Page 7

Leanna Avery

I watch Harriet run a brush through my wet hair. I’ve told her plenty of times I can do it myself, but she always insists on doing it. Her company is warm and soothing, so I’ve stopped protesting.

“I heard you and His Majesty were doing something in the garden yesterday,” she says, smiling at me in the mirror.

“I was trying to plant the seeds, but he wouldn’t let me dig the holes,” I tell her.

It has become easier to confide in Harriet over time. She’s always in my corner. She was the first person who was kind to me when I arrived here, and it may be silly, but I like to lean on her. I’ve never had an older female figure in my life, and I appreciate her presence.

“I was starting to get hot, so I took off my jacket. He was angry about that.”

“Was that all?” She gives me a smile, and I wring my fingers.

“Harriet, why does he call me Leanna?”

“Because it’s your name?” She chuckles slightly.

“Well, yes, but he once told me that I should forget my name and that he didn’t care what it was, so why does he care now?”

She sighs. “We all have burdens in life, Miss Leanna. Even the king carries his own. He’s always been driven by duty. Protecting this kingdom is the only thing he knows. You are the first woman in his life who has held any significance, and he initially resisted it. But the fated mate bond is a unique one. It doesn’t matter how much you resist. You two are meant for each other. Whatever he said to you upon your first meeting was spoken out of anger and a lack of trust. But you are slowly starting to make this place your home, and he can see that.”

“You mean, because I’ve been doing my duties, he’s begun to accept me?” This doesn’t make me feel any better.

She starts tying my hair in a loose braid. “I believe he is warming up to you. When he first met you, he probably did not understand how strong the fated mate bond truly is. But over time, he has begun to see you—not your title or who you once were, but you. And you’ve also changed. In a very short time, you’re no longer afraid to stand up to him.”

That’s true. I’ve become more confident around him. He’s always yelling and growling, but he never hits me. He has never behaved in any manner that makes me think he’s going to hurt me. That matters to me. “I don’t feel unsafe around him.”

“And you shouldn’t,” Harriet replies seriously. “Cedric will never hurt you. He’s not a cruel person.”

I don’t respond to that. I do believe that there is a very low chance of him physically harming me. But emotionally?

I’m scared of forming any kind of expectations when it comes to him. If I do and he then decides I’m not good enough for him, it will shatter me. There’s still a strange tension between us. He has contradicted everything he said to me in my first days here, so it is hard for me to trust him. Similarly, the people in this castle may have begun to warm up to me, but that doesn’t mean I trust them, either.

I’ve only ever known pain and suffering. Love and affection are strange concepts. A part of me is convinced that I am not worthy of them. I’m not supposed to be loved. I’m not good enough. I’m too scared to even consider it.

And it’s not as if Cedric goes around spouting out love confessions to me. He keeps turning up where I am and pushing me around, but not in a violent sort of way. He fusses over me and scolds me and growls at me. I’ve slowly become accustomed to his manner of speaking. When he talks to me, he’s more bark than bite.

I don’t know quite what to make of him. At night, he pulls me into his arms and holds me till I fall asleep to the beat of his heart. He will randomly take a lock of my hair and sniff it when he thinks I’m asleep. When I wake up, he’s wrapped around me so tight that I have to wake him up to let me go. He has started forcing me to have meals with him. It feels like he’s looking after me, but I can’t tell. When I got sick, did it scare him? Is that why he’s going out of his way for me?

Even if that is the case, why is he bothering?

I thought I was just a substitute. He said so. But he doesn’t treat me that way.

The castle’s decor is slowly being changed into a brighter one, one that I thought suited him. I keep waiting for the other shoe to fall and for him to tell me to stop wasting money, to remember my place, but he hasn’t said anything. His motivations worry me. My own reactions worry me.

I can’t seem to control my emotions around him. I have always tried to hold my tongue, to keep my thoughts to myself, but it’s nearly impossible when I’m around him. He provokes me in subtle ways, and I’m starting to believe that he enjoys my little outbursts. Or at least that he gets some satisfaction out of them.

He’s a strange man but brutally honest. I’m starting to realize that I prefer that.

A knock on the door startles me from my thoughts. “That must be Rothan.”

“I’ll go check.”

When Harriet opens the door, the person outside is not her son and my advisor, but somebody else.

Bella.

“Can I come in?” she asks begrudgingly. She doesn’t sound very happy, which makes me immediately tense up.

Harriet glances at me, and I nod.

