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“The sheets are in my closet. By the door.”

Again, I walked in his closet and stopped just inside the door, taking my time to let my eyes rake over everything in that area before a sigh of relief pushed past my lips.

I sent him a message telling him thanks and went to make up the bed. When I was done, I checked my messages again and frowned at the new voice note he’d sent.

“Is everything okay? Did something happen?”

Like hell was I telling him. I’d admit to pissing on his Egyptian cotton sheets before I ever told him what really happened. Instead of answering him, I typed out a message to Ms. Annie

Me:

Morning Ms. Annie, I’m running late this morning. Can you feed Duchess for me? I got her some new food yesterday. It’s in the break room

I was just about to get in the shower and wash away my shame when my phone vibrated. That was weird. Ms. Annie usually read the message but never responded.

My eyes swelled when I saw Greyson’s contact was still open and I sent him the message.

Grey:

Duchess?? The cat has a name? What the hell, Noah

Me:

Fuck. I didn’t mean to send you that. Ignore it

Grey:

Me:

It’s nothing. She just prefers dry food in the morning.

Grey:

…

Me:

Glad we had this talk.

With that, I tossed my phone on my bed and went back in my bathroom to wash my dreams away and get ready for the day. If I ignored what I’d done while I was sleeping, it wasn’t real and it couldn’t mean anything in the light of day.

“So much for starting my day on a high note,” I scoffed, flinging the vibrating wand away from me and listening as it plopped against the quilt at the foot of my bed.

I was disgusted with the orgasm that had just fluttered through me. Actually, calling it an orgasm was offensive to the other orgasms I’d had in my life. Calling it an orgasm was a slap in the face to the wand that had brought me to toe-curling pleasure many times over.

No, that wasn’t an orgasm.Whateverit was was pathetic and left me feeling more unsatisfied than I was when I started.

I missed having someone inside of me. I missed someone holding me down while they fucked into me with abandon. Imissed being worshiped and used, fucked nastily and adored in the same breath. I missed somebody wanting me andshowingit.

I didn’t know when my sex drive had re-entered the building, but after a year of grief clouding every other emotion I had, I was glad to have her back. Now, I just needed to find a better way to take care of my needs.

Luckily, I had a date tonight.

After a week on the apps, I finally nailed down prospects after mining through no less than fifty “wyd” and “send me a pic not on your profile” messages. Was this how men in their 30s approached dating? None of them had liked it very much when I sent a picture of my upcoming phone bill.

But Keenan and Xavier had stood out.

And I needed one of them to tick at least a few of my boxes for a good hookup. Keenan was first up; a firefighter who was five years older than me. Hopefully that five years had gifted him with theumphI was looking for.