Page 22 of An Earl Most Inconvenient (Regency Mishaps #2)
CHAPTER 22
T he final evening of the house party had finally arrived, and Tristan stood on the terrace, looking out at the garden. All the effort he had put into planning everything to the very last detail, and all the hard work of his servants, had not gone to waste. The garden had been transformed into a dazzling spectacle of twinkling fairy lights and fragrant blooms. The air was alive with the soft melodies of a string quartet, and laughter floated on the gentle breeze, mingling with the scent of roses and jasmine. Guests strolled along the winding pathways, their gowns and cravats swaying in time with the music. Everything was perfect. His plans had all come to fruition, and the dancing had not even begun yet. This was to be the highlight of the evening, especially for the younger guests.
But nevertheless, as he observed the scene in front of him, he felt unsettled. He had not been able to find a moment’s peace since the night he had kissed Diana in the garden, and even now, as his grand party was drawing to a close, he found that he could not drag his thoughts away from the memory of that night.
And there she was now, standing on the other side of the garden. She was talking, of course, to Lord Anthony, and her face was illuminated by the soft glow of lanterns. Her beauty struck him like a bolt of lightning. The delicate fabric of her gown clung to her figure in a way that made his heart race, while her hair cascaded in soft curls, framing her face perfectly. She looked ethereal, like a goddess gracing the earth, and he found it impossible to look away.
Tristan’s mind raced with thoughts of what had happened between them in the garden two nights’ previously. Since then, he had scarcely slept. What had happened between him and Diana haunted him in a way that he could scarcely describe, even to himself. Even when he stole a few hours’ sleep, he woke feeling restless. And now, as he watched her with Lord Anthony, he wanted to race across the lawn and grab her by the hand. His whole body tingled with the urge to touch her again. He almost had to will his legs to stay still, rather than carrying him across the garden towards her, against his will.
They had barely spoken in the days that had passed since that fateful night. The tension that had simmered between them seemed to have given away to a fragile truce. He had been a fool, allowing jealousy and pride to cloud his judgment in the first place, and then allowing his passion to overtake him. His actions had been beyond inappropriate, but he could not bring himself to regret them, even though he knew that as a gentleman, he should. But she had been so intoxicating to him, he had been unable to resist.
But he had made the right decision, he told himself. He repeated the words in his head, over and over again. There was no hope of happiness with Diana. They were too different, and anyway, she clearly despised him. He would marry Lady Grace, and she would make the perfect countess. He would do what everyone expected of him, and all would be well.
With a deep breath, he resolved to approach Lady Grace instead. He would ask her for a dance, and then he would try to find an opportunity to speak to her properly about their future. He would marry her, after all, wouldn’t he? He told himself that this had been his plan all along, and he would stick to it. His feelings for Diana had to be put aside, ignored; she felt nothing for him, he was sure of it. Only disdain and disapproval, no matter what the look in her eyes told him when they were alone together.
None of that mattered, though. He repeated the thought over and over in his mind, as he made his way through the crowd, weaving between guests. But as he reached Grace, he found her engaged in conversation with a group of friends, laughter dancing in her eyes.
“Lady Grace,” he began, his heart pounding with anticipation, “may I have the honor of a dance?”
Grace turned to him, her face brightening. “Oh, My Lord, thank you so much for asking. But I have promised the next dance to another gentleman who asked me a little while ago. It would be rude to turn him down now, I think?” She smiled sweetly at him. “Perhaps you should ask Diana instead? I think that she is not engaged for the next dance, and you two are on much better terms now, aren’t you?”
Tristan raised an eyebrow in response to her words. Her distance from him was unmistakable now, and he was not quite sure what to make of it. Was she simply trying to further entrance him, by pretending not to care? Or was it simply the case that she did not love him? He frowned. It did not matter to him a jot if she did not love him, he told himself. He had never intended to marry for love. He was looking for a suitable countess, nothing more and nothing less.
