Page 65 of All Your Deadly Truths (The Filthy Duet #2)

Xeraphine

“ G ratias tibi ago . ”

Blinking away the tears and letting them stain my cheeks in a line leading straight to my self-pity, I brisk through the trees toward Alaric. Hearing Kairhyse screaming for me is destroying my Amoro, even if I’m washed over with gratitude.

“Gratias tibi ago.” My own voice flutters around in my head, but in a language that I don’t recognize. “Nostram . ” I’ve not had the chance to sit and talk with my Demon like Kayn had suggested, but now I think I’ll make that a priority if I get back.

When I get back…

“Utere me.”

I’ll also apparently need to learn whatever this language is. I have absolutely no clue what it’s saying.

Seeing white hair in the darkness of the forest, I slow my pace. I’ve drowned out Kai’s voice—unwilling to continue my own suffering. I’ve got to settle this with Belial, because I can’t have him coming to this world and trying to take what is mine .

Alaric’s shoulders slump as his head tilts toward the sky, a blanket of stars above us. I follow his gaze, and through the protective canopy of trees, I see the sky I know I won’t lay eyes on again until I return. A tight ache settles in my stomach with that realization.

Damn, I’m going to the Beyond .

Where the departed are dragged unrelentingly to their eternal damnation. I’d pleaded to my creator on so many occasions to take me away and save me from this world, but now I find myself less eager for such a fate.

I’m confident I’ll come back, but it doesn’t make the feeling any less poignant.

A bright light engulfs the Fallen, pulling my gaze down to him.

He holds his hand outstretched before him, and as I step closer, I watch in awe as a wrought-iron gate begins to materialize between the oak trees.

The scent of charcoal and burning metal fills the air, and as the left gate creaks open, the deep, grating sound of rusted hinges echoes around us.

I take a deep breath, not waiting for him to move. I don’t look back toward Kai and Sydni, toward the home I’ve just left. It’s more than just a place—it’s what I’ve been without for so many years.

No. It’s what I’ve been missing my entire life, and now I’m determined to hold onto it. For so long, revenge was the thing that fueled me, but now… it’s about protecting what I’ve put in harm’s way.

Bleh, what the fuck have I become ?

Fire builds in my chest, spreading down to my stomach, where a hollow ache opens up, warming my entire body.

I’m no hero. I’d rather watch the world I’m leaving behind burn to ash than let anything happen to them. I know I’m the cause of their suffering, and while I won’t deny that they’d have normal lives without me, I’m just as certain they couldn’t survive without me—just as I couldn’t without them.

The shift from reality is akin to stepping through a rushing waterfall, blurring the world around me as if pounding clear liquid blankets my vision.

There’s a heavy dampness, like icy needles pricking my skin—cold and sharp, but without the sensation of being wet, and a loud roaring symphony that drowns out everything until I’m smacked with silence.

When my eyes focus, both Alaric and I are standing in a lit hallway, fluorescent lights illuminating the space around us. Each door closed, signs hanging from them. The walls themselves are white, the doors all different colors, but the majority match the muted color.

It smells like pomegranates. Ironic , really.

“This could have been avoided,” Alaric comments as he steps forward, turning his head over his shoulder to look at me. “If you wouldn’t?—”

He doesn’t get the chance to finish his sentence before my fist connects with his nose.

I don’t give him a moment to recover as he stumbles back; my foot lands hard into his side, completing the fall.

He crashes onto his back, and the sharp sound of tile meeting bone makes my lip twitch in satisfaction.

As he grumbles, raising up on both hands to lift up to see me, I’m straddling his hips and slamming another punch to his face. His lip busts, and he roars out a muffled cry.

Both of his hands attempt to grab my waist, but I’m quickly tearing the skin from my wrist and thrusting it against his lips.

Blood splays across the icy floor, pooling in his mouth and down his jaw to his neck.

His eyes bulge, and I grin in response. He is a fucking fool if he thinks he will continue to talk to me as if I am a godsdamn child.

As if I am not a killer.

A monster.

A demon.

A fucking psychopath.

“This all could have been avoided,” I repeat mockingly.

“If you would learn your place .” My full weight rests on him, and as I feel my blood traverse slowly through his body, I roll my head around my shoulders before leaning fully forward onto him.

“I can feel myself inside you…” My breath fans against his lips. “Do you?”

