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Chapter Four

Christian

I wrap Miles in my arms. This hug is about to get awkward in about four seconds but I don't fucking care. My best friend is here, in my arms, after a year of being apart. The only thing that could stop me from hugging him is if this alien planet started shaking. Or if pigs started falling from the sky. Even then I probably wouldn’t let go.

“Jesus,” Miles says, holding me just as tightly. “I’m so fucking glad you’re here, Christian. I know you hate when I get all sappy on you but I’ve missed you so much.”

“I missed you too,” I tell him, burying my face against his shoulder. I know Timalah is standing right next to Miles, holding their daughter but I can’t bring myself to let go and greet them properly. Not yet.

“Okay, okay,” Miles says, being the one to pull away. “I know how much you hate this mushy stuff.”

I look at him. “You can be as mushy as you want to be, it’s okay.”

Miles blinks slowly, looking up at Timalah before looking back at me. “What have you done with my Christian?”

“I have so much to talk to you about,” I say instead of responding to his joke. Then I look up at Timalah. “Hi, Timalah. It’s really fucking good to see you again.”

“I am glad you are here,” he says with a nod.

“And how is my godson? Jesus, he’s grown! He looks like he’s ready to head off to his accounting job anyday!”

Timalah tilts his head to the side. “I don’t know what this accounting is but our son does not have a job yet. He is only two years of age, Christian.”

My chest feels lighter than it has in years.

It might be the therapy I made myself go through while back on Earth or it might just be the fact that I’m back here, with my best friend.

Or maybe it was watching Gendry and Aldo bring a new life into the world together on the trip here.

Whatever the reason, I feel so goddamn happy.

Happier than I’ve been in a really, really long time.

It’s wild what an entire year can change. When I left this place, I was certain I’d never feel like I belonged. I had to unpack a lot of my past trauma, face it head on, and somehow I’ve come out the other side feeling better than ever.

By no means am I perfect. You don’t heal in a day. It takes work and time, but I’m on the path of healing from my past hurts. I’m tired of being the guy who pushes everyone away. It’s time that I took a chance at letting people in, starting with my best friend.

“I’ve missed you guys,” I say before looking at Druim.

He babbles, his face split into a wide grin.

Half of his words don’t make sense but a few fly through that I catch like hi and bee and Dada .

He’s got the most adorable chubby cheeks and his skin is just as golden as I remember.

“I’ve missed you, Corn. I’m your godfather,” I tell him, reaching out and taking his little hand in mine, giving it a little shake. “It’s lovely to re-meet you.”

“Why are you being so cheery? I’m not complaining,” Miles says, raising his hands in surrender. “I’m just really confused.”

“Don’t worry, I’ll be back to my asshole self shortly. I think I’m just in shock that we’re together again, that’s all.”

“Right,” Miles says slowly, nodding his head. “Makes sense. Some people go into shock and shut down. You go into shock and turn into sunshine personified.”

I narrow my eyes at him, my smile falling away. I cross my arms over my chest. “I wouldn’t go that far.”

“Oh good. There you are. I was worried they somehow replaced you on the spaceship.”

“You’re such a dick.”

Miles grins. “I know! But you love me!”

“I do,” I say, rolling my eyes. I wrap my arm around Miles’ shoulders, guiding him out of the crowd and towards the road that leads to our homes.

There’s supposed to be a night of celebration, but all I want to do is get back home and get myself settled.

I want to toss my things in my cabin before going back to Miles’ place that he shares with his mate and his child.

I want to sit on the couch together and catch up.

I want to see if things have changed or if they’re exactly as I remember them.

“You don’t want to stay?”

“Can we just go back home? I want to hear about everything that’s happened while I was gone.”

Miles and Timalah share a look before Miles is nodding. “Okay, you can come back to ours. Maybe you can even stay the night. It’ll be like old times,” Miles says with a grin.

“I think I can manage to walk across the street at the end of the night,” I say with a snort. “Just because I’ve been gone a year doesn’t mean I’ve lost the ability to find my way back home.”

“Sure. Right. Of course,” Miles says with a chuckle that sounds completely out of character. I’m about to call him out on the weirdness when Timalah jumps in.

“Thank you for keeping an eye on Gendry while he was gone.”

“It wasn’t difficult. Though it was surprising when he fell for Aldo. The first day they met, he was head over heels almost instantly. It would have been all kinds of adorable if it wasn’t so nauseatingly sweet.”

