Page 10

“They’re exactly where I need them to be.” He reaches over and takes my hand in his own. Tingles run up and down my arm at the simple touch and my stomach flips, but this time it’s not from nerves, it’s from excitement. “Come. I have the perfect place in mind.”

I’m powerless to do anything but follow, doing my best to hold on to hope that this is the time to talk things out instead of break things off. I want anything and everything that Ghenie is willing to offer, now I just need to convince him to offer it.

I know where we’re going before we get there.

The sun is starting to set, leaving the sky brilliant tones of orange and red which reflect off the water.

It’s magical and dare I admit; romantic .

Normally, I would find that gross but for Ghenie, I keep my lips sealed.

He deserves romance and affection and feeling gross over.

He deserves vulnerability even if it makes my skin crawl a little bit.

“I hope this is okay,” he says softly, kicking off his shoes and walking into the sand. The sand is warm against my bare feet. “I thought there would be no better place to have this conversation.”

“This is more than okay.”

Somehow, we’re in the same place where I first admitted to myself that I had feelings for Ghenie. We sit in the sand, looking out across the water as the sun slowly sets. It’s beautiful. I turn and look at Ghenie. He is beautiful.

“Christian,” Ghenie starts but I reach over, placing my hand on his thigh.

“Can I start? Please?”

Ghenie nods his head, touching the back of my hand. A shiver runs through me. The gentle gesture makes that knot in my chest loosen ever so slightly.

“I’m all sorts of messed up,” I say finally, getting the words to start flowing.

“My parents left a lot when I was little. It took me a long time to realize neglect is abuse and it took me even longer to admit to myself that I was abused. I don’t let people in because the people who’re supposed to be there for me always left.

Always. It didn’t matter if I begged or cried or held on to their pant leg.

No matter what, they’d push me off and leave for their next score.

I jumped from home to home, stayed with my grandmother for a while but that only lasted so long before she died. ”

My free hand digs into the sand, letting the grains fall through my fingers. I don’t look at Ghenie, can’t. If I look at him, the words might stop and then all of this will have been for nothing.

“I learned to rely on no one but myself. I stopped smiling, stopped caring. I closed myself off because then I knew I couldn’t get hurt.

And then I met Miles.” I shake my head as a small smile lifts the sides of my lips.

“That bastard wouldn’t let me shut him out.

He started to form cracks in my perfectly built wall.

That wall was hit with a fucking wrecking ball when I met you.

It was terrifying, the way I wanted to let you in but I just couldn’t.

So I ran as fast as I could, as far as I could.

It was safer to run because it was me leaving instead of being the one left behind again. ”

My eyes are suspiciously watery and my chest feels like it’s been cracked open for Ghenie to see. I hate it. I hate this. I suck in a shaky breath, trying to keep my composure.

“I started seeing a therapist back on Earth and worked through some of this shit. I have a ways to go, but the whole healing thing has started. This is a lot to drop at once and I can’t promise I’m all better or whatever.

I’m still fucked up. I still hate all this mushy gushy shit.

I hate talking about my feelings but,” I pause to take another shaky breath.

I force myself to look up at Ghenie. “But you’re worth it. ”

Tears fall from Ghenie’s eyes, running down his cheeks as he looks at me. Fuck. I didn’t mean to make him cry!

“Shit. Sorry. Maybe I shouldn’t have said anything.”

Ghenie turns to me fully. He brings his hands to my face, cupping my cheeks. “You have nothing to apologize for. Nothing .”

The fierceness of his response leaves me speechless. All I can do is nod slightly.

“I am so sorry you went through that, but this only makes my heart long for you more. You have gone through hardships no one should go through and yet, you have been brought through to the other side a stronger man. You have worked on yourself and allowed yourself to come back, to come back to me . I cannot promise to never hurt you but I can promise to never intentionally hurt you. And I can promise I will never leave you, for as long as you will have me, it would be my honor to spend my days at your side.”

All of my breath leaves me at once. The tears I’ve been desperately trying to hold back fall against my permission. Ghenie’s thumbs rub them away for me. He looks at me like I’m precious, like I’m worth something. Maybe I am. Maybe I am worthy of his love.

His hands are so big against my face, making me feel small. I’m cracked open and exposed, but Ghenie doesn’t just hold my face, he holds my heart in his hands. I know he’ll be gentle. I know that I can trust him, the same way I eventually learned to trust Miles.

“So,” I say slowly, my eyes finally meet his pale ones. “Now you know.”

“Now I know,” he repeats, just barely above a whisper. “And I am not going anywhere.”

I move forward and Ghenie follows me. Our foreheads press together.

I close my eyes, breathing the same air as him, letting his soft confession wash over me.

It takes everything I have to let the words sink in.

It takes even more to actually believe them, not because I mistrust Ghenie but because it’s hard for me to see myself as someone worth staying for.

“Christian?”

“Yeah?”

“May I kiss you? I have been dreaming of it for years. I had one taste of you and now, I fear I will never be sated.”

My heart aches . I’ve never been a guy interested in romance or love or affection, but with Ghenie, everything feels different. His words are like a balm that’s helping soothe my very soul, healing wounds I didn’t even know I had.

Instead of answering with words, I lean forward and kiss Ghenie’s lips. Everything has led to this moment and for that reason alone, I can’t be upset by the ups and down because this has all been worth it. Kissing Ghenie is everything. My head feels light and my heart feels full.

His lips fit perfectly against my own. Ghenie tilts his head, slotting us together even more comfortably. When he opens his lips, mine part as well, allowing his tongue in. The taste of him is even better than I remember.

Ghenie’s hand cups my face as we exchange slow, deep kisses.

Our tongues tangle, our breath mingles. Not only does my body long for him, but so does my very soul.

It aches for him in a way I’ve never felt before.

The Layperry people believe that there is one person out there designed especially for them; their mate.

In this moment, I’m not sure if I subscribe to the same belief but it’s hard to argue when everything inside of me is screaming at me that Ghenie is mine .

Ghenie is the one who pulls away, resting his forehead against my own.

We stay like that for a long time. I feel connected to him and I can’t stop thinking about all the ways I want to make things up to him, to let him know that I’m serious about this relationship, serious about him.

I never want him to go another day wondering if he’s cared for.

I might not do all that mushy shit but that doesn’t mean I won’t put in the work to let Ghenie know I’m his.

“My plan was for us to speak and then take a dip in the water,” Ghenie says slowly, “but I’m suddenly feeling something else. I think I will go pick up Maribel now. You can meet me back at the house. Once she’s asleep, I would very much like to take you to bed.”

“Take me to bed?”

Ghenie raises his brow at me and it suddenly hits me.

“Oh? Oh! Yeah, umm. Okay. Go pick up our daughter.”

Ghenie’s features all turn soft at that. He leans forward and kisses my lips again. “I love it when you call her that,” he confesses before standing up and pulling me with him. I just barely keep myself from full on running back to the house.

This time is going to be different. This is the first time we’ll be coming together as two people who care about each other instead of a last ditch effort before I run. This time is the first time that’ll start the rest of our relationship and I want it to be special.