Page 80 of All Your Deadly Truths (The Filthy Duet #2)

Xeraphine

“ N o, that is not what I agreed to, Belial!” I like this side of Alaric. He’s angry because it seems we are both being fucked with this deal.

All the great ruler of the Beyond does is laugh while looking down at me. “You will give birth to a part Divine, part Demon and part Mundane. Then, hand it over to me. That… is the deal.”

Alaric steps in front of me, and shouts, “It was meant to be my revenge! You can’t have what you promised me!”

Wrapping my arms around my waist, I look at Proserpina. She’s leaned off to one side, hand on her hip staring at her… husband? Her father? That concept still shakes me, but it’s been thousands of years, I imagine that doesn’t even cross her mind anymore.

“You will know your place, Fallen,” Belial snaps.

“You cannot break a deal. If she so chooses—” Interesting… He wants to give me a choice now. “—to give me that child, it is mine. Not yours.”

A low, throaty rumble escapes Belial’s chest. “Do you remember our deal, Alaric? If I recall, you denied my offer of her. Which means anything that comes out of her, I can do whatever I want with.”

“I’m standing right here, you fucking vile men,” I groan. “Disgusting…”

“Do you understand the consequences of such a child?” It’s the first time Proserpina has spoken since consoling me moments before the deal was brought up. She’s not concerned about my feelings, but I’m not surprised. “You will be culminating the three worlds. That child will be…” She trails off.

As though I’m carrying it already, Belial stares directly down at my stomach. “Yes, I do.”

Heat rolls through my abdomen straight to my chest, but before I can scream obscenities, Alaric puts his hand in front of me… right over the place Belial is be ating his gaze into. “No. I don’t agree, and this deal needs me to be fulfilled.”

“Growing a conscience?”

Shaking his head, the Fallen hisses, “I will not rape her, and that is the only way this would happen. Even if she said yes right here, right now, the moment we get back to the mortal world, that will change. Bounding us to this deal will make me force her into carrying a child out of manipulation.”

“The Divine, so fucking ethical,” Belial spits. “Then fine, the boy dies, Tali takes her, and rapes her to reproduce.”

I nearly jump out of surprise when Alaric turns to face me, his hand resting on my upper arm. “We will figure it out, come on.”

I’m aware that his actions right now are for selfish reasons. He wants a child to use against the Vayl for what they did to him. What the child would be used for… I’m unsure. Maybe just a big ‘fuck you’ to them for hurting Alaric, who knows.

It’s obvious that Belial would use the child to bring war.

That won’t happen, not for a long time—No, actually, it will never happen, because I’m not here to offer up my body.

I nod at Alaric, and prepare to walk away when Belial says, “I heard you calling for me.” Slowly, I tilt my head to gaze in his direction. “Your cries for freedom, for peace. You didn’t know this but you should have been calling for Proserpina.”

I’m not ignorant to that now. If I had called for her, things may have been different. Likely, I would have been saved from the misery of my life, and wandered down here in the Beyond.

But then I think of Kairhyse, and the prospect of never having met him.

“Even still, you are damned and the one that holds your domain is your mother. Unless she were to summon Proserpina to take you, you’re stuck on Earth.”

He’s a snake, strategic with his wording. As I turn my head to see Proserpina looking at me, my words catch. “You… would take her if she was to be damned?”

Sadness wraps around her; it’s a salty and sweet fragrance. She nods, and I feel my heart slowly breaking. “If that was her damnation, then yes, I would take her.”

“I-Is there any way to damn her without her… taking my Mark?”

Her throat bobs, and the sigh she releases is all the answer I get.

She’ll send people after Kai… to kill him… just so she doesn’t end up doing it herself. The thought makes my breath quicken. Is he okay right now? Have I left him to the wolves for answers that won’t even help?

“So, nine months of your life to birth me a child of war, for information that will aid in saving you… and a means to end your suffering if you can’t save him.”

“Belial.” Proserpina comes around to stand beside him. “You cannot dictate her ending, that is for me to choose.”

“Then choose, my love.” His head cranes down to her, his hand cupping her face, completely consuming half of it. “Have her be used by Tali, or me.”

My vision blurs, and when I look at Alaric, he is softly shaking his head. “No.” His word merely a whisper from his throat, his lips don’t even move.

