Page 128 of Terror at the Gates

“Are you going to the funeral today?”

Her voice was quieter than usual.

“No,” I said. “But I think I will go see Gabriel and Liam this morning.”

I’d been toying with the idea, but there was so much about going that made me anxious. It wasn’t just about facing the shame I felt at having abandoned Gabriel. Mylast visit was fueled by adrenaline and a determination to prove Esther had been murdered. This time, I had nothing to distract me from the truth.

Coco’s shoulders fell, empathy etched into the furrow of her brows and the press of her lips.

“I’m sure he would love to see you,” she said.

I swallowed hard, not nearly as certain as Coco.

“Do you want me to go with you?” she asked.

“No, that’s okay,” I said. Selfishly, I wanted to go alone in case I lost the courage and backed out. “You should finish getting ready.”

“Okay,” she said, smiling gently. “If you change your mind, let me know.”

“Thanks, Coco,” I said. “You’re the best.”

When she left, I got myself together. Once I laced my boots, I slipped into my holster, which was more like a vest made from leather straps. I didn’t always use this one, but it had space for me to loop the dagger. Now that I knew what it really was, I didn’t feel comfortable leaving it behind when I wasn’t home.

Though I never left my apartment unarmed, there was something strange about reaching for my weapons when I was only going to see a baby. Still, I pushed through my discomfort, knowing the real danger was the walk there and back.

I put on my jacket and gave Cherub a couple head scratches before heading out.

It had rained at some point, and the sidewalks were slick. The clouds still hung low, heavy with the threat of another storm. As fitting as this weather was, Esther deserved sunshine for her last day on earth. If I could control the weather like the matriarch of the Viridian family or her daughters, I would part this dark sky as a final goodbye, but I hadnothing to offer, at least in the way of magic, and asking for a favor was out of the question.

The Viridians were rule followers. Even if there was potential to save hundreds of lives, their matriarch would not act if her husband and Archbishop Lisk said no.

Plus, they hated me.

At the sound of thunder rumbling somewhere in the distance, I pulled my hood up and walked with my head down. I made it to Gabriel’s building just as it began to rain and let myself in. As soon as the elevator doors closed, my heart started pounding.

I knocked when I arrived at his door and waited in the musty hallway. I couldn’t hear anything from inside the apartment and wondered briefly if Gabriel was even home, but then the lock clicked. I held my breath as the door opened, thinking it might keep me from bursting into tears.

Except it wasn’t Gabriel who answered.

It was Zahariev, and I had an entirely different reaction to him.

My whole bodyblushed.

“What are you doing here?” My voice was sharper than I intended, but honestly, I’d hoped to avoid him until the gala tonight.

“I’m trying to help Gabriel so he can get ready for the funeral.”

“Oh,” I said. Of course. Because he was actually a good friend. “This is probably a bad time—”

“It’s not a bad time,” Zahariev said, interrupting me. “Come in.”

He held the door open for me, and I only hesitated for a second before slipping past him, pausing in the entryway.

The apartment was darker than usual. Gabriel haddrawn the blinds, something Esther rarely did, especially on rainy days. She preferred the view and the natural light. It also smelled different, but that was probably because every time I visited, Esther was cooking or baking or making something.

I knew she was gone, but the changes were a harsh reminder that this was no longer my safe place.

“Are you all right?” Zahariev asked. His hand came to rest lightly on the small of my back.