Page 11 of Aug

NINE

Inebriated Ti.

Emotional Ti.

Sensitive Ti.

Spoiled Ti.

Sleepy Ti.

Sober Ti.

Strict Ti.

Sexy Ti.

It didn’t matter her mode, I was enamored by every version of Tiana I’d met. I couldn’t help myself from laughing as I watched her body hang halfway out of the SUV as she sang the lyrics of SZA.

“That’s me, Miss Twenty-Something! Ain’t got nothing. Running from love. Wish you were here.”

“Ti–” I called out to her.

“Stuck in them twenty-somethings. Stuck in them twenty-somethings.”

I pulled on her dress, hoping to keep her inside of the car. My fear of her falling out was real, which was why I was going only twelve miles an hour as we hit the bends.

“Ti– baby, don’t fall out or I’m going to have to beat the fucking ground up.”

“Good luck on them twenty-somethings. Good luck on them twenty-somethings. God bless them twenty-somethings.”

Finally, she sat down.

“Hopin’ my twenty-somethings won’t end. Hoping to keep the rest of my friends.”

Her voice cracked as her emotions began to swell. I watched as her mood changed and sadness crept in her space.

“Praying the twenty-somethings don’t kill me. Kill me.”

No more words followed. There were only tears and plenty of them. Somehow, I wished I could take away whatever pain she was experiencing. I lowered the volume on the radio as we entered the gates. Silently, I shut off the engine and made my way around to Tiana’s side.

When I opened the door, her arms collapsed around me. She’d come close to death. I’d never understand her pain or the trauma her experience caused. But, I would do everything in my power to make sure she never faced that level of misfortune again.

“Hey– hey–”

“I’m sorry. I just– sometimes it all comes rushing back.”

“And that’s fine. I’m here. Cry when you need to cry. Yell when you need to yell. Fuss when you need to fuss. Quiet when you need to quiet. Hurt when you need to hurt. You’re in good hands, Ti. I’ve come as I am and I want you to understand you can do the same.”

She cleared her face and then rested her head on my chest.

“You smell divine.”

“Come on. Let me get you inside. It’s about to rain.”

The clouds had begun to roar. Nature was layering its fragrance with each passing minute. Tiana smelled me and all I smelled was the rain.

“Can we stay out just a little while?”

“We can do whatever you want.”

“I want you to show me to the garden. The place you get my roses. I want to take in its beauty and thank those bushes for lending me a piece of their love.”

One by one, I slipped her shoes off her feet. She wouldn’t be getting very far in those. She’d done well for the night, keeping them strapped to her ankles. She could unwind now. She could relax. She was with me.

Her man.

Her confidant.

Her comfort zone.

I took Tiana by the hand and turned around. She climbed onto my back.

Wham.

The door slammed behind us as I led her toward the garden I’d visited far too many times to count. It was Balle’s favorite part of her home. She spent hours on end in the greenhouse some evenings.

Meditating.

Reading.

Relaxing.

Sleeping.

Tending to the plants inside that required an enclosure .

Through the well-manicured lawn, past the tennis court, past the outdoor theater, alongside the handmade pond, I trekked, ending in the maze of a garden that I considered a sacred gem.

I lowered Tiana to the ground. She held her dress in one hand and laced our fingers with the other.

“The night still feels so young.”

I listened as she poured out her thoughts.

“And, this place is so magical. Right in Rome’s backyard.”

“Tell me your story, Ti.”

Curiosity determined my words.

“Born into a two-parent home. Became obsessed with Black ballerinas after I got my first music box. Inside was a brown face, brown arms, brown legs, and a leotard. Around and around it spun. Music played but all I could see was the little figure. I knew that I’d be able to twirl just like that one day.

When I became of age, my mother signed me up for ballet.

“I’ve been perfecting my craft since. Five years ago, I joined Huff Theater of Clarke. A year ago, I was poisoned and my system shut down completely. I ended up in a coma. During those months, I stayed in bed alone every day, wishing someone… anyone could hear me screaming to be freed from my body.

The loneliness nearly made me give up. Give out.

I hated the thought of waking up mentally but still sleeping physically.

I couldn’t escape. No matter how hard I tried.

Til this day, I hate sleeping alone. I hate the idea of being alone.

I struggle with my own company. It reminds me of those months spent in that bed. Just existing, barely.”

I listened, not passing judgment but taking note of her struggles.

“I’m sorry that happened to you, Ti. You didn’t deserve that. I’ll kill everything moving if something happens to you. You’re safe now.”

“I know,” she sighed, leaning in. “But, I still feel lonely some days.”

“I’m working on that.”