Bella doesn’t look great. I haven’t seen her for quite a while. In fact, the last time I saw her was when Cedric was ordering my dresses. She looks a little haggard, as if she hasn’t slept for days.

“Do you have a minute, Your Majesty?”

It’s weird to have her speak to me in such a respectful tone. She has never hid her disdain for me before.

“Do you need something from me?” I ask slowly, wondering what she could be up to.

Cedric has already denied any relationship with Bella. Honestly, that took me by surprise. The way Bella spoke in our first meeting, and the ones after, strongly implied that she and Cedric were together and that I was the interloper.

“I have a favor to ask of you.”

I feel a little flabbergasted. What could she possibly want from me? I have no idea what she has been up to recently, nor have I inquired. After our last encounter, I have tried to stay as far away from her as possible. I didn’t think she’d actually come seeking me.

“Is everything alright?” I ask uncomfortably.

“I would like you to ask the king to reinstate my position as the royal advisor.”

My eyes widen, and Harriet hisses, “How dare you?! How shameless—”

I lift my hand, stopping her in mid-sentence. “He removed you from that position? Permanently?” I’m taken aback by that. “When?”

She doesn’t meet my gaze. “After the miscommunication with your designer.”

“Miscommunication!” Harriet’s face is growing red, and I have a feeling she’s seconds away from exploding. “You deliberately—”

“I made a mistake. I know I crossed a line. I’m sorry.”

“You don’t sound sorry,” Harriet retorts.

“Well, I am!” Bella snaps at her.

“Is that how your apologize for something?” Harriet demands.

“Harriet, please,” I say quietly.

Bella glares at the older woman before saying, her voice tense, “Things got out of hand. I should not have implied that Cedric and I were lovers. I grew up with him. I don’t see him in that way. Neither does he look at me in that manner. He was pretty angry that I manipulated you, and I’m sorry about that.”

“You’re sorry he found out, you mean?” I get to my feet. “You’re not sorry for what you did but that your plan didn’t work.”

She bristles. I can see that apologizing is not easy for her, but she’s still standing here, and that means something.

“Why did you come here now? If he fired you so long ago, shouldn’t you have been here sooner?”

Her eyes search the ceiling. “I worked hard as the royal advisor. I thought Cedric was just angry with me and would eventually give me back the position, but he says he won’t. I put a lot of blood and sweat into managing this castle and starting certain programs. I know I made a mistake, and I’m willing to apologize for it.”

“You do realize that if you become the royal advisor, you will be working for me. Not with me but under me. You will be answerable to me. You will have to respect me and my decisions.”

She doesn’t look very happy about it, but she nods. “I understand.”

Bella has a lot of knowledge about the castle that I don’t. Letting her back into her position might be helpful.

“No.”

She goes pale. “Excuse me?”

I study her, hardening myself. “I know having you in that position could be very beneficial, Bella, but you don’t like me, and I don’t trust you. I can’t work with somebody I don’t trust, especially one who’s looking to stab me in the back at any given moment. You haven’t given me any reason to trust you. I’m sorry, but I cannot ask the king to reinstate you.”

Harriet blinks at me and then tries to hide her smile.

“But I came here and apologized!” Bella protests.

“You don’t mean it, though. And if you ever got an opportunity to hurt me again, you would.”

Her silence speaks volumes, as does the guilt in her eyes.

“If I were to speak to the king, he might listen to me, or he might not, but the fact is that you will try to undermine my decisions, based on my experience with you. I won’t allow that. My job is to manage this castle and the local nearby villages. I’m trying to get some new programs off the ground. I don’t trust you not to sabotage them.”

It takes a lot of effort to stand up for myself like this, and I’m stunned that I’m managing to do so. I also know that the only reason this is possible is because my mate is currently guarding my back. The moment he chooses to revert to his previous behavior, I will once again be in the position I was before. This is why I’m trying to work so hard. Even if he changes his mind, if he thinks I’m useful, he might…

Well, I don’t know what he will do, but I’m starting to think this place isn’t as bad as I initially thought. If I can just stay here and be useful, I might be able to carve out a niche for myself. I’m still living in Princess Vivian’s shadow, but the mark I leave on this place will be my own.

Bella looks like she has something to say to me, but she bites her tongue. “Fine. I should have known it was pointless.”

As she turns around, I see the glimmer of tears in her eyes. I divert my gaze. My intention was not to hurt her, but that was inevitable. I have to protect myself.

“There’s no reason for you to feel bad for her.”