“There you are,” Miles says, chuckling to himself. “Still not sold on the whole love thing?”

My heart skips a beat as one face comes to mind. My lips are still tingling from the quick kiss I gave Ghenie. As happy as I am to be back with Miles, I can’t stop thinking about when I can slip away and try to find Ghenie again. I need to talk to him and the sooner I can do that, the better.

We step into Miles’ and Timalah’s house. Timalah takes Druim into his room while Miles and I go to the couch. I toss my shit onto the floor, feeling the weariness of travel wash over me. It’s nice to be in a comfortable, homey space again.

“I’m not so sure anyone really wants to love me ,” I say, finally answering Miles’ question. “But I’m not as against it as I was in the past. I don’t know. It’s complicated. I’m really fucked up, Miles.”

Miles freezes, turning to face me. “Don’t say that.”

I shrug. “It’s true. A lot of shit happened when I was a kid that fucked me up.”

Miles opens his mouth so say something before snapping his mouth shut again. He processes what I’ve said. “That’s not your fault, Miles.”

“It’s not and I know that a lot better now. That doesn’t mean it didn’t happen and it certainly doesn’t mean I’m not dealing with the fallout still to this day.”

Miles’ eyes dart between my own. “Jesus, you really have changed.”

I rub the back of my neck, staring down at my feet.

All of those insecurities and hurts threaten to choke me all over again.

I’m allowed to let people in. I’m allowed to let Miles in.

Out of everyone, he’s the one person I’ve let in.

He loves me. I repeat this over and over in my head, desperately working on believing it.

“Hopefully for the better,” I finally say. “I know I’ve never talked about it but my childhood was kinda fucked up. My parents were gone all the time.”

“Fuck,” Miles breathes out.

“Yeah. Umm, substance abuse. I stayed with my grandmother but she died. And then I hopped couches. Eventually I just got a place of my own. Told everyone I was eighteen, got a fake ID. It really screwed up my outlook on life for a really long time.”

“Jesus, Christian.” Miles pulls me into a fierce hug. I return it despite the way it’s making me uncomfortable. Telling people makes me feel like they pity me, or maybe they’ll think I should have gotten over it by now. If Miles thought that, I think it would break me.

“I’m really sorry you had to go through that.”

“Thanks,” I say, finally pulling back. “I just.” I swallow. “Everyone in my life has left me. Always. You were the first person to stick around.”

“I’m here to stay, for as long as you’ll have me. You’re my best friend and I love you.”

“Love you too,” I say, looking up at the ceiling. I feel flayed open and exposed in the worst possible way. It’s so gross, the way I have to heal and make myself better based on things that were completely out of my control. “Okay, way too mushy. I feel icky.”

Miles bursts out laughing and I can’t help but mirror his smile. I curl my legs onto the couch, getting comfy.

“Fill me in,” I say. “I want to hear all the piping hot tea.”

“Oh umm, not that much? I guess?”

“Is that a question or a statement?”

“It’s a statement?”

I turn fully on the couch so I can face my best friend. I watch his face closely. He can’t seem to look at me and he looks guilty as hell. What’s going on? Why is he lying to me?

“What’s going on? What aren’t you telling me?”

“I have no idea what you mean, Christian!”

“I know you, Miles. You’re lying. What are you lying about?”

“I don’t like that you can see right through me,” Miles says with a grumble. “Something happened. I don’t really know how to tell you.”

“Okay,” I say slowly. My stomach is a mess of nerves as my mind comes up with the worst possible scenarios. Did someone fucking die? Did another alien race show up? Are we being evicted from our homes? What the hell is going on?

“It’s about your house,” Miles says slowly. “Someone moved in while you were gone.”

“Oh,” I breathe out. “Okay. That’s not the worst news, I guess. I thought you were about to tell me we were in active war with another alien race and you and I were going to be forced to become warriors.”

“What?”

“I’m just saying!”

Miles shakes his head. “You’re ridiculous.”

“Thank you,” I say, puffing up my chest.

Timalah comes back into the room with a freshly changed Druim. The little guy is up and running around the house. I don’t understand how that can even be possible! He should still be a swaddled little thing hanging from Timalah’s hip, right?

“Hey, lil Corn Man,” I say, holding out my hands for him.

Druim picks up a toy from the corner of the room and starts running towards me.

Then he stops a few feet away, cocks his little arm back, and yeets the toy at me.

I’m so unprepared that I don’t get my hands up in time.

The toy smacks the side of my head. Hard .