Page 2 of Barely Breathing (Merely Mortal #3)

Chapter

Two

Costin’s underground home is disorientating. I see hallways and doors stretching into shadows but have never explored them. I’m too afraid to look. It is based underneath Manhattan to keep him safe from daylight, but it doesn’t feel like it.

The last time I was here, I found electric lights behind the curtains, mimicking peeks of daylight. I can’t imagine what it would be like never to see the sun. The mirage must feed his nostalgia, even if it’s not real.

Perhaps there is a part of him that longs for the humanity he lost long ago. Or maybe it’s just another form of control—creating artificial day and night at his whim.

Maybe I keep trying to ascribe human emotions and motivations to a master vampire.

After feeling his cold touch and seeing how he looks at me... I’m not sure what’s more dangerous, believing he feels nothing or believing he feels too much.

The elevator has one direction: up. It opens to a marble foyer that reminds me of the inside of a large mausoleum with cold stone and soft light. I pause long enough to change out of the nightgown into my clothes. I open the elevator and toss the nightgown into the corner.

The silence is so deafening that my shoes sound too loud as I cross toward an oak door. As I pull the heavy door open, I’m surprised to see bright daylight. I would have guessed it was the middle of the night since the vampires downstairs are awake.

My mind is cloudy from being mesmerized for so long. I’m not sure what to feel. Costin should not have done that, but I’m used to supernaturals living by different rules and doing what they want. They don’t see things the same way humans do. My entire life, I’ve been forced to flow in the direction of others’ whims. My parents claim it’s for my protection because my family has a lot of supernatural enemies.

My family’s legacy is a web of magic and expectation, one I’ve never been able to untangle myself from. My father’s power is legendary, but my human birth mother was one of his many affairs. I take after Lorelai.

They say all families have issues.

My brother Anthony inherited their magic, and even my adopted human brother Conrad— as flawed as he was —had found ways to harness it before his death. And me? I’m the mortal afterthought.

Until recently.

Ever since I subdued Draakmar and faced the labyrinth challenge, I think they’ll look at me differently.

My adoptive brother Conrad betrayed me in the worst way by trying to set me up for multiple murders. Though Conrad is dead, his angry spirit still lingers—literally. He has been haunting me, appearing to give me threats as a constant reminder of his treachery.

No, that’s not right. Lingered . Past tense. A necromancer’s magic now imprisons Conrad’s angry spirit.

The heavy oak door of Costin’s home closes behind me with a decisive thud that seems to echo into eternity. I pinch the bridge of my nose and remind myself to breathe. My brain is still skipping around. Being mesmerized for a week has taken a toll.

I feel as if I’ve surfaced from a dream. Around me, the city is alive, and people pass without a clue as to what is happening beneath them. I think of Costin’s home, of the paranormal creatures hiding in the supernatural city below, infesting caverns and old subway tunnels.

I go toward the sound of traffic under the shadows of skyscrapers that make the morning feel earlier than it is. Even the familiar commotion of Manhattan feels different today. A street vendor’s coffee cart provides momentary cover as I pause to get my bearings. Anxiety gnaws at my stomach. I feel like someone is watching me, but I don’t see them.

Each step pulls me further from Costin’s intoxicating presence and deeper into a pit of doubt. I want to tell myself I’m crazy, that I’m okay, but I know better.

I shouldn’t feel safer alone on the streets, but I do. Or at least, I want to. I touch the amulet at my neck for comfort. I can be injured, but no one can kill me. Don’t ask me to explain why vampires can’t bite me, even if they don’t intend to kill me. I’m not going to question it too closely. I can assume it’s because their bite is death or some such reason. It’s not like my education covered these details. My tutor focused more on the just-don’t-get-bit-or-you’ll-be-dead lessons.

Draakmar stirs restlessly through the stone as if death isn’t the worst fate I should fear. I hope the creature can’t feel my annoyance with his constant interruptions. I mean, he is keeping me alive.

Costin’s distant voice lingers in my mind. “ You’re safer with me, Tamara. You know that .”

When Costin’s home is no longer in sight, I lift my phone to call for a car. I wait near the side of a building, trying not to draw attention to myself. A man passes with some kind of hybrid fluffy poodle, and all I can think of is werewolves. I stare at the dog until they disappear from view.

My ride pulls up, and the driver says nothing as I slip into the backseat. I rest my forehead against the window to watch the scenery as we pass through traffic. The sounds of car horns and squeaking brakes are so familiar they’re comforting. Even the half-dressed lady shouting obscenities into the street feels normal in the city.