“It’s not your issue, Aug.”

“I’m making it my issue.”

“Where was God keeping you?” She asked. “Why didn’t I meet you sooner?”

“Because I wasn’t ready. He knew it and so did I.”

“Perfect timing, huh?”

“Perfect timing.”

I tipped my head toward the roses.

“So this is where magic happens?”

“This is it.”

Astounded, Tiana rounded the bush.

“Beautiful.”

“Just like you, Ti.”

I didn’t keep my thoughts to myself. I let them loose. The smile on her face let me know I’d made the right decision.

“If I tell you a secret, do you promise to keep it?” She whispered, peeking around as if we weren’t alone.

“I promise.”

“I’ve been wondering lately– if the feelings I have for you are real– or if you’re even real.

Because, this can’t be happening so fast and so well and so beautifully and so pleasantly and so intentionally.

I’m so afraid I will fall face first once reality hits and the rug is pulled from beneath me. ”

“There’s no rug, Tiana. And, this is real. It’s as real as those roses and the rain that is about to fall onto your pretty skin at any second.”

“Then, why does it feel too good to be true?”

She closed her eyes and grimaced as if the words were painful to recite. Her chest deflated. Physically, she was here, but mentally, she was elsewhere.

“You’re not there anymore. You’re not in that hospital bed. You’re not alone. And, someone hears you. Hears your heart. I can’t convince you that I’m perfect and I won’t ever try to. But, I will spend the rest of my life helping you understand that you are– for me at least.

“Just as you are. Afraid. Scared. Lonely. Traumatized. And, struggling with whatever it is you struggle with. Because, we’re going to work through it, Ti. All of it. My shit and yours.”

I pulled her toward the bench just a few feet from the roses she hardly wanted to tear her eyes away from. I was the first to sit. Tiana settled on my lap.

“I want you here more often. If being alone bothers you, then I don’t want you alone more often than you have to be.”

“I don’t want to crowd your space.”

“None of that matters, Tiana. I’m inviting you into my space. It’s better that way. I can do my job and keep you from feeling anything but joy to some degree. When you get tired of me or need a break, you can return to your crib. It doesn’t matter to me. My door will always be open for you.”

Tiana’s hands flattened against my cheeks. Her lips met mine. Her tongue parted them.

“I’m ovulating,” she explained, again.

Chuckling, I nodded.

“You don’t have to give me an explanation, baby. This motherfucker is yours for the taking.”

Droplets of rain began to fall as Tiana stood up. I stood with her, loosening my belt. Halting my progress, I grabbed ahold of the end of her dress and pulled upward, removing it from her body completely.

Her smooth brown skin was tantalizing. Rain cascaded onto her. Onto us. With my pants at my ankles, I sat on the bench and pulled Tiana down onto me. Her legs parted as she climbed my tree. Both feet were planted on the bench, one on each side of me.

My right hand gripped her neck, bringing her closer as she lowered her pussy onto me. Her small hand wrapped around my tool, guiding it into her slipperiness. She was a fucking pool, much wetter than the rain coming down on us.

Brown areolas stared me in the face. Hard nipples protruded, making the rain roll off her skin and onto my thighs. Jealous of its closeness, I took the left nipple into my mouth. I rolled the right one between my fingers.

“Uhhhhh–”

Silencing her cries wasn’t the plan. I wanted her to let it all go. Everything she was holding onto. I needed her to hand that shit to me. I could carry her load. Every load. Any load. I had the shoulders to bear the weight. She didn’t need the extra weight.

“Baby…”

Her whimpers were sunlight in the rain.

“Yessssss…”

I wanted every hardship she’d ever faced to dissolve with each stroke.

“Auggggg–”

I couldn’t bear the thought of hurting her. I wanted to learn to love and then love harder and harder. Just for her. Just because of her.

“Uhhhh–”

I loosened my grip on her breasts and gripped her waist. From below, I began to drill into her. Those tiny, round nipples bounced up and down each time I hit rock bottom. I caught her right nipple in my mouth and tried extracting milk from her ducts.

“Yesssss. August–”

I’m here now.

Her body between my fingers felt inevitable. This is where we were both meant to be. Together. Entangled. Enriched. Enchanted. Enamored.

The rain picked up and so did Tiana’s pace. Her body moved with ease. She was so fluid. So flawless. So fucking sexy.

I felt my nut rising. I was hardly ready to end my time inside of her warmth. Reluctantly, I lifted her from my dick and planted her feet on the ground.

“Bab–”

Her words were cut short as I stood, turning her around, and forced her hands on the wet bench. Within seconds, I was back at home.

“Uhhhhhhhhh yesssssss.”