Page 51 of Awestruck (Starstruck Love Stories #4)

Chapter Thirty

Elliot

Even after she’s gone, I can’t stop staring at the door that shut behind her, blocking her from view.

That conversation couldn’t have gone any worse if I’d tried.

“Elliot.”

I reluctantly tear my eyes from the door to face Queen Ingrid, who smiles sadly at me, like she can see right through my armor to my raw heart underneath.

“How are you? Really?”

“Healing,” I reply. While that’s true physically, it’s going to be a long time before I can feel good about convincing Freya to choose Grimstad. That was never my plan, but the words kept spilling from my mouth. It’s not like I really expected her to make a different decision. I just…hoped.

“We have not had a chance to properly thank you for keeping our little girl safe.,” Stellan says, and tears form in his eyes.

“You protected her with your life,” Ingrid adds. “As you promised. For that we owe you so much.”

I drop my chin. “You don’t owe me anything. I was doing my job.”

“We all know she is more than a job to you, Elliot.”

Though afraid of what I’ll find, I lift my gaze to Ingrid and feel something in me settle when I look at her.

For the first time, she seems to have let her guard down and is fully letting me see the emotions she always keeps hidden, and her expression is one I’ve never seen directed at me. It’s…motherly.

I was prepared to defend myself and refute any accusations that I crossed a line with Freya, one I shouldn’t have even come close to. But this? I don’t know what to do with this.

Ingrid tilts her head. “I wondered, after all the pictures, but I knew for sure when you spoke well of the union with Grimstad. You love her.” It’s not a question.

I shake my head anyway. “I can’t love her.”

“Why not?” Stellan asks.

Staring at him, I pull my eyebrows low. “I’m an American.”

“Unfortunately,” Ingrid says with a small smile. “But Americans have feelings, yes?”

“Feelings don’t overwrite laws.”

The queen’s eyes travel over me. “I did not expect you to think so small, Elliot.”

I don’t know what she means by that, but I have another argument ready. “She picked Grimstad.”

“Did she?” Stellan looks at his wife thoughtfully.

“Yes,” I practically growl. “She did.”

“She gave in too easily,” Ingrid says.

“Easily?” I scoff, staring at the pair of them like I’m seeing them for the first time.

They may be a king and queen, but they’re really just flawed human beings like everyone else.

“You think any of that was easy for her? She’s only had time to think about the proposal for a week, on top of figuring out a campaign she wasn’t prepared for, all to try to earn the one thing she’s wanted her whole life, and then someone goes and shoots at her and reminds her that until she has an heir, the entire way of life for her country is at risk unless one of your sons sacrifices his life the way she did, which she would never expect them to do because she’s the most selfless person I’ve ever known. ”

Suddenly her voice is in my head, words spoken in a whisper that made me feel more alive than I had in over a year when she first spoke them.

Let me have this moment for myself. Seconds before she asked me to kiss her.

The one time she was selfish, and she went above and beyond, stealing my heart from my chest and refusing to give it back.

“Freya’s not going to change her mind,” I say when neither monarch responds to my rant. Surely they know that.

My phone buzzes, and I slip it from my pocket to see a text from Derek, asking if I can meet him at the outer gates.

Either he found something or he has a plan, and the distraction will be nice.

Maybe I’ve lost the love of my life, but there’s a good chance I’m gaining a brother through all of this.

Sighing, I return my focus to Ingrid and Stellan. “She made her choice. Now I have to make mine.”