My mind drifts, and I have no idea how long it takes us to arrive at the Devine penthouse. My thoughts loop between Paul and Costin. Paul, whose warmth feels like safety. Costin, whose darkness feels like an inevitability.

The driver stops in front of my building. Seconds after stepping out of the car, I can’t remember if I thanked him. The doorman holds open the door. I hear him saying my name, and I try to give an automatic answer. By the time I cross the penthouse lobby to step inside the elevator, my mind prickles with the weight of too many unanswered questions.

Why did the werewolves take Paul?

Why did Costin mesmerize me for so long?

Why didn’t Costin stop them? He’s a master vampire. Surely, he could have tracked and subdued werewolves.

What the hell am I going to do about it all?

The elevator’s soft chime as it opens feels like a death knell. I don’t get off until I see the doors starting to close, which prompts me into action. I reach between them, letting the doors bounce off my arm to reopen.

The penthouse is high above the city, with a wall of windows that display the many lights. At night, I like to stare down and imagine I’m looking at stars instead of streetlights and windows. There is a feeling of being removed from those below.

The house smells like cotton candy. I find it odd. My mother, Astrid, likes things a particular way. Our homes are always pristine. The paintings and sculptures are always in the same place. The furniture is unchanging. Since childhood, the only thing different in the penthouse has been the kitchen, which is modernized for our family’s chefs. I think Astrid likes the sense of control the sameness gives her.

Lorelei is my birth mother, but Astrid is married to my father and the only mother I’ve known. That makes Astrid Anthony’s mother by birth and mine by… well. Force? What do you call it when a man forces you to take care of his lovechild bastard? For me, Astrid is the woman I thought was my mother until I recently learned the truth.

I see the gray skyline muted by tinted windows. Costin’s eyes flash in my mind, and I hear his voice say, “ I will take care of you, Tamara. ”

The promise lingers, but so does the question. Why?

Anthony appears from the kitchen holding a tall glass filled with pink liquid. At twenty-nine, he’s a year older than me. His suit is as immaculate as ever, and there’s a looseness to his posture. My brother is all charms and smiles, even when he’s stressed. He’s learned to play his part in this family well. Everything is appearances and duty. It gleams on us like shiny varnish, lacquered over our smiling portraits to hide the canvas underneath. As the magical and legal heir, he hides more than I do. Expectations of the family mortal have always been low in comparison.

Anthony’s face lights up with relief as he approaches me through the living room. He gives me a once-over and smirks. “Nice hair.”

“What are you drinking? Unicorn piss?” I counter with a grimace. The smell of cotton candy is more pungent now that he’s near.

Anthony takes a sip and laughs. “The new chef had an emergency, so she sent a friend to stand in. Lady Astrid is going to lose her shit when she sees the kitchen. This new guy is making candy smoothies, candy chicken, candy I-don’t-know-what. Apparently, processed sugar is his food niche.”

“So, where have you been hiding, Tam-tam?” Anthony takes another sip of his drink.

“Nowhere.” I try to brush past him, but he blocks my path.

“Costin keeping you chained in his dungeon?” His smile never wavers, but that’s Anthony. Rarely do I see behind his facade.

I force myself to meet his gaze and keep my voice steady. “I’ve been recovering from all that happened.”

Anthony snorts. “Is recovering what they call kinky vampire action these days?”

I think of spending the week in bed, mesmerized. It’s not exactly the exciting time my brother is hinting at.

“Ah, come on, don’t look at me like that. If I had a hot boyfriend who looked like Costin, I’d never get out of bed.”

I arch a brow .

“I’m teasing,” he says with a wave of his hand. “Here, try this monstrosity.”

He thrusts the unicorn piss into my hand. I don’t want it. My stomach feels nauseous as it is.

“Honestly, where have you been?” he asks.

“I didn’t realize I was expected to report my every move.” I brush past him toward an end table to put the drink down.

“Oh, you’re not. But Astrid was worried.” The lie rolls out of him, but I know it for what it is. “You know how she gets when she’s worried. I, for one, enjoy having my head attached to my neck.”

I give him a bemused look. I highly doubt Astrid was worried about me.

“Fine. I was worried. You weren’t answering my calls,” he admits. “I thought maybe you got trapped underground in the supernatural city or got in a fight with Costin, and he left you stranded on top of the Eiffel Tower or something.”