What if I can’t save him…

“Xeraphine,” Proserpina calls for me, and I look at her with tears lining my lids. “Us…” I bite my bottom lip and swallow. “Or Tali.”

Can’t I say neither? Can’t I choose myself?

I can’t live without him.

No, I don’t want to live without him. I’ve seen what my life was without Kairhyse in it.

That day when he appeared in the club, it was a sense of the weight of the world receded.

I hadn’t recognized what it was, taking it at face value of irritation that he looked so fucking good and I couldn’t grind against him, instead of my target.

I just know life without him will take me back to a world of weighted pain that will crush me.

“I choose him,” I whisper.

He wants me to choose myself, always, but I’ll never be able to do that. I wish he would have let me go, but at the same time, I’m happy he didn’t.

When I look at Alaric, his head dips.

Maybe I can give him what he wants at the end of all this. I’m sure we can get this done without him having to fuck me.

My Amoro pulls a string against my heart, and in an act that is only characteristic toward Kai, I move my hand to his cheek.

“Thanks.”

He sighs. “I’m sorry.”

“Me too…” I drop my hand and look back to Proserpina and Belial. “I’ll give you what you want, but there is one more condition I want to add.”

Freedom feels as elusive as the happiness I crave. Maybe if I fight for another ten years, I’ll finally see those gates open for me.

Kai hasn’t interrupted me once since I started explaining the deal. The anger in his eyes has slowly faded, and I imagine it’s because of how Alaric tried to stop me.

“He then gave me the information about Archer, and said he’d allow his passage to the Beyond if he so chose. Then provided me this.” I push the blade across the counter that separates us to him. “It has two uses.”

He reaches for it, picking it up by the hilt and looking over it, still not saying a word.

“It won’t break over time. And it could situate itself in a heart and keep it from starting.” That gets his attention, and he jerks his head upward. I nod, understanding where his mind is going. “If I can overpower Tali, win in a fight, and kill her, I can place it through her heart and bury her.”

There is a sense of thought running through his eyes as he shifts his gaze back to the blade. He’s thinking exactly what I am.

Fear is exhausting .

“You’ll be looking over your shoulder for the rest of your life,” he says before placing the weapon back onto the wooden counter.

I nod.

“Proserpina said she’d take Tali if she willingly separated herself from this world, or if you damned her to the Beyond,” he continues, and I swallow so hard that I’m forced to clear my throat.

Again, I nod.

“You had a condition. What was it?”

I wrap my arms around my waist, turning my gaze away from him as I scan the small hotel room.

We arrived thirty minutes ago and I’ve been talking nonstop since.

I’m exhausted, hungry—and not just for food.

I didn’t feed off of him when he came nor anytime in between, and my Amoro is punishing me for it.

I must be too out of it, because I don’t hear his footsteps as he rounds into the kitchen and stands beside me.

“Can I hold you?” he asks, so genuinely I believe he would heed my request if I told him no.

That is what I want though, for him to hold onto me and never let me go.

“Please.”

He wraps an arm over my shoulders, the other around my head and pulls me tight into his chest. I move my hands behind his back and up his shoulder blades.

As he leans against the counter, I rest further into him.

His familiar scent of apples and cinnamon wraps around my senses, as if they were a tangible thing.

It brings me home, settling me in front of a wooden fireplace, and reminding me of a love I’d thought was impossible to have.

His chest expands as he takes a deep breath, his outward sigh brushing against the top of my head just before he places a kiss.

“The condition, little demon.”

“To give me time.” I swallow hard. “Hours mean minutes to them— hours, days… I’ve asked for years.

” He says nothing, but I know his silence—it’s full of questions.

I just hope I can give him the answers he’s looking for.

“I’m hoping something will change. Maybe another Hybrid like me will come along… ”

“How long?” I guess I didn’t answer the one he silently was hoping I’d give.

“Nothing was established.”

“And Alaric…” He grits his teeth. “He isn’t touching you, Xera, I’m not fucking around.”

With a gentle nod, I sigh. “I know, Kai, and so does he.”

“Alaric.” The moment we are out of the zombie-land lobby, I grab his shirt and halt us both. “Stop.”

He looks over his shoulder at me, his deep-set blue eyes more hollow than I’ve ever seen them. I’m unsure of if his kind need sleep, but he looks like he’s not had any for months, maybe years.

