Page 49

At the end of the day when it was time for everyone to leave, I realized that Nathan was nowhere to be found. I walked down the stairs expecting to see him but the only person I saw was Miles.

I checked my phone to be sure that there were no missed texts from him but there was nothing. At this point I was completely confused and not sure of how I was supposed to move forward .

Miles had already stepped out of the office and I followed him only to be absolutely dumbfounded when I got to my car. Resting on the back seat was a bouquet of flowers. They were small blue flowers but I didn’t recognize them.

I have never actually received flowers in my life and looking at it tugged at just the right heartstrings.

Out of the corner of my eye, I could see Miles smiling softly but I could barely even pay attention to him. I gently picked up the bouquet only to see a little note fall out of it.

At first, I wanted to get you daisies. I have a personal attachment to them because my mother loved them so much. We had a little bed of daisies growing up and I remember her going out every morning to watch them bloom at dawn.

But then, I saw these and my first thought was something was wrong because I couldn’t smell a thing. Then the florist explained that they’re called forget-me-nots and they have basically no scent at all.

It just felt perfect because this way you’re not exactly missing out on much. It can smell to you whatever you want it to.

In that one moment, I had a new favorite flower. I wanted to imprint the moment and the card to memory. I read it over and over again until I could practically recite it by heart and the entire time, Miles was driving silently.

I looked up and realized that we weren’t going to my house, “You know where he is, don’t you?”

“I’ve been sworn to secrecy.” That was as much of an admission as I was going to get from him .

Miles stopped the car in front of a familiar building and I shook my head to myself as a small smile played on my lips. I should have known that Nathan would have something like this up his sleeve.

I stared at the large sign that read Angels Café and I resisted the urge to scoff slightly. I saw him walk out of through the doors and he made his way over to me. He opened the door for me and when he saw that I held the flowers in my hands, he smiled.

“Nice flowers,” I said as I reluctantly put them down so he could help me out of the car.

“I’m glad you liked them.”

“Where’s your car?”

“At home,” when I looked at him quizzically he sighed, “Ubers are a thing.”

I heard Miles get out of the car too and to my surprise he handed my keys to Nathan. Nathan put them in his pocket and with a tip of his head; Miles turned down the road and started to walk away, presumably home.

I turned to Nathan with a raised brow and instead of responding, he led me in through the doors of the busy café. It wasn’t as full as it usually is but it was still bustling with people. Nathan and I walked right past everyone and towards a booth at the far corner of the café.

“Why here?’ I asked as soon as we took our seats, “Other than the fact that this is where I was coerced into agreeing to the documentary.”

“You weren’t coerced, your pride just got in the way.” I rolled my eyes mainly because I knew he was right. “It was how we officially met. ”

“We met when you spilled your coffee and your beer on me.”

He chuckled under his breath, “I thought we agreed to wipe the slate clean.”

“You said you would build over it,” The corner of his lips quirked as he realized that I did remember the conversation.

“Then allow me build over it, sunshine.” As he spoke, I noticed someone staring at us out of the corner of my eye. I started to turn but he grabbed my wrist and stroked my palm softly. “Ignore them.”

“Why did you choose here? It’s as public as it gets. I would’ve thought that you would have gotten a five star restaurant on speed dial.”

“If that’s what you want then I can,” he retorted and I fell silent. “The thing is, I don’t think that’s what you want. If you go there, you have to pretend all night. You can’t laugh too loud and you can’t curse like the sailor that you are.”

“Fuck you,” He shot me a look as if to say ‘this is what I’m talking about’.

“Before the town, when was the last time you just sat down and had a coffee or a burger like a normal person? You didn’t care about who was watching or what they were saying. It was just you, in a café or a restaurant that didn’t have ratings in some messed up magazine.”

I wanted to say that it was the night before the show when he dragged me out of the office while I was working late.

I wanted to tell him that the only time I have felt like I didn’t have to pretend was when I was with him.

But the words wouldn’t come out, my lips couldn’t form them and my tongue couldn’t speak them.

“I don’t have the luxury of doing that,” I said instead, “Everyone is watching and waiting and holding their breaths for me to fail. I’m determined to let them suffocate.”

“You’re the one suffocating because you can’t be who you are.”

I hated that he was right. I hated that he could see right through me like I was some piece of transparent glass. I hated that he knew and it frustrated me to no end because I thought I hid things very well. It’s either I’m not as good as I thought or he is better than I thought.

“That wasn’t very nice,” I decided to downplay the entire situation.

“If you wanted nice sunshine, you wouldn’t be here.” I rolled my eyes and bit my tongue to stop myself from saying anything stupid. “All I ask is that for one night, don’t be Adira.”

“I can’t magically stop being myself Nathan. I can’t just exit my body and enter someone else’s.” I folded my hands over my chest. “If there was a way to do that, believe me I would have found it by now.”

He rubbed his pointer finger and thumb over his head in faux frustration and I resisted the urge to laugh.

“Do you always have to take things literally?” he asked and I shrugged with a small smile. “Humor me for one night.”

“Fine, but all I know is how to be Adira. If I’m not her then who am I?”

“Easy; you’re sunshine.”

It wasn’t easy for me to detach myself from my surroundings or the thoughts and the worry but by the time I managed to do it, I found myself having more fun than I’ve had in a very long time. I’m not going to admit it to him or anything like that but I think he already knows.

We had hot chocolate and croissants but we spent most of our time talking.

He told me what it was like growing up and he spoke so fondly about his parents.

We had vastly different upbringings but if there was one thing we had in common, it was how grateful we were to our parents for supporting the things we loved.

From the way he spoke about his mum, I felt like I knew her. She was kind and loving and I had to ask how he turned out the way he did to which he just rolled his eyes.

Time seemed to fly by while we were there and before I knew it, he was driving me back home. I didn’t want the night to end and as soon as he stopped in front of my house I found myself turning to him.

“Would you like to come in?”