Page 13 of A Maid of No Consequence (Pride and Prejudice Variation)
EVERY IMPULSE OF FEELING
T hey spoke little on their return to the inn, and after gathering Sarah, Reggie, and the valises, they were back on the road to Lambton.
Reading was out of the question, as the road here was very rough, and Elizabeth began pondering what it would be like meeting her sister for the first time in five years, and seeing Jane as a married woman and stepmother to three children.
Once Sarah had fallen into a sleep next to her on the well-stuffed velvet squabs of Darcy’s carriage, Elizabeth’s thoughts drifted and she found herself thinking on the morning’s conversation.
It was a conundrum to be sure, as she long ago had been frustrated with Mr Darcy, and then so hurt by him.
Now she was embarrassed that he discovered her to be in service.
Yet, in their past few exchanges, there was neither frustration, hurt, or embarrassment—only deep and revealing conversation with a man who loved and grieved and worried.
She used to think him so cold, distant, and incapable of deep feeling.
His letter had altered her impression of him five years ago, but today she was seeing him in a different light, the light of who he was now, not skewed by her poor perception and the lies of a blackguard whom she so shamefully had believed.
The man leading her to Lambton was neither proud nor grim nor cruel, but full of feeling, depth, and warmth.
She glanced out the window to watch him; he had chosen to ride this morning.
He had a fine seat, and made a handsome image.
In fact, if she let romantic thoughts creep in, much like the fairy tale stories Sarah droned on about, Elizabeth could see him as a knight in shining armour, sitting straight and proud, looking for a damsel to save.
Mr Darcy turned just then to look at the carriage, and their eyes met.
She gasped and sat back quickly . Yes, I feel very much the damsel being saved.
By the time the second day of their journey ended at another coaching inn, Elizabeth was ready for an early bed.
She sat again with Mr Darcy at supper; conversation was becoming easier between them, leaving behind their past hurts and talking of more commonplace subjects.
Not only was she seeing a different side of him, but she was feeling less defensive, more gracious, less self-conscious about her change in circumstances.
She shuddered to think what would have happened to her had Mr Darcy not come along when he did.
“How is your stew?” he enquired. “Is it to your liking?”
It took her a moment to respond. “It is the best stew I have had today, Mr Darcy.” She raised her brow to him, and gave a slight grin. “But I must say, in all honesty, it is these warm rolls and butter which bring me comfort.” She pulled apart the bread and added a little more butter .
Mr Darcy took a roll for himself. “Mrs Reynolds, the housekeeper at Pemberley, would say you have the right of it. She is always bringing Cook a variety of bread receipts to try, ones filled with nuts and cinnamon, others with savoury herbs. London may boast of its inns and eating establishments, but they have nothing on Pemberley. Everything prepared and served at my table is of the utmost quality. It is one of the things I genuinely miss when I am away.”
She smiled. “You have very strong opinions, sir.”
“I do.” He gave her a look of such warmth that it flustered her. She had to turn away, casting about in her mind for a different subject.
“Has Mrs Reynolds long been your housekeeper?”
“For most of my life. I owe much of the success of the running of the household to her.” He looked at her then as if an idea had just struck him.
“Would you be so kind as to come to my home to dine? With your sister and her husband, of course. It would be my honour to have your family as my guests. And I would very much like you to see Pemberley, and most of all, the library.”
An invitation to Pemberley! She must not allow this easy nature between them to be construed for something it was not. He was merely being polite, was he not?
“The library? Is it your favourite room in Pemberley?”
He nodded. “I count it an honour to add to my father and grandfather’s extensive collection as I can.
It is, in my opinion, an excellent room, and has seen generations of Darcys sit comfortably with a glass of claret in one hand and a good book in the other.
The fireplace is like no other I have seen. ”
“You seem quite enamoured of it.”
“My home is indeed very special to me. It is all I have ever known.” He stopped briefly and lowered his voice. “But forgive me, I do not wish to pain you.”
“I do not take offence at the pride you have in your home, Mr Darcy. Longbourn was all I had ever known as well,” she said with a wistful smile. “But it was very different…after. It was a house, but not my home.”
“I understand,” he said. “But in any case, I hope I can persuade you to come?”
She looked down at her plate, thinking of the awkwardness of such an evening. A cobbler and the Master of Pemberley at the same table? “Do you make a custom of dining with the shopkeepers in Lambton?”
There was a prolonged silence. At length he said, “Perhaps I should.”
She gave a little laugh as she raised her eyes to tease him. “Sir, you are too good. Rescuing me from evil and now leading a class revolt on my behalf. Such gallantry is not often seen in these modern times.”
He said nothing in reply to her teasing, only heaved a great sigh. She smiled ruefully in reply to it, regretting that once this memorable journey had concluded, they each would resume their respective stations. Anything else was unimaginable.
“You must be anxious to see your sister,” Mr Darcy said, apparently also wishing to leave the difficult subject behind.
With relief she agreed. “I admit, I have thought of little else since leaving London. It has been such a long time. I do not wish to presume, but will we be in Lambton tomorrow?”
He nodded, “It is another very long day I am afraid, and we will need to start even earlier, but yes, my hope is for you to be in the care of your sister by the late afternoon. ”
That evening, Elizabeth was sitting by the fire, brushing her hair, as Sarah turned down the covers on the bed they would share.
“You and Mr Darcy,” Sarah said, sighing. “You and he make a handsome pair.”
Elizabeth could feel her face flush with warmth. “He is a friend. Merely a friend.”
“The way he looks at you is not merely as a friend.”
“There is nothing between us but your wishful fancies, and your love of romantic stories. There can be nothing more.”
“And why not?” Sarah stood with her hands on her hips.
“How can you ask such a question? I am what I am.” Looking down at the borrowed dress she had been wearing all day, Elizabeth said, “I may be dressed as something more, but you and I both know that just days ago I was a maid. A servant. And even if I were not—” She shook her head, thinking of her horrible words to him, after his rather terrible proposal.
“Mr Darcy is so far above me. He would never consider me as anything more.”
Sarah came and sat next to Elizabeth. “I cannot agree with you. Mr Darcy behaves like a man in love. It is in his every look. Just like it is with me and Reggie.”
The housemaid and the groom were opposites to each other, yet Elizabeth knew there was true affection between them. “You want everyone to have a beau, Sarah, just like you!”
“Reggie is not my knight in shining armour, but he is sweet on me. And he cares for me. I’ve never had that in my life.”
“Well, I am happy for you both. And I suppose all three of us are putting our trust in Mr Darcy to see us all in a new position in life.” Elizabeth sighed deeply and then looked over at Sarah. “Does the uncertainty of it, not knowing where you are to go, frighten you?”
“When I first left the Pollards,” she said the name with a certain amount of unbridled disgust, “I didn’t care where I went, only that I would go, for you. I am that glad that I came. I trust Mr Darcy. There is goodness in him. Do you?”
It took Elizabeth a moment to reply. “I do not find it easy to trust anyone.” Giving Sarah her best mischievous look, she continued, “But perhaps upon seeing his grand home in Derbyshire, I shall be fully convinced.”
This made them both laugh and lightened the mood.
“All will be well, Miss Bennet ,” Sarah said in a tone that so well mimicked Mr Darcy, Elizabeth smiled and rolled her eyes.
Sarah continued, “I believe in fairy tales, yes. But I believe that good things happen too. And Eliza, Mr Darcy is a good thing. A very good thing.”