He wondered for a moment, as he drew away from Grace and her group of friends, if she was in fact not simply encouraging him to dance with Diana; she was subtly pushing them together. Perhaps her feelings for him had shifted, if in fact she had ever felt anything real towards him at all? And maybe now she was trying to gently distance herself from him? But surely she would not be trying to push him closer to Diana?
The whole situation confused him, and he remembered in that moment that alongside everything else, he was the host tonight, and he had to show the best side of himself to his guests. He could not allow himself to be lost down a rabbit hole of confusion and doubt. He was the Earl of Silvermere, hosting a grand garden party to close the gathering that had been taking place on his estate for the past few days, and he must hold his nerve and keep his focus. Everyone expected him to behave in a certain way, and he did not want to let anyone down.
He approached Lady Diana, who was speaking with Cecilia. Her laughter rang through the air like a sweet melody, and he almost did not want to draw attention to himself or to interrupt.
But Cecilia spotted him and smiled. “Tristan! Come and join us!” she said.
“I have come, in fact, to ask Lady Diana if she would care to dance,” he ventured. He was trying to sound nonchalant, despite his racing heart, but he suspected that he was not succeeding.
Diana glanced at him in surprise and he saw the beginnings of a blush starting to creep up her cheeks. The memory of their kiss was still fresh in his mind, and he wondered if she too was thinking of it now as she looked at him.
Her eyes flickered with uncertainty. “I—well, I suppose I could.”
“Diana, do you not want to dance?” Cecilia said, an incredulous note in her voice. “I thought that you would jump at the chance. And now that Tristan is to be your brother-in-law, it is most fitting that you should dance together.”
Tristan winced. Everyone was speaking of his marriage to Grace as if it was a certainty, but no one seemed to realize that he had not yet proposed, and in fact he was not even now sure that he wanted to, or even if Grace would accept him if he did so. But now, in the middle of the throng of guests, was not the time to start debating these points with his sister.
“Very well,” Diana said. There was still a note of hesitance in her voice, but she took his offered hand, and he led her to the dance floor. He felt a tingle in his fingers as they met with hers. It was just a dance, though, he told himself. A friendly dance with the woman who was to be his sister-in-law. Nothing more than that. The dance floor, laid out on the lawn, really was a most impressive sight. He was glad, then, that he had ensured there was an opportunity for dancing at the end of the party. He found himself appreciating the moment as much as his other guests seemed to be doing.
Anticipation crackled through the air, and the music began, he placed an arm around Diana’s waist, then extended his other hand towards hers. She placed her delicate fingers in his, and he felt a jolt of warmth travel through him at the touch of her hand. The musicians played a lively waltz, and they began to dance.
Tristan could not help but marvel at the way they seemed to fit together, their movements syncing effortlessly. He could feel the tension between them melting away, replaced by a lightness that filled his heart.
“You look very beautiful tonight, Lady Diana,” he said, his voice low and sincere. He knew that he probably should not say such things to her, but he found, as he looked at her and held her in his arms, that he could not help himself. He only spoke the truth, after all.
“Thank you, My Lord,” she replied, a shy smile gracing her lips. “You look rather fine yourself.”
He chuckled at her response. It was incredible how, in spite of everything, they seemed able to fall into easy banter together. It was an unusual sensation, to say the least, and he felt himself beginning to relax. Under the surface, his mind was churning, but outwardly, he remained calm and light-hearted. “Do you mean to say that I can, on occasion, look presentable? You are usually so stern with me, My Lady.”
“Only on occasion,” she said, her eyes sparkling as she twirled away before returning to his embrace. “It is a shame that the rest of your wardrobe does not reflect such potential.” There was a glint in her eye as she spoke, but he wondered if there was perhaps something a little forced in her voice. Perhaps he was imagining it, though.
He was enjoying the way that she was teasing him, and he could not help but continue in the same vein. “Ah, but I have a secret,” he said, leaning closer. “I remember how much you liked my orange cravat. You noticed it particularly, if I recall the moment correctly. But I must confess to you, that I wear these clothes only to keep the attention away from how utterly charming I truly am.”
