Page 31 of B.D.E: Falling Hard For A BBW
Ivy
I hadn’t slept much the past two days. The walls felt like they were closing in on me and the silence pierced my ears.
The morning light crept through the cracks in the blinds, signaling another day without a word from Ghost. No call, no text, mot even the quick “you good?” he usually shot me whenever he was away.
That had become our thing… our rhythm. Lately, it had been nothing.
I curled deeper into the blanket on the couch, the same spot I’d been in for hours.
The phone Ghost gave me was hidden in the back of the bathroom cabinet like he said.
No calls, no texts, no internet. Just isolation and shadows in a place that didn’t even feel like mine.
I tried to distract myself, grabbing one of the books off the shelf, the Captured By A Bama Plug series I’d already read twice.
The words started to blur, my mind refused to settle.
I kept staring at the same paragraph, not reading a damn thing.
That’s when I got up, walked into the bathroom, and dug out the burner phone and said fuck it.
I was tired of feeling caged, tired of playing obedient for a man who left me in the dark.
The screen lit up as I scrolled until I found Tori’s name and hit dial. She picked up halfway through the second ring.
“Well damn,” she said, her voice coated in sleep and attitude. “You finally decide to call a bitch back?”
I exhaled a small laugh, the first one in days. “Girl, don’t start.”
“Don’t start?” she yawned. “That man been out there braking yo walls in, sis. You was just a virgin last week, Ivy. What kind of power Ghost got over you to still be boo’d up out the in the boondocks with him?”
“It’s... complicated.”
Tori snorted. “Complicated? Bitch, I know complicated. Wanna hear about mine?”
I sat on the edge of the bed and nodded even though she couldn’t see me. “Yeah, go ahead.”
“Tell me why I went to Marcus’s place last night and ended up handcuffed to his damn bed?”
“Wait—what? The one you went on the date with, fucked him and them ghosted him?”
“Stay focused, Ivy, it gets worse. He walked in, saw me on his couch, naked, mind you… and instead of being shocked, this man started talking shit about needing to check his doorman. Next thing I know, he got me bent over the ottoman, then we fuck damn near all night, from his living room to the bed.”
I pressed my hand to my face. “You’re insane.”
“Insane? Girl, I’m dicked down, stretched out, and still trying to remember how I got home this morning. He’s nasty, Ivy. The kind of nasty I don’t even feel comfortable saying out loud.”
Despite the heavy weight in my chest, I found myself laughing again. “So, what, he got you hooked now?”
“Hell yeah. I ain’t even gonna lie. But enough about me…spill. Where is your man? What’s his name again? Grim? Ghost? Casper?”
“Ghost,” I whispered, the name catching in my throat.
There was a pause. “Wait... you okay? You sound off.”
I lay back, staring at the ceiling. “I still haven’t told him about the pregnancy, Tori.”
“What?”
“I haven’t told him ye?—"
“I heard that part, fool. I’m just trying to figure out why the hell not.”
“I don’t even know what we are, Tori. We haven’t had the conversation.
We never actually put a title on what we’ve been doing.
I mean, we’ve been through some things..
. he’s protected me, provided for me, made me feel safe.
But I still don’t know if I’m his girlfriend or just some situation he’s keeping around. ”
“Do you love him?”
My stomach twisted. “I think I could. I know I’m falling in love with him. I’m scared that once I tell him, everything changes. What if he says it’s too much too soon? What if he disappears?”
“You already halfway in, Ivy. Hiding this baby isn’t gonna make him stay, and it damn sure won’t make him leave if he’s real about you. But you won’t know unless you talk to him.”
“I haven’t even heard from him,” I muttered. “Not today. Not even a ‘thinking of you’ text. I don’t know where he is or what he’s doing. I’m just... waiting.”
Tori’s tone turned serious. “If he don’t show up or call by tomorrow, I need you to get your black ass on a bus or an uber and come home. This fairy tale shit only cute until it’s not. You got a baby to think about now.”
“I know.”
“I mean it, Ivy. You’ve always been the soft one between us, but I’ll come snatch you outta there myself if you keep letting silence speak louder than actions.”
I wiped a tear before it had the chance to fall. “Thanks, Tori.”
“Anytime. Bitch, you need me to pull up with a shotgun or a plan B?”
I let out a small, tired laugh. “Let’s just wait one more day.”
“Fine. But if he don’t show, I’m coming right back out there and we doing a damn intervention. Got it?”
“Got it.”
We stayed on the phone for a few more minutes, catching up on nothing and everything, until her voice softened and she said, “I love you, Ivy. And you deserve a man who don’t make you question where you stand.”
“I love you too.”
We hung up. I sat there a moment longer, holding the phone, wondering what the hell I was doing…waiting for a man who could be anywhere, doing anything, while I held on to something he didn’t even know existed yet. But still, my heart hoped. Just one more day.