My gaze trails to his mouth, seeing his nostrils flare as he says, “Yes.”

“Good boy.” Leaning back, I smack his cheek with enough force that he clenches his jaw. “Now, let’s play with my new puppet.”

“No, let’s not?—”

“Lift your left arm,” I command, and as I feel the tethers of his brain fight me back, I know I’ve got him. My Amoro may not be able to command a Fallen… but my blood can.

Perfect .

His body loses the battle, and his left arm goes straight into the air. I’d be enjoying this more if it weren’t for this asshole’s bulging erection pressing right between my ass cheeks.

“You know,” I murmur, my hand coming to the one he still has at my waist and thrusting it away. “The last man’s lap I sat in, who had a hard on, that wasn’t Kai, lost it. Then I made him eat it.”

“I heard…” he says through his teeth. “Are you done with this game?”

As I adjust myself to lay down on him, our chests press together and I glide my hand up his outstretched arm.

“I suspect my blood will leave your system relatively quickly—maybe half an hour.” This was my life before meeting Kairhyse.

Using my body to my advantage, and it never bothered me to do so.

Even if in this moment I’m doing what I’ve skillfully learned over the past decade to do, it hurts my Amoro—and me.

But I have to do what must be done, no matter how I feel.

“You’ve said this is bigger than you, then us , so let’s come to an agreement before we step to see the ruler of the Beyond, Alaric. ”

His bright blue eyes sink to half-mast, his breathing becoming more of a pant. I can smell what he wants, the desire that seeps from his pores, and feel the twitch in his cock.

“Go on. ”

“I am not a toy, not something to play with. I’m not a fucking pig at an auction used to breed to have the farm thrive. Just nod if you understand.”

Only a second passes before he nods his head once. My fingers lace with his, the one still held up, and bring it down.

“All I want is to be free. Free of the constant burden of fighting for the one basic right I was born with: to live. You, my mother, Belial—everyone is selfish with my body, my life.”

His mouth opens to speak, but I cut him off, “Silence, Alaric.”

With my free hand, I grip his throat—tightening just enough to be a threat, but not enough to cut off his breath. “You… are selfish , but we can change that.”

His eyes narrow, and I hate that his excitement is growing.

“You belong… to me, loyal to me . If you even want a sliver of a chance with your revenge…” I can see in his eyes he feels the doubt in my words. It isn’t the influx or change in demeanor, but it’s how I’ve phrased it.

“With your revenge ” not “with me” .

“You will bow to me when I say bow, without question. Even over Belial.”

I know he wants to laugh, the slight roll of his eyes and very minimal shake of his head all-telling. However, I’m not really going to give him a choice.

“I’ve seen obsession, felt it in the best ways possible but also in the worst ways imaginable.

” A shutter rolls down my spine at the thought of Lars, but I don’t let it fester.

I don’t give myself the moment to think beyond the layers of reality before me.

“I see your obsession, but it isn’t with me , it’s with your revenge. I’ve seen—no, I’ve felt it.”

He stays silent, his hand still laced with mine, tightening its grip.

“I will only ever be owned by one person, in this life, and the next. Until there is no mind or body left. Whether his death comes before mine, or mine before his. Nod if you understand that man is Kairhyse.”

This time, he waits, and I can only assume it is to digest what I’ve said. Attraction, need, desire; it’s what he feels. None of it is love, want, or a need for me . I’m a body, even to Alaric, just as I am to everyone.

Everyone but Kai. My monster.

After another minute passes in silence that not even a door opens to break, he nods his head.

“Now that we understand each other…” I sigh and close my eyes, realizing that with this demand of his loyalty, I’m condemning myself to a lifetime at his beck and call.

That doing this will solidify at some point in time, I will have to aid him with his revenge.

This won’t be a debt, but an annoyance in my eternity I will have to deal with at a later time .

As I once helped Tyson when he needed it the most, I know I’ll be helping this piss stain all the same.

“Do I have your loyalty to me , Alaric? Speak with words.”

When I look at him, I pull the aura of his singular answer, seeing the truth behind them.

“Yes, to you, Xeraphine.”

I release his hand and shift from his lap, standing without his intervention to help or do something more personable. When he gets back, he can go to Niyla to fix the hard-on he’s sporting.

“While we are at it… hit Kairhyse again and I’ll remove your cock and force Niyla to eat it before killing her. Understand?”

