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Cedric Raine

Harriet once told me that one needs not to hear but to listen.

I never understood the difference. Hearing is the same thing as listening, isn’t it?

But as my mate looks at me, her voice ragged, her eyes devastated and filled with tears, I finally understand.

I’ve been hearing her ever since I found her again, but not once have I tried to listen to what she has been saying. My stomach churns.

A slave.

That’s how she viewed herself? Even when she was with me? Did I make her feel that way?

For the second time in my life, I feel helpless. I don’t know what to say to her. My mate—This is my fault. Of course it’s my fault.

I’m almost glad when our son interrupts us. Leanna is shocked, and she turns around quickly. “Finn. I—Did we wake you?”

The boy steps down from the stairs, looking upset. “Why’re you crying?”

My mate instantly wipes away her tears. “I’m not. Why aren’t you in bed?”

“Is it because of him?” There’s a wealth of anger in his voice. He comes to stand in front of his mother protectively, and his tone turns a little rude. “Why are you here? Go home! We don’t want you here!”

“Finn!” Leanna quickly slaps her hand over his mouth, muffling his next words. “You can’t speak to him like that!”

He pulls her hand away. “Why not? Because he’s my dad?”

I freeze at his words, and Leanna pales. “Who—Who told you that?”

“I’m not stupid, Mom. He looks like me, and I heard you talking.” Finn glares at me. “I don’t need a dad who makes my mom cry. Go away!”

I’m torn between feeling hurt and proud. He’s protecting her. Our son is shielding his mother, even if it is from me.

Right now, though, both of them are upset. I know I should leave. Leanna needs to handle this situation, and I—well, I don’t have a place in her life. Maybe that’s something I should accept.

It’s amusing to think that I have spent my life seizing what I want by force, but the one thing I need, I can’t take. Because if I drag this woman back with me, it’ll kill her spirit.

A slave. A prisoner.

“Go!” Finn yells at me, clutching his mother’s hand. “We don’t need you.”

“Finn!”

“I’m going,” I say calmly. My wolf slumps within me, aching, miserable.

“No, you’re not!” Leanna says fiercely. “You’re not going anywhere. Finn, you don’t talk to your father like that.”

“But he made you cry!” Finn’s face is red with anger. “We don’t need—”

“He is your father. And he didn’t make me cry. We were having a discussion. Which we”—her voice softens—“which we shouldn’t have been having here. You shouldn’t have heard any of that. I’m sorry.”

“Mom—”

Leanna crouches before him and cups his face. “He’s a good man, Finn. And it’s high time you two had a proper introduction. Cedric?”

She looks at me, and the previous anger and frustration in her eyes have disappeared. Instead, she looks nervous. It would have been so easy for her to use this opportunity to turn my son against me. The easiest thing in the world. And given her conflicted feelings toward me, that would have been the route I expected her to take.

Why does she keep defying my expectations? Where do I stand in this woman’s eyes?

When I don’t move, Leanna propels Finn toward me. “Finn, this is your father, King Cedric Raine.”

“King?” Finn’s eyes widen, and he studies me. However, he doesn’t seem too pleased. “I don’t care if you’re a king. I don’t care if you’re my dad. You made my mom cry!”

“It wasn’t his fault,” Leanna lightly chastises him. “Look, he came all this way to see you. And”—she pauses before continuing—“he’s going to take you out every night so that you can run and play in your wolf form. He’s going to teach you a lot of things, so I want you to behave.”

“But Mom—”

She shakes her head. “No. Whatever happens between your father and me does not concern you. He’s your dad, and he wants to get to know you. And”—another struggling breath—“I know you want to get to know him. That’s what I want, too.”

Finn crosses his arms over his chest, his lower lip jutting out in a petulant manner. “If he makes you cry again—”

“I won’t,” I finally say. “I won’t hurt your mother again. You have my word. And a man’s word is his bond.”

Finn looks doubtful, and when he steals a glance at his mother, she nods. “He’s right. And he didn’t do anything to hurt me before.”

My son holds on to his mother for a few seconds before asking her quietly, “So, why is he here now? Why not before? And what’s he king of? Where’s his crown?”

“My kingdom is in the North, on the other side of the Veil,” I explain.

“I’m not allowed to go near the Veil.”

“That’s good,” I tell him. “It’s not safe. But our—my home is beyond there.”