“Eiffel Tower?” I shake my head at the absurdity. “Anthony, be?—”

“Speaking of drama,” he interrupts. His tone softens, the humor slipping just enough to reveal the concern beneath. “The Freemonts want a hearing before the council of elders. Apparently, you broke poor Chester’s heart when you called off your engagement. To hear them tell it, he’s inconsolable.”

I flinch to hear his name. Chester Freemont is a gross toad of a man. He only wanted to marry me to be connected to the Devine family.

“I’m sure the multitude of prostitutes he engages will bring him some comfort,” I grumble. “The only thing I broke of Chester’s is his pride, and that will quickly recover.”

Mabel Freemont carries a constant look of disdain, conveying a perpetual sense of superiority and ignorance. At the same time, Francis Freemont dominates conversations with loud, self-important bluster, recounting his wealth and business exploits that are only of interest to him. They made it clear they were doing me a favor by allowing me to marry their son. They announced it before the contracts were finalized.

“Though,” I continue, “I probably did break Uncle Mortimer’s heart. He had his sights set on the arranged marriage panning out.”

Uncle Mortimer has been pushing me toward Chester since I was a teenager.

Anthony laughs. “The look on Mortimer’s face when he heard you were with Costin was priceless. I doubt we see him at family dinner for a while. He’ll be too busy pouting about a master vampire dating a member of the elite Devine family. Oh, how the gossips have enjoyed spreading this one around.”

Anthony laughs harder.

I’m almost scared to ask. “What gossips? ”

“You really have been chained in a basement. The supernatural underground is buzzing. Everyone is talking about how you helped him defeat Draakmar?—”

“Helped?” I interrupt, annoyed. Of course everyone thinks I couldn’t do it on my own.

“—and now, with the alliance between Lord Constantine and our family, they speculate what this will mean for supernatural hierarchies. Astrid has been receiving visitors all week trying to get into her good graces in case this alliance becomes permanent.”

Permanent? For fuck’s sake, we just started dating. And I’m not sure I would call him a boyfriend right now.

“Elf bookies have laid odds on when Costin will turn you. Want to give me a heads up before I place?—”

I hit his arm. Hard. He suppresses a laugh and pretends like it hurts. “I’ll never agree to that. Lay odds on never in a million years.”

“Ow! You’re broody today. Care to share what’s going on in that head of yours? I was teasing. You’re not seriously considering a sunlight allergy, are you?” He reaches to push my hair out of the way to look at my neck for bites.

I swat him away.

“If that is the immortality you want, I’ll support you,” Anthony says. I see his serious eyes behind his fallen smile.

He looks like he wants to say more but doesn’t. Long ago, he’d promised me he would figure out a way to cure my mortality. It was a sweet gesture to make his little sister feel better at the time, but I think that promise has grown to mean something deeper. Conrad is dead. There are only the two of us Devine siblings left. Anthony doesn’t want to be left alone in our family for an eternity, and he knows I have an expiration date.

The expectations of Anthony as the oldest son and the only one to inherit the family magic must weigh upon him like an anchor pulling him deep into the abyss.

I know. I swim in that abyss.

I hesitate, my thoughts a tangled mess of Paul’s memory, Costin’s cryptic promises, and my spiraling doubts. “No. I don’t want to be a vampire.”

The idea of drinking blood for an eternity repulses me. Or at least it should. I tell myself it does.

He bumps my shoulder lightly. “Come on, Tam-tam. Give me something. You’ve got that ‘end of the world’ look again. What’s going on? Please tell me we don’t have to fight another dragon. I’m still a little stiff from the last battle.”

I touch my amulet. I sense Draakmar is resting. The even fall of his breathing calms me and makes me feel safe. It’s a strange sensation being tied to the ancient beast, and knowing any magic I have is not my own.

I let out a breath, trying to keep my voice steady. “It’s just... everything. The Freemonts, Costin, Draakmar and the prophecy, Conrad and the fire?—”

Anthony holds up a hand. “All the ingredients for a migraine. Got it.”

I feel the pressure closing in and imagine being back in the car with Paul, driving across the country, watching the hypnotic lines on the road. It had been easy to fall into a human routine and pretend this world didn’t exist.