He clears his throat, coming to stand. “You love feeding people appendages, don’t you.” It really isn’t a question, so I don’t entertain an answer. “Yes, understood.”

“Good, now, which room?” I ask while adjusting my top, wiping the blood from my healed wrist.

He brushes himself off, and drags the back of his hand across his nose. He doesn’t get nearly all the blood off, but at least it isn’t pouring down his lips anymore.

“ He opened the gate directly in front of reception.”

My eyebrow pops up and when I look at the door closest to us, it sure as shit says ‘Reception’ right on it. “Where exactly is this?”

“It has many names.” He clears his throat, and I can tell his submission to me is sitting uneasily with him. He enjoyed it, no matter how much his male brain tries to argue.

Little bitch , just admit you are a bottom. I’d say he is lucky I have no desire for him—I’d probably break his sensitive ass.

“Crossroads, Expressway—it has even been called the Path to the Beyond. It’s just a hallway to me.” He places his hand onto the handle of the door, and just before he pushes it down, I place mine over his.

His gaze meets mine as I ask, “What does he look like?” The last time I went seeking out my family, it hadn’t ended well for me.

“He has many forms, just depends on what he wants you to see.”

I wouldn’t say I’m nervous, not even scared. It’s a sensation of anticipation, which can feel the same as being fearful of what’s to come.

Nodding, I remove my hand and he opens the door for us.

I’m not sure what I was expecting, to be honest, but this definitely isn’t it.

I’d classify it as bizarre, maybe even unsettling.

It’s as though time stands still. The walls are a dull, sickly green, flickering under a buzz of old fluorescent lights that cast an unnatural glow.

The room is filled, all the seats taken by the dead , each of them bearing the peculiar signs of their death—ghostly, pale skin, others with limbs twisted, even a man with half his body burnt.

The furniture is worn and mismatched, a threadbare chair and sagging couch that squeaks as a woman with a missing leg and arm shifts.

“I swear I’ve seen a movie like this before…” I whisper. The atmosphere feels thick with tension, as if the room itself is holding its breath, waiting for me to make a move.

Alaric takes hold of my elbow and gently pulls me toward the opposite wall of where we entered. “Everything fictional derives from reality, Xeraphine.”

He stops us in front of what I assume is the receptionist’s window. I’m unable to see anything as there is a thick cloud of smoke, and the pungent smell of nicotine seeping through a crack that I can tell was made by a fist slamming into it.

Just as I’m reaching out to knock, Alaric puts his hand up, ceasing me. “Take a ticket.” He points then to a red box with a yellow ticket sticking out of it.

“You’ve got to be fucking with me.”

He groans, “Belial is?—”

“Full of himself?” I snarl. “I’m not waiting in fucking line. He called me here.”

“You ain’t that important!” a man with a heavy drawl to his tone yells from behind me. “Take a numba, just like the rest of us.”

“Shut up, man, don’t you see what she is?” another male says in a hushed tone.

As my nose twitches, I shift my gaze around the room. No one had given me a second glance when we walked in, but now, all dozen or so set of eyes are on me.

“Ya in the wrong room anyway, bitch,” the woman with the missing leg says with a slithering lisp. “Proserpina is down the hall.”

I tear away my arm from Alaric and hiss, “So loud for being the dead . What’s your hurry?” I drag my eyes from one side to the other, and snarl. “Can’t die of boredom…” The slow grin is met with distasteful frowns. “Time is meaningless to the dead, so shut the fuck up and mind your own business.”

Turning away from them, I pound against the glass. “Hey, let me see Belial,” I shout, but don’t see any movement behind the cloud of smoke. “I’m not fucking waiting when I was summoned here! Gods?—”

“You won’t find those here.” A thick voice filters into my ears, and it’s familiar. So much so, my breath gets caught in my throat. Shifting slowly as he continues, my eyes round into complete circles. “You were always so impatient, and a bitch, but would I have wanted you any other way?”

When his bright hazel eyes plastered on dark skin grace my vision, I struggle to breathe.

No way…

“Not really,” he continues. “It’s what made you, you.”

His bright white smile hidden behind his ebony lips, tells me he isn’t meant to be here. Everyone in this room shows evidence of their death, he looks as though he just walked out of the shower, dressed and ready for a date.

“It’s good to see you.” He steps closer, and I move back right into Alaric’s chest.

“Tyson? What in the Beyond are you doing here?”