.

I chuckled softly. “Tori’s always been a little overprotective. I’m fine, Marcus. Really. I appreciate you asking. I’ve just had a lot on my plate lately, but I’m bouncing back… slowly but surely. You taking care of my most prized possession?” I teased, raising a brow at him.

“As much as she’ll let me,” he laughed. “You know how she is, headstrong and independent.”

“Just stick with her. She’s worth it. She’s always been tough because she had to be. Maybe with you, she can finally enjoy her soft girl era.”

“That’s the plan,” he said, his eyes following Tori across the room like she hung the damn stars.

I watched him watching her, and I hoped for her sake, she wasn’t playing around.

Just by watching him, I could tell that man adored her.

Marcus pulled out his phone and started scrolling while he waited for her, and I sat in silence, letting my thoughts drift.

Something I’d been doing more now than ever.

Lately, I’d felt… off, uneasy. Like someone was watching me.

But every time I turned around, there was nothing there.

The other night, I swore I felt a hand brush my hair back while I was sleeping.

I jolted awake, heart pounding, but the room was empty.

I told myself it was stress. Or maybe just vivid dreams. Still, I couldn’t shake the feeling.

A few hours passed, and eventually Tori began closing up the café for the night.

I was beyond grateful she had stepped in these past couple weeks when I physically and mentally couldn’t.

Marcus stayed behind to help, and I practically had to push her out the door, promising her I’d be fine.

She deserved a night with someone who clearly cared.

As for me… I just wanted my bed. I planned to crawl under the covers and wrap myself around the pillow Ghost used when he was here, clutching it like a lifeline until sleep finally took me.

Maybe I was crazy. Maybe I was just in love with a man who ghosted me.

But I couldn’t shake the feeling that he was still out there.

Somewhere close, watching me, protecting me.

I didn’t know if that thought should terrify me or give me hope because part of me believed he’d come back to claim what was his. My heart.