“Can I see it?”

I stare at him, struggling to keep my promise to him not to make his mother cry. But my own heart cracks as I answer, slowly, “Perhaps one day.” Leanna’s eyes swivel toward me, but I don’t meet her gaze. “And I wasn’t able to come before because I was fighting the monsters in the North. But I’m here now.”

“Wait.” Finn looks at his mother, suddenly wary. “Does this mean we have to leave here and go to the North?”

Before she can say anything, I interject, “No. You’re—I think you’re safer here.” Another crack in my heart. He’s safer away from me and my world. Happier. “But I’ll come see you, and when you’re grown up, you can decide for yourself.” Leanna’s eyes are still on me. Everything feels strange. My chest is heavy with a different sort of grief. “I should go now. You two should rest.”

Leanna gets to her feet. “Ced—”

But I’m already out the door. I head to the park across the road. I’m almost to the bench when I hear her voice again.

“Cedric!”

I come to a halt.

My mate sounds frazzled, and when I don’t turn around to face her, she moves to stand in front of me. “What was that?”

“What?”

“That! Inside! You said—” She searches my eyes. “You said he doesn’t have to go to the North. And—”

I cut her off. “It’s been a long night. We can talk later. Go to bed.”

“But—”

“Not right now.” I shake my head. “You were right. Too many things have happened today. I also need time to think.”

“Then do it inside,” she says abruptly. “In the house, not out here.”

I cast a cautious look toward her small home. “I’m comfortable keeping vigil out here.”

“I’m not, Cedric. I want you to come inside and be with your family.”

“My family?” I stare at her. “You’re not making any sense, Leanna. You say one thing, and then you say something else. You do one thing—”

“And then I do something else, I know,” she mutters, grabbing my hand and pulling me back toward the house. “I’m well aware of how I’m acting. Just cut me some slack for a while till my brain starts functioning properly. And in the meantime, come inside.”

I let her drag me into her home, wondering when things will start making sense to both of us.

I understand her inner conflict. One of us will ultimately have to make a sacrifice.

And she has made too many sacrifices to count.

Leanna has to be at the palace in the morning, so I accompany her and Finn there. My son is still distrustful of me, but I can see the curiosity in his eyes whenever he looks at me. I didn’t sleep last night. Leanna set up another bedroom for me, but I spent the night in the hallway outside her door. I wanted to be as close to her as possible because, soon enough, I may have to leave her here.

I catch my mate stealing a glance at me as we leave the house. Since I don’t fit in her small car, we decide to make our way to the woods, where we’ll shift and run to the palace. When she shifts into her wolf form, I can’t help but admire her. She was always beautiful, but her wolf has also matured over the years. Its fur is silkier and healthier, its body fuller.

She sniffs me all over, her wolf more open about its feelings than its human counterpart. She licks my nose before turning around and sniffing the young wolf pup who is prancing between her legs. My wolf rumbles happily at the sight of them. It wants to play, and it wants to herd our small family to show off.

I nudge my son, who is more interested in running around in circles. Reluctantly, he follows his mother. But when Leanna breaks into a run, he howls in excitement and gives chase. I observe for a while, noting his strength. Even in my wolf form, I am a critical thinker. Finn is just a few years shy of puberty. In another year, he’s going to start growing even more, especially in his wolf form. It’s going to be an explosive growth. He has a lot of pent-up energy. I see him snap at his mother’s tail, and I give him a warning growl.

Leanna shoots me a sharp look over her shoulder, but I ignore her. Eager to test me, Finn tries to bite me. I immediately slam my paw down on him, pinning him to the ground. Leanna moves toward us, but one look from me has her backing off. Finn isn’t scared; he’s wriggling under my paw, still trying to bite my leg. When I growl at him, he looks at his mother for help. Even now, there is defiance in his eyes. He doesn’t want to accept me as alpha of our small pack. It’s not surprising. I haven’t been around, and he has been growing up without me.

In her wolf form, Leanna is more in touch with her instincts. She comes over and licks his head to offer comfort, but she doesn’t try to warn me away.

When Finn realizes his mother is not going to help him, he gets more aggressive in trying to escape. One more growl from me and he realizes there’s no way out. I can sense my mate’s tension. When she doesn’t intervene, I look over to see her watching me.