“Let’s take a breath.” Anthony squeezes my arm in comfort. “Freemonts can kiss our asses. I, for one, am happy our families aren’t connected. The prophecy has been defeated. Thanks to you, Draakmar is again asleep, and the world is safe. No apocalypse. Conrad is dead, and after what he did, it’s normal to have mixed feelings about our brother. I loved him, too, but he tried to kill us and our parents. The important thing is that his angry spirit won’t hurt anyone ever again. You saw Leviathan intervene. The necromancer will keep our brother locked up tight. You need to put the past out of your head, or it will drive you insane. We have to focus on the present. ”

I still feel the lingering fear of Conrad’s ghost watching me. That’s the thing about ghosts—you don’t always know when they’re around.

“You’re right,” I say. “It doesn’t matter. I’m just having a mortality moment. We’ve been through a lot, you know?”

He studies me. “You don’t have to carry all this alone. I know you’re used to being treated like the delicate human in the family, and you think we don’t listen to your problems, but you’re still my sister. And you’re stuck with me, whether you like it or not. If there is a new problem, we’ll figure it out together. I know I haven’t always been there for you, but I’m here. Nothing is insolvable.”

His words loosen the knot in my chest, and for a fleeting moment, I’m grateful for his relentlessness. “Thanks.”

His grin returns full force. “Now, let’s figure out how to deal with the Freemonts without starting a supernatural war.”

I frown. “Do we need to do anything? They’ll bitch and moan, and then something else will come along to distract them. Zephronis withdrew his blessing. Do they really think the council will go against a great wizard’s decision?”

Even as I say it, I know that the pompous family probably does think they have a case.

“I don’t think we need to worry about the council right now. But if the Freemonts stir enough rumors and trouble, it will become a problem. Supernaturals can be gossipy bitches.”

“I’m sure our mother has a plan for fighting gossip,” I say.

“That does seem to be in Lady Astrid’s wheelhouse,” Anthony agrees. “We’ll table that problem. What else is going on?”

I am all too willing to stop talking about the Freemonts and change the subject. “I could use your help with?—”

The elevator dings, and our mother glides into the penthouse. The click of Astrid’s diamond-studded heels announces her presence. “Tamara, there you are.”

Her clipped tone doesn’t reek of motherly concern. I don’t answer as I wait for her to continue.

“Is the thing with Costin still happening?” she asks before sniffing the sickly sweet air and wrinkling her nose. She waves her hand in front of her face as if to brush away the offensive odor. “You’re not eating candy, are you?”

She looks pointedly at me.

“No,” I say.

“No, you’re not seeing Constantine?” she demands.

I can tell she hopes I got the vampire out of my system. Telling her my relationship status is “it’s complicated” isn’t a good option. Besides, it’s not like I’d go to Astrid for relationship advice. So I simply answer, “Yes, I’m seeing Costin. No, I’m not eating candy.”

I look at Anthony’s pink drink. My brother never gets interrogated about his diet. That honor is all mine.

“Very well. I suppose we need to have Costin and his sister over sometime soon.” She talks more to herself than to us, her fingers tracing the edge of her book. “We’ll need a new blood supply sent to the country estate. I hate dealing with the New York blood banks, but it can’t be helped.” She pauses, studying me. “There are eight million people in this city, and the banks act like they can’t just go out and get more blood.”

“I hear the homeless population doesn’t mind donating for cash and a meal,” Anthony suggests, suppressing his grin to hide the fact he’s teasing her. “Want me to invite?—?”

“We can’t serve a master vampire hobo blood from a back alley.” Astrid misses the joke.

“I’ll call the banks for you,” Anthony offers.

Astrid starts to nod before frowning. “No. The last time you ordered enchanted blood, I had vampire bats sleeping in every dark corner of the house for a month. I’ll take care of it. ”

I share a smirk with my brother. It wasn’t an accident. He thought it was hilarious.

“What is your hair?” Astrid furrows her brow.

I automatically lift my hands to touch the wayward curls.

“Fix,” Astrid waves her hands to encompass me, “all of this.”

“That’s the newest trend,” Anthony comes to my defense. “You don’t like it? It’s been in all the magazines.”

Astrid frowns at him but, instead of answering, asks me, “Is Costin currently speaking to his sister, Elizabeth?”

I give a light shrug. Not that anyone would remember since the amulet’s magic had erased and reset that timeline, but Elizabeth had tried to kill me in that version of events. I can still feel her cold hands on my body and see the death in her gaze. She’s not like Costin. I felt an evil in her that I don’t feel with her brother. “I don’t think you need to invite her.”

“Find out for sure,” Astrid says. “There is a fine etiquette to these things. We must handle ourselves above reproach. Everyone is watching after that Freemont debacle. Francis and Mabel are spreading their venom to anyone who will listen.”