I’m standing on the terrace of the bedroom when a large coat is dumped on me. The scent coming from it is instantly comforting, and I look over my shoulder to see Cedric standing behind me. Despite my apprehension toward him, since I am his mate, his scent brings me a comfort that I’ve never experienced before. I know it is my wolf’s reaction to his, but if I close my eyes and bury myself in his coat, I feel safe.

“What are you talking about?” I ask innocently, trying to discreetly wrap myself up in the warm coat.

He was wearing a sleeveless vest under the coat, and as he crosses his arms over his chest, his muscles bulge. I look at them admiringly. I really want to run my hands over them to see whether they are soft or hard. But I would not dare to touch this man without his permission.

“Bella. I heard she came to visit you. You denied her request.”

I sneak a glance at his eyes. “If you want to reinstate her, I won’t object.”

“No. She hasn’t learned her lesson yet.”

I try to burrow even deeper into the coat. “She was crying when she left. That’s why I feel bad. I feel like I stole something from her.”

It feels like everything I am, I stole from Princess Vivian and from Bella Asher. Am I even necessary?

“She was simply holding down the fort until the new queen arrived.” Cedric looks down at me. “She was aware of that. She just doesn’t like the idea of letting go of the control she has had up till now. I decide who runs this castle. You aren’t stealing anything from anyone. Stop wasting your time with this foolish idea.”

I huff silently.

“The full moon is going to take place in a few weeks,” Cedric suddenly says. “I will talk to the healer. If your body is able, we will try for an heir.”

My fingers tighten in the fabric of the coat. I know what that means. He plans to have sex with me.

He has never attempted it before, and I chalked it up to the fact that he simply did not want to sleep with someone who wasn’t a real princess. Or maybe he was simply not attracted to me. I know that wolves are carnal creatures. We need physical intimacy. But Cedric has never even kissed me.

And I’ve never had the mental capacity to look at him as anything other than my captor. Now, the idea that we will have to be intimate shocks me back into reality. My wolf rolls over in my mind, pleased with this development. Meanwhile, a soft flush crawls over my body. Compared to me, Cedric is massive. He has large, bulky muscles, and if he wanted to, he could crush me very easily. I’m well aware of his strength. And I have to be intimate with him—

I hear him sniff the air, and then he rumbles in his chest. “Leanna.”

My eyes squeeze shut at the warning edge to his tone. It reaches down to the very core of me, my lower muscles tensing in anticipation of…something.

“Behave,” he growls.

I tremble as a strange desire wraps itself around me. “I—I should go. I feel unwell.”

I move past him, desperate to get away from him, but he grabs my arm and yanks me back. I slam into his chest, and when I look up at him, there’s something in his eyes that makes my knees feel weak.

“W–What?” I stammer out.

“Your scent.”

His brows are knitted together, and when he lowers his mouth, I feel his breath against the side of my neck. A small sound leaves my lips, and I feel something hard pressing against my stomach. The realization of what it is makes me stumble backward, but Cedric’s arm wraps around my waist, keeping me in place.

“How many lovers have you had, Leanna?” he murmurs, his voice dark and filled with a hunger that is feeding the treacherous insanity growing within me.

“One,” I whisper. “A long time ago.”

“How long?”

I can’t even budge in his hold, his arm like a steel band around my body. “I was sixteen. Eight years ago.”

“That’s all?”

I don’t want to remember his name or his face. I don’t want to remember how he sweet-talked me into his bed.

“He was Princess Vivian’s friend. He had made a—” Humiliation has me trying to pull away. “There was a wager involved, and he won. The princess didn’t like losing to him, and I was punished. That’s it. He’s the only man I’ve ever been with.”

“A wager?” My mate narrows his eyes, studying me. “About what?”

“Is this conversation really necessary?” I ask desperately. “I would rather not think about it. It was a long time ago.”

I expect him to push me on this, but to my surprise, he nods. “Very well.”

The mention of my first heartbreak has my chest tightening. I’ve learned a lot of lessons in life; the princess made sure of it. Even now, as I gaze at my mate, I realize that I don’t trust him because of the lessons Princess Vivian taught me. I know what awaits me down the line.

I can try to be a good queen. I can put everything I learned to use.

But I can never trust this man not to hurt me.

My heart has been so badly scarred that I can’t even fathom letting anybody near it. I know what betrayal is. I know what it tastes like, what it feels like. If I stop trying to figure out the motivations behind his actions, and just focus on doing what he tells me to do, I might be more comfortable.