My attention turns back to Finn, and when he makes one final attempt, I snap my teeth inches from his nose. That makes him stop. He stares up at me, and then his ears finally go flat in submission. Having made my point, I release him. He rubs against me once before trotting off to his mother, who licks him lovingly. But when Leanna meets my gaze, I see a reluctant understanding. She finally knows what I meant when I told her that he needs a more dominant wolf in his life.

As we reach the woods surrounding the palace, we are met by Erik’s soldiers. They patrol the trees to prevent both humans and wolves from entering the palace grounds or accessing the area where the Veil is. We shift back to our human forms, and it doesn’t take us much longer to get to the palace, where an office space has been set up for my mate.

“Can I go play outside?” Finn asks eagerly.

“Sure,” Leanna agrees. “But stick to the grounds, and don’t cross the lake. I want you to stay within earshot. If I call, you’d better answer.”

Finn nods, bouncing around the room that overlooks the lavish palace gardens.

“Derrick will watch him. He’s outside.”

Leanna jerks at my words. “Derrick? But—”

“He won’t let anything happen to our son,” I say gruffly. “Unless he wants to lose his ability to produce his own children at some point.” Finn is already climbing out the window, and I grab him by the back of the shirt without so much as a look. “Are you okay with that?”

My eyes are on Leanna.

This is new. I’ve never asked anybody for permission in my life. But Leanna holds more power over me in her small fist than anyone ever has. She says she was desperate to please me eight years ago, to survive. Now the roles have reversed. I’m at risk of losing my family, and there’s nothing I won’t do to keep her and my son.

Leanna nods, and I point out Derrick to Finn. “See the man standing there, near the gazebo?”

Dangling one foot off the ground due to my grip on the back of his shirt, Finn nods.

“He’ll be watching you.”

“I don’t need a babysitter!” he protests.

“I say you do.”

“Mom!”

“He’s your father’s friend.” Leanna turns her attention to the files stacked before her. “Do what he says and behave yourself.”

“I always behave myself,” Finn mutters. “Fine. Can I go now?”

I release him, and he bounds out the window, shifting in mid-air. Once we’re alone, Leanna gazes at me. “I’ll be working here with Cassian for a while. What are you going to do?”

“I have something to discuss with Erik.”

Her lips part as if she wants to say something, but she hesitates. “Okay. I’ll be here.”

Her voice is soft and hesitant. I wish I could ask her what she wanted to say, but there is a wall between us, and I’m starting to think I may never be able to cross it.

Erik is in his office.

I’ve been in this marbled room with its high ceilings and large windows before. He’s pacing, his lean, muscled body hidden under one of the ridiculous suits that he likes wearing so much. He sees me and holds up a finger, a phone pressed to his ear. He’s speaking in another language, arguing with someone.

I lean against the door jamb, hands in my pockets, waiting for him to be done.

The tension in his voice is rising with each word, and at one point, he slams his fist against the wall. That has me raising my eyebrows. Erik is not a man who is easily rattled. He’s normally extremely cunning and dangerously calm, even in the face of potential death.

I would know.

Before his brother’s disappearance, Erik was the commander of the Human Wolf Kingdom’s army. The Human Wolf Kingdom and the North have always shared a good relationship, and Erik battled the monsters at the Veil with me several times when we needed reinforcements. I’ve seen him fight in both human and wolf form. He’s unflinching, the masterful control he has over his temper making him a terrifying opponent.

He doesn’t have warrior blood like me, but he fights just as viciously and relentlessly.

When he ends the call, I ask, “What was that about?”

He shoots me a dark look. “Nothing.”

My lips twist. “Didn’t seem like nothing.”

He contemplates me for a few seconds before walking over to the desk and slumping into his chair. “There was a possible sighting of Griffin in eastern Europe. I knew it would be a dead end, but I was still trying to chase it down.”

I meet his gaze, my own steady. “Nothing came of it, then?”

“What do you think?”

“I think you don’t want to face the truth. It’s been too many years, Erik. We both know that if he were alive, you would have found him by now. You’ve left no stone unturned.”

His expression remains dark. “I will never stop searching for him. Griffin wasn’t weak. He was an alpha on top of being a powerful king. He underwent intense training. I refuse to believe he would succumb so easily.”