“What now?” Anthony asks.

“According to Mabel, they are now the ones who called it off because we’re socially deficient. They’re accusing us of everything from sabotage, unpaid debts, whispering during the opera.” Astrid’s smile is all teeth. “They want us bleeding from all angles.”

The weight in my chest tightens. More Devine drama. More pressure. “Let them talk. It’s all lies. They can’t prove anything.”

Astrid chuckles wryly. “This isn’t just idle gossip. All eyes are on us. We need to be at our best.”

I nod, as expected. “Of course.”

“Just talk to your vampire. I need a guest list,” she says.

I nod again.

“Now, why does my home smell like a carnival’s unwashed backside?” She saunters off toward the kitchen without another word.

“Bye, mom,” I mumble sarcastically after her. “Thanks for the pep talk.”

Anthony lifts his hand and counts down with his fingers. Before he gets to one, we hear Astrid screech in horror. She starts screaming at the chef about the candy concoctions.

Anthony laughs and hooks his arm around my shoulder, quickly leading me away from the scene. “Don’t worry about our mother. She’s only happy when she’s unhappy.”

“I think she’s sad.” I don’t know what makes me say it. No one would agree with that opinion. Astrid is one of the strongest people I know, but her cold demeanor contrasts with subtle moments of vulnerability… real subtle moments . She believes in duty and tradition over emotions. I’ve come to realize that isn’t to say she doesn’t have emotions. They’re just buried under centuries of repression.

“I think your boyfriend drained too much blood. You’re delusional.” Anthony pulls me faster as Astrid’s yelling about dietary plans becomes more intense. We move through the penthouse toward our bedrooms. “You were starting to say you needed my help with something before we were interrupted.”

“Oh, I was just going to ask if Peter was still living in the city,” I answer.

“Peter?” Anthony arches a brow. “Werewolf Peter?”

I nod, trying to ignore the way Draakmar stirs at the mention of werewolves.

“Yeah, he still has an apartment here, but he’s been acting strange lately. Even for a wolf. Why? Are you tired of the vampire already? Want to try a little fur coat instead?” he teases, but there’s tension beneath his humor.

I think about jolting him in the stomach. “I’m not interested in dating Peter.”

“I’m still not going to tell him that. Gotta leave the poor pup some hope.” Anthony grins. “He had the biggest crush on you when you were in high school.”

High school was a private tutor. I don’t point that out.

“He practically begged to come home with me at each school break,” Anthony continues.

The last thing I need in my life is another love interest. I’m full up on those.

“You’re not laughing.” Anthony studies me, and I can’t avoid his eyes.

“I’m trying to figure out…” I look at my palm. “Do you remember when we were kids, and you let me hold that fireball?”

“You know I remember that. We were all playing that stupid game, trying to hit Peter with magic. I gave you the fireball, and you took off screaming into the forest. I was sure our parents were going to kill me when they found out. When I caught up to you, Costin had found you.”

“He’s always been there, lurking in the shadows,” I say, still tracing my hand. I can feel the memory of his cool fingers against the burn.

“He and our grandfather were good friends. I never thought about it too much, but I guess looking back, knowing the prophecy of the amulet, it’s not surprising.” He pulls me closer and places his arm over my shoulders. “Who would have thought my baby sister would save the world from a fiery apocalypse? I suppose that’s as good a reason as any for Costin to lurk around. Better than any alternative motives.”

“He was never inappropriate when I was a kid,” I assure Anthony. “I don’t think he wants to like me. I get the sense he’d rather not. I think his promise to help me through the prophecy is the only reason he came around.”

“Don’t sell yourself short. You inherited the Devine charm. You’re a catch. He’s lucky you gave him the time of day.”

I arch a brow at him but don’t comment on his teasing. “I know Costin is dangerous, but I’ve never feared him until...”

“What did he do?” Magic flares around my brother’s hand.

I touch Anthony’s arm to calm him. “It’s complicated.”

“Did he hurt you?”

I shake my head. “I’m having a hard time thinking clearly.”

Anthony extinguishes the magic, and I watch smoke trail up toward the ceiling like the last breath of a cigarette. “He mesmerized you?”

I nod. Out of everyone in my life, I feel like Anthony is closest to me. If you would have asked me a year ago, I would have said it was our brother Conrad. But Conrad betrayed me. His greed for power and money had been more driving than I could ever imagine.

“The whole time?”

I nod again.