“I meant what I said.” He narrows his eyes, but I don’t give him the time to speak. “You won’t touch me, and I’ll never let you fuck me. We don’t even know how long it would take to happen, once, twice—a thousand times. I… nor Kai would allow for it.”

His head falls back as he sighs, his fingers coming and running through his long white hair. “I’m aware.” The hall we are in is quiet, so much so I fear even our whispered voices will carry to all the decease that lay at rest. “You’ve doomed a lot of people.”

“I did.” I don’t hesitate to respond. “But I don’t care. If I can save him, and me, I’d sacrifice every world for it.”

“Yeah? Then what? When the Beyond uses that… our… abomination, do you not think it will spread to the mortal world? War has casualties, Xera.”

“I don’t care.”

“You should, because what of Sydni? What of your happiness when that happens? Do you think the likes of mortals and immortals won’t feel that decision?

You and I, we are eternal, sweetheart. The world would burn, but we would never become ash with it.

We will walk amongst it as it births a new one. ”

“Then let me give you what you wanted.” His eyes widen.

“Not right now, not in ten years, maybe not in one hundred.” I pause, watching him as the gears begin to turn in his head.

“We will give them what they asked for… but I, too, will give you, yours. Then, I want nothing to do with you, the Vayl, or the Beyond. Pr otect them as you so desire, or don’t, I don’t give a fuck. ”

“You are insane. Bringing two of… What the fuck would they even be called?”

“I don’t know. Who fucking cares?” I sigh and shake my head. “Veskar? A vessel… an instrument for someone else’s purpose.”

“You just came up with that on the spot?”

“You think me so fucking stupid, don’t you?”

We both pause. The silence all telling we are hoping for the same thing.

“Maybe… they’ll have your morals.”

“And your resilience,” he says with a half-smile. “Fight against what they want, and instead, do what is right.” He steps forward to me and I look up at him. “Okay…”

“Once my mother is taken care of, find a way to get what we need to get done without the… traditional means.”

“You’ll still have to carry them,” he murmurs and places out his hand toward me. “That won’t change. You’ll be their carrier. Their vessel.”

I nod. “Kai will take care of me.” I place the blade that was given to me by Belial in his hand. Since, you know, I don’t have fucking pockets in this damn dress, he’ll have to carry it.

He chuckles. “He will. His obsession runs deep enough I’ll never doubt his need to care for you.”

I won’t tell him everything, not right now. Giving Alaric a child is me— more or less —flipping off Belial. I’m not sure if it makes sense to bring two unknowns into this world, but that’s for another day. A problem to address at a far later time.

Tali is the immediate threat, one that now I feel we are all on the same page with on how to end.

Kai leans forward, grabs under my thighs, and hoists me up.

I circle my legs around him, shifting to hold his neck and bury my face into his collar.

He moves us around the small island and toward the bathroom.

“We need to shower,” he whispers into my ear, keeping me held up with one hand while the other comes up and cups my cheek.

“We also need to feed, and then I’ll order some room service for you. ”

I nod, leaning my head into his open palm to rub my nose against it. His thumb draws under my eye, before venturing to the back of my head and threading his fingers through my hair.

I tilt my head up, meeting his impenetrable stare. He looks down at my lips quickly as I attempt to smile, to hopefully get one in return.

Unfortunately, he doesn’t give me one.

“Tell me something, little demon.” He sits me down onto the cold countertop in the small bathroom. His hand drifting under the slits of the dress and begins working it up and over my chest. “I’m only asking a question, don’t fucking freak out on me.”

Asshole . I wish he would’ve just asked. Now I am freaking out.

“If she kills me, you’d send her to the Beyond?”

The fabric moves over my head, and when my face reappears, his gaze drops.

“Oh, Xera, baby. Hey, hey…”

I feel a surge of horror at the very question, and I’m sure my expression mirrors that exact thought. “It won’t happen. She’s not stupid.” My tone is strained. “Don’t fucking mention it again.”

He moves his hands to fix my hair, which I can feel is a mess. The deep frown on his lips and his wandering eyes—no, I know exactly what he’s thinking.

“No!” I shout. “It’s not a question. It’s not even a poss?—”

His kiss against my mouth is gentle, but it cuts me off. “Okay,” he breathes against my lips before cradling my face in his hands. “Okay.”

Fear is exhausting.

Living without him is inconceivable.

Maybe we should just both die… Free us from this place.

At least then, we’d still be together.

In this life, and any of the ones after.