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“I almost felt guilty for her hand going down my boxers,” Sidney snorts. “None of us were very interested in sex back then.”

“I’m… getting there,” Andrya admits with a small smile. “The point is it’s braver to stick it out, to live each day even though it hurts, then to walk off the cliff. We can’t always see that. I hear Kal was incredibly brave in his last moments, and the best way to honor him is to live since he can’t.”

I close my eyes, unable to fight the tears. “You all fight really fucking dirty,” I rasp.

“We’re not good people,” Isaac says. “We are, however, damn good people to have in your corner. You’re stuck with us, your mistress, and the damn dog collar.”

I sputter out a laugh even as my chest heaves with sobs. Burying my face in Silla’s neck, I allow myself to feel every fucked up thing I buried yesterday. Her jasmine scent wraps around me, helping me remember what I have to live for. My mistress holds me tightly, her warm tears hitting my skin. Hands touch my back, and they let me cry, no judgments.

I’ll never be the same again. Sniffing, I lift my face realizing the weather is even colder, and the snow is falling harder.

“You’re not dressed for this weather, Mistress,” I grumble, trying to get up, but my foot keeps slipping.

Grayson and Isaac get up, hauling me onto my feet with Silla in my arms. “Thanks,” I grunt. “I couldn’t find purchase on the damn gravel.”

“That’s another reason I’m taking Silla over my knee tonight. I can see it now,Queen of Forbach sails over the cliff before her coronation.Gods, girl, you’re going to give me gray hair,” he grumbles as we start walking back