“Why?”

Paul’s face appears unbidden in my mind.

“Paul remembers me,” I manage.

Anthony’s eyes widen and he waits for me to continue.

I try to clear my mind to explain. “Paul showed up while I was waiting for Costin and said his memories were returning. But before we got too much into it, werewolves abducted him off the sidewalk. Costin appeared right after and acted like he gave pursuit but then said he couldn’t track them.” I force a deep breath. “I think he is lying to me. I get this feeling he knows more. Before I could do something to help Paul, Costin mesmerized me for a week without asking my permission first.”

Anthony stares at me, giving a small nod to indicate he’s listening.

“I’m not accusing Costin of having something to do with the kidnapping, but I don’t think he was helping either. I don’t think he tried to find Paul.”

“Political balances between the werewolves and vampires are tenuous. I’m sure he’s just being cautious,” Anthony puts forth. It feels like he’s defending Costin, and I don’t like it .

“I think he might have mesmerized me out of jealousy to keep me from looking.” I try not to hang my head as I try to shake this last statement away. “Not that I think Costin would be jealous of me.”

Anthony smirks. “You don’t think?”

He’s making fun of me again. I cross my arms over my chest and grimace at him.

“You don’t think a master vampire will get jealous?” He starts laughing, and I force myself to keep frowning. “Tam, what do you think happens when a powerful, immortal king, who reigns over dark armies, believes Sir Human Lancelot is making eyes at his woman? You might not call that jealousy, but it’s definitely a sister emotion, and that family?—”

I hold up my hand in front of his face to stop him. My foggy brain is not functioning at one hundred percent. “That example had a lot of metaphors and words in it, but I think I get your point.”

“All vampires have a little narcissism in them,” he explains, like it’s actually news. “They’re undead predators needing blood to live. They’re used to taking what they want without permission, and if they don’t take what they want, nature will force them to take what they need. Of course he will be possessive of what he claims to be his. Of course he’s not going to ask permission. Vampires don’t ask permission, especially not from humans. ”

“I was raised in this family, but you all act like you think I’m two paces behind,” I mutter.

Anthony ignores my surliness. “That’s my point. You chose a vampire, Tam. A master vampire. You can’t pretend to be surprised when he acts like a vampire.”

He does have a point. I don’t like it.

“Now, tell me about Paul…” My brother smiles, and I hear the need for drama in his tone. “All of his memories are back?”

“When we fixed the amulet, it reversed the spell. He remembers both timelines, like me. His daughter doesn’t, as far as I know. She’s in Kansas City with her grandparents.”

Anthony frowns. “Who’s looking after their dog?”

After their memories were erased, Paul bought a dog for his daughter. I’m a little ashamed I didn’t think of the animal before now. I shake my head. “I don’t know.”

“I’ll send someone to check,” Anthony says. “Poor little guy.”

“You don’t know where Paul lives,” I answer.

“I don’t?” He gives a small laugh.

“You do?”

His grin widens. “I was curious after I heard what happened between the two of you. I might have looked him up. ”

“Thank you. Yes.” I run my fingers into my hair, and they tangle. “I should take a shower.”

“What about Peter? Want me to set up a date—I mean, meeting?”

“Yes, please. I need to see if he knows anything about who took Paul and why.” I don’t want to get my hopes up. Peter isn’t exactly in the top echelon of his werewolf pack, but he’s the only werewolf I’ve met who doesn’t scare the shit out of me. He’s my only lead in this supernatural mess and possibly my only chance to find answers about Paul’s disappearance.

“On it, Tam-tam.” Anthony gives a slight bow as he steps backward down the hall. “You can count on me.”

I retreat to my bedroom, the frustration of drifting for the last week still clings to my thoughts. I lock the door and lean against it, slowly exhaling. It’s daylight. Costin won’t show up until after dark—if he is going to show. He didn’t stop me from leaving.

Stay here.

I hear his voice whispering in my head as if, even now, he’s influencing my thoughts.

Costin is hiding something. I feel it. He’s always been secretive and too controlled. He says the right things, but what’s behind those words?

My hand drifts to my neck, where the amulet feels like both a curse and a blessing. Its protection has come at a tremendous personal cost. Part of me wants to take it off and smash it again, but I worry that will cause Draakmar to wake up. I can’t go through all of that again.

I take a deep breath and begin to undress. I’ve chosen Costin— or so I keep telling myself —but why can’t I shake the feeling that Paul isn’t exactly a thing of the past?