I rarely talk about my parents, but when I look at the man before me, his eyes glinting fiercely, I find myself saying, “I thought the same of my father. But the rebels took him, and you’re well aware of what they did to him and my mother. According to the reports, my father was killed last. He would never have watched my mother suffer if he could have helped it. Somehow, those people are able to restrain even the strongest of alphas. You cannot sit on this throne with one leg out the door, Erik.”

I see the insult cross his face. “I have done right by this kingdom.”

“This kingdom needs an heir. You need to find a mate and have a child. But not my mate and not my child.”

He stares at me before chuckling somberly. “So, that’s what this is about. She’s not your mate, Cedric. You should’ve marked her when you had the chance.”

“And you should’ve told me she was here.” My hands curl into fists. “Eight years—”

“I tried. She was still unconscious, and my healers had detected the child inside her. I reached out to you, but you were not in the castle, and the woman who received my message claimed to be your mate. I had my people investigate.” His eyes are hard as he looks at me. “It didn’t take me long to discover the rumors in your land. Leanna had deceived you and pretended to be the Eastern Princess, and when the real Vivian showed up, you sent orders for Leanna to be killed.”

My jaw tightens. “That’s not what happened.”

“Which part?” the man before me asks nonchalantly. “The one where she tried to deceive you or the one where you tried to kill her?”

“Both!” I snarl. “I knew who she was when I brought her to the North. And I took Leanna as my mate, not Vivian.”

“But you announced Leanna as Princess Vivian,” Erik points out slyly. “You intended for her to be the princess’s substitute.”

My eyes narrow. “An error in judgment.”

“No.” Erik leans back in his chair. “It’s just you and me here, Cedric. Let’s be honest. You never thought a woman could tame you. Which is exactly what Leanna managed to do.”

“If you’re implying that she manipulated me—”

Erik scoffs. “Leanna? Just because a woman makes you soft doesn’t mean she’s manipulating you. I’m not that foolish. And remember, I had met Leanna before. I also had the unfortunate chance of meeting Vivian after Leanna’s visit. I had spent enough time with Leanna to know that the woman I met the next time wasn’t her. Their scents are slightly similar, or at least they were back then, so they could be easily confused. However, Leanna was much more graceful and refined. The woman I had intended to pursue as my mate was nowhere to be found during that next meeting.”

It takes me a couple seconds to understand what he means, and then, a wave of fury courses through me.

“You’ve been interested in my mate this whole time?” I growl, straightening up. “Make no mistake about this, Erik. She’s mine. She has always been mine. If you so much as attempt to woo her, I will forget everything and launch a full-scale war against the Human Wolf Kingdom.”

Erik’s lips curl at one corner. “That’s a lot of effort for someone who is not your queen. And from what I gather, Leanna wants nothing to do with you.”

“Even if she doesn’t—” My wolf howls inside me with a combination of misery and anger. “Even if she doesn’t, she’s still my mate. You can’t have her. If she doesn’t want to go to the North with me, I’ll keep coming here.”

Erik’s smile is knowing. “Why not drag her back there?”

My eyes narrow. “I’m not going to force her to do anything. And I thought you were supposed to give her protection here, even from me. Or was all that just for show?”

He shrugs. “No, it wasn’t. I won’t let you coerce her into anything. But I am also not going to risk my kingdom for her. She’s an asset, and she would make an excellent queen. I’ll fight you to keep her here but not at the risk of war. We both know threatening a war is overkill.” Erik gets to his feet, walks over to the window, and looks outside. “She was in bad shape when she came here. Desperately clinging to life. She knew she was pregnant. The first thing she asked was for help to save her and her baby. You reduced her to that. And if you didn’t, your people did. How do you know they won’t do it again?”

I don’t think I’ll ever truly be free of this guilt. If I had only known that she had survived the Misty Forest, everything would be different now. But I can’t turn back time. “If I’d discovered that she was alive, I would have gotten rid of Vivian. And if the elders had protested, I would’ve gotten rid of them, as well.”

“And now? Vivian’s your queen.” Erik turns to face me. “What will you do about her now?”

“My queen—My legal queen,” I say coldly, “is here. She’s the only one I mated.”

“Under Vivian’s name.”

“It doesn’t matter. The vows I made were to Leanna.”

“Insincere vows.”

“Don’t try to tell me about my sincerity!” I say harshly, taking a step forward, ready to spill blood. “I made a mistake. I accept that. But I won’t lose her, and certainly not to you.”