Diana rolled her eyes, but laughter escaped her lips. “You are insufferable, My Lord. I have said it before, and no doubt I will say it again.”
“And yet here you are, dancing with me,” he replied, a playful grin on his face.
“Here I am,” she replied. She held his gaze, and in that moment, the energy between them shifted. It was as if the music faded into the background, and all the shapes and colors of the garden blurred into one indistinct mass. He stared into her eyes, lost in an enchanting bubble of music and moonlight. She met his eye and there was a softness in her gaze that made his heart begin to melt.
“Lady Diana, you must be careful,” he said in a low voice. “You may find yourself enjoying my company more than you intended.”
Immediately he saw the change in her face, and felt her shoulders tense. She looked away, seeming now to be unable to meet his eye. They moved through the dance together, but the easy flow between them had gone. Her movements felt mechanical.
The waltz came to an end and Tristan led her to the edge of the dance floor, still holding her hand. As soon as they reached the lawn, though, she pulled her hand away, still not looking at him.
“Please, you must excuse me,” she murmured. “I am feeling unwell.” She turned and walked away from him without another word, leaving him standing stock still on the edge of the dance floor.
He watched as she fled across the lawn, his thoughts a mass of confusion again. In a tiny moment, everything had changed between them, and now he was left standing alone, once again struggling to make sense of his life and everything that was going on around him.
Diana pushed through the crowd, looking for a space where she could be alone with her thoughts. She had thought that she could pretend that everything was normal, and enjoy the playful banter with him, but in the moment when they had locked eyes, as they twirled and spun, she had felt her heart fluttering in a way she had not anticipated. Each touch of his hand sent shivers down her spine, and with every step, she felt closer to him, drawn into the warmth of his presence. Yet, as the rhythm of the dance continued, she had not been able to shake the feeling of dread that loomed over her—she was falling for the man who was courting her sister. The man who was going to marry her sister. Nothing he had said to her had given her any reason to believe that his plans had changed, and she knew, in that instant, that she had to get away from him.
And now, she leaned back against a tree on the far side of the garden, as far away from the other guests as she could manage to be without risking getting lost in the darkness, and all the thoughts that had been haunting her for days flooded back into her mind.
The situation was beyond complicated, and she felt torn between the feelings that surged within her and the loyalty she knew that she owed to her sister. What good was it now, indulging the way that she now knew that she felt about Tristan?
He was not a rake; she saw that now. He was a man with a difficult past, who had done his best to protect himself from the influences and pressures of others, and who had done his best to provide for his family. And in his choices when it came to looking for a wife, he had been careful too. Of course he had; his position dictated it. She saw it all now clearly, for what it was.
The look in his eyes, though, had been undeniable. She wondered if he felt something for her too, that there was something between them that was becoming impossible to deny. A connection that they could not escape from.
But escape from it she must. She had to accept the reality of the situation. She could not allow the feelings in her that he had stirred to begin to take root into something more serious. She had to put a stop to it, now. And if that meant putting some distance between herself and the earl, then that is what she would have to do.
She glanced back to see Tristan watching her, confusion and concern mingling in his gaze. Her heart ached at the sight, for she knew that she was running away from something that could have been real, in another scenario. But the thought of her sister, the loyalty she owed to her family, weighed heavily on her mind. She could not allow herself to fall for Tristan, not when it would mean shattering Grace’s heart and destroying her hopes of happiness.
With that thought, she slipped further into the shadows, seeking refuge from the whirlwind of emotions that threatened to engulf her. The night had been enchanting, but it had also opened a door to a world of feelings she was not ready to confront.
And as she leaned against the cool bark of the tree and listened to the leaves rustling above her head, she closed her eyes and whispered a silent prayer for strength. She needed to find a way to quell the feelings that had awakened within her, to push aside the allure of Tristan, the man who had captivated her heart.
But deep down, she knew the truth - her heart was already lost, and the more she tried to deny it, the more it would ache for him. But she could not give into it. She must be strong, and find a way through the mire.