“I should go to bed now,” I say quietly, pulling away from him. He’s looking at me, and when he doesn’t stop me, I feel relieved. I don’t want to have a conversation with him right now.

However, I’ve only taken two steps away from him when he suddenly says, “You’re going the wrong way.”

Startled, I look back at him. “I beg your pardon?”

“There’s something I want to show you.”

“At this time of night?” I inquire warily.

He gives me an irritated look. “Yes. Do you have a problem with that?”

I can’t actually defy him. “Of course not.”

“Good. Get on.”

Before I even register his words, he shifts into his wolf form in a quick shimmer of light. I suck in a breath when I see the large, black wolf standing in front of me. He sniffs me and then nudges me with his head. When I don’t react, he snaps his teeth in my face, making me flinch.

Almost instantly, he takes a step back, as if to tell me he didn’t mean it. When he nudges me again, I realize he wants me to climb onto his back.

“Oh.” I wrap his coat tighter around me before mounting him with some difficulty. His fur is soft, and he huffs when my fingers dig into it. “Where are we—”

I don’t get to finish my question because he takes a few steps back from the railing and then runs forward and leaps over it. A startled scream leaves my mouth, and I swear I hear Cedric’s wolf huff in amusement.

I bury my face in his fur.

Our bedroom is quite far up, and jumping from such a height to the ground is terrifying. However, Cedric’s wolf does it quite easily. His feet have barely landed when he begins racing toward the gate. There are a few shifters around, but nobody stops us.

Of course not. They must recognizing their king.

A few of them shift forms and try to join us, but he snaps his teeth at them, making them hang back.

I look over my shoulder at them as they begin racing off in a different direction, to play. Wolves enjoy playing in their animal forms together, bonding with each other. As they disappear into the trees, I feel a hint of envy. They’re probably heading off to go on a run.

I’ve shifted plenty of times, but I’ve never joined in a pack run, which is something all shifters take part in. I was never allowed to. If wolf shifters don’t assume their true form frequently, it can harm their wolf. Whenever I shifted back in the East, I had to do it privately, within the confines of my room.

As Cedric runs across the land, I lift my head. My braid was not securely tied, and the sections of hair unravel in the wind. The air is cold and slices against my cheeks, but I like it. My eyes shutter close as I enjoy the freedom. It’s exhilarating.

He ran at a similar pace when he brought me here, but I was half out of my mind back then. Now, though? I want to laugh out loud. I want to tell him to run faster.

A small giggle escapes my mouth before I clamp my mouth shut. However, Cedric hears it, and he howls in response. It’s almost as if he can sense what I want, and he picks up his pace. By the time he slows to a walk, my face is flushed from excitement and I’m trembling, unable to stop smiling.

I have no idea where we are. Before I can even try to get my bearings, Cedric shifts back, and suddenly he’s holding me in his arms like a bride being carried over the threshold. I try to calm my rapidly beating heart as I look around.

I hear the sounds of waves crashing just before my eyes settle on the vast expanse of water.

The ocean. We’re on a beach.

“What are we doing here?” Cedric lowers my legs to the ground, and I look around. There is sand underneath my feet, and it’s really dark out. “Your Majesty?”

He doesn’t respond, simply crouching down and gathering a few stones. He tosses them in his hand once before picking one out and tossing it in the direction of the ocean. I follow the stone’s progress, and when it makes contact with the water’s surface, something strange happens. The spot glows brightly.

As the stone skips along the surface, each point of contact lights up, a mesmerizing blue and silver light that stays for a few seconds before fading away.

My gaze lingers on the glowing sea. I’m fascinated. “What is that?”

“Something you can only find in the Northern Wolf Kingdom,” Cedric tells me. I don’t know why he sounds so smug.

“Is it some kind of algae?” I ask, curious now.

When I take a step toward the water, he stops me. “Careful. The water gets quite deep after a certain point.”

“I won’t go far,” I promise as I slip off my shoes.

“Leanna.” There is a warning edge to Cedric’s voice, but I don’t care. I step into the water and am surprised that it’s not cold. Wiggling my toes in delight, I can’t help but grin.

“Look!” I stomp my feet in place, and the glow appears once again. “Cedric, look! It’s lighting up where I walk!”

“I can see that.” He doesn’t sound disdainful, just amused.

I look around before splashing my feet in the water some more and watching the disturbed spots glow. I don’t know why I’m getting so excited. I take a few more steps, only to be plucked out of the water by two strong hands under my arms.