“Then give me a reason to help you convince her she’ll be safe and happy in the North.” Anger crosses Erik’s face, his tone biting.

I’m stunned for a moment. “What?” When he doesn’t reply, my brow furrows. “You want her to go back with me?”

“No, I don’t. But I know Leanna. She has never forgotten you. She has never moved on. Several eligible males have expressed curiosity about her, but she doesn’t even look at them. She says she’s not interested, but that’s not it. As an unmarked female, with the kind of men she’s been surrounded by, she should have shown some attraction toward them. But she hasn’t. And I haven’t seen her wolf react to any male, either.”

His words give me some hope. “But she was willing to mate you.”

“To get away from you!” Erik retorts. “She’s scared of you.”

“I won’t hurt her.”

“Does she know that beyond a reasonable doubt?” My silence speaks volumes, and Erik sighs. “What do you plan to do, Cedric? If she agrees to go back with you, what’s your plan for the woman who claims to be your queen? And what’s your plan for the elders?”

I already spent the night considering my options. Even if I have to make the hard choice and not force Leanna to return with me, her mere existence and that of my son’s will put them in danger.

“No matter the outcome, whether they choose to stay here or come with me, since they’re alive, Vivian will become a political prisoner. Whoever opposes me will have their entire bloodline erased.”

“And you think that will work?” Erik raises an eyebrow. “You think the Eastern Kingdom will allow it? Their princess, who has been a queen for the past eight years, is suddenly thrown into the dungeons as a prisoner?”

“They won’t have a choice.”

The man before me bursts into incredulous laughter. “I always wondered how you managed to keep the North under control. It’s through brute force, isn’t it? You kill your enemies.”

“That’s how it’s done.”

His amused look fades. “No. Not when the danger is from the inside, Cedric. The East will do everything in their power to get rid of Leanna and Finn. And they will have plenty of support from among your own people.”

“So, I’ll kill them.”

“Kill whom? How many? Will you wipe out all the noble families in the North? How much blood will you shed? And how much blood will Leanna be comfortable with you shedding?”

I don’t have an answer to that.

Erik walks around his desk to lean against the edge of it, his hands in the pockets of his suit pants. “I’m not a fool, Cedric. I’ve heard that you stay at the border for the majority of the year. I can only assume you’re trying to avoid Vivian. And then there is the very real fact that she hasn’t conceived a child yet. Seeing how fertile our kind is, the only reason she hasn’t gotten pregnant is because you have not lain with her. I can put two and two together.”

He sounds very sure of himself. I let him continue talking. I want to see where he’s going with this.

“You’ve never accepted Princess Vivian. I had my suspicions with respect to how you felt about Leanna, and you confirmed them the other day when you found her here. I’m not the kind of man who steals another wolf’s fated mate, Cedric. No matter how much I like her. I didn’t know you two were fated mates till you said it. But if you want to keep her safe, you have to play politics.”

“So, that day when you invited me to the palace”—I give him a considering look—“you meant for Leanna and me to meet up?”

Erik grins. “What do you think? Leanna is a good woman. And she’s gone through plenty of hardships. She didn’t have to tell me about them; I had my spies in the East find out everything I needed to know. Her existence was an open secret—her treatment at Vivian’s hand, even more so. If you ever want to know what your mate went through, I have a whole file.”

“I want to see it.”

“Sure.” He’s not smiling now. “I’ll help you, Cedric. Unlike you, I am very good at playing politics. Two months from now is the annual ball. As you know, this is an annual function hosted in our kingdom, and wolves from both the Northern and the Eastern Kingdoms will be in attendance, including the elders. Vivian has been attending in your absence. I’m sure she will make an appearance again, especially if she knows you will be here. Take the opportunity to give Leanna the mating mark. Announce your mate and your heir to the world. And I will give you my full backing.”

I stare at Erik. “Why are you doing this?”

He turns his back to me and fidgets with something on his desk. “Because she loves you. She won’t admit it, but it’s in her eyes when she looks at you. Under all that anger and hurt, I see love.” His voice lowers. “And she will never look at me that way, no matter how many years we spend together.”

He looks over his shoulder, meeting my gaze. Our mutual understanding is silent.

We have the same goal: to protect the woman we both love.