“That’s as far as you go. There’s a steep drop there.”

I flush, feeling Cedric holding me like a child, my legs dangling in the air. “Okay, okay. Put me down.”

He carries me back to the shore, ignoring my protests. But when my wet feet hit the sand, it clings to my skin. Dismay fills me when I realize that I won’t be able to wear my shoes with this sand all over my feet.

“I have to wash my—”

Cedric picks me up again and lowers me slowly into the edge of the water so that only my feet dip in.

Flustered, I cry out, “W–What are you doing?”

“Cleaning your feet,” he says, clearly confused.

“I can do it myself!” My face feels hot. “Let me go! Please!”

He sighs as if he simply can’t understand me but puts me down.

I rinse my feet, but then I face another dilemma. “My shoes—”

I feel like an idiot now.

Cedric shakes his head at me and fetches them. I try to put them on, but no matter what I do, either they will get wet or I will have to step into the sand. “I guess I can’t wear them.”

“At times, you are completely hopeless,” he growls before crouching down and pulling my feet toward him. I nearly fall over with the force he uses.

My face is burning. “You don’t have to do this. I can just walk barefoot!”

“Do you ever stop yapping?” he snaps.

I shut up. He cleans off my feet at the edge of the water and then wipes them with his shirt before putting on the shoes.

“There. Now don’t take them off again.”

Dazed, I stare at the man. He just washed my feet and put my shoes on for me. Is this the same brute who kidnapped me and said all sorts of horrid things to me? He’s the king of the Northern Wolf Kingdom, and he’s washing my feet?

I feel overwhelmed and don’t know what to think.

Nobody has ever done something like that for me before. Nobody has looked after me before or taken care of me. For a moment, my eyes burn with emotions, and I don’t know what to do with them. I don’t know what to make of this man who says one thing and does another.

Turning my gaze away from him, I try to focus on something else.

“If it’s not algae, what is it?” I ask finally.

“We throw the corpses of the monsters in here,” Cedric says, almost proudly. “Their bodies are tainted with the magic from the Veil, and it causes this effect in the water. This ocean is one of the deepest in the world. It disintegrates the corpses, and the magic causes this glowing effect.”

My face goes pale at his explanation.

I look down at my feet. Suddenly, the charm of the whole experience vanishes. The glowing was caused by the decaying remains of monsters!

“I’m sure this is better than whatever Erik showed you,” Cedric says, his voice prideful.

I stare at him and then at the ocean. “That was from algae. This is—This is from corpses.”

“Exactly. It’s fascinating isn’t it?” My mate looks far too pleased. When he gives me an expectant look, I don’t have the heart to tell him how creepy it is.

“Definitely.” I take a step away from the waves that are washing up on the shore. “Maybe we should leave now.”

“You want to leave?” He looks surprised. “Don’t you want to go for a run? This is your first time outside of the castle and the villages.”

I go still. “You mean, I can shift?”

He laughs. “That is how you will go for a run, isn’t it?”

My mouth moves as I try to form words. “It’s just that—I mean, I’ve never really shifted in front of anyone before.”

“You’ve never gone on a pack run? Are you telling me the wolves in the Eastern Kingdom don’t bond during pack runs?” He looks surprised, and I shake my head.

“They do. I just wasn’t allowed to join them.” I look around the beach. It’s empty. “What about my clothes?”

My mate frowns. “What about them?”

“Don’t I have to take them off?”

He gives me a long look. “Do you want to shift naked?”

“But if I shift with my clothes on, they will—”

“We are in the North. The clothes we have are enchanted by a witch who works for the Human Wolf Kingdom. We don’t have to remove them before shifting. They just disappear and then reappear.”

His impatient explanation baffles me. “We didn’t have anything like that in the East.”

“Of course not.” Cedric looks annoyed. “Your king was more focused on himself than looking after his people. It’s common knowledge that the Human Wolf Kingdom and the Eastern Wolf Kingdom don’t have the best relationship. It makes sense that’s such a trade never took place between them.”

“So, I just shift, then?” I ask hesitantly.

“Give it a try,” he suggests.

Closing my eyes, I allow the change to wash over me. I feel my limbs stretch and expand, and when I open my eyes, I’m standing on all fours.

My heart pounding, I look at Cedric, who is staring at me. He approaches me, and I close my eyes, fearing the worst. However, he sounds fascinated as he runs his hand over my dark fur.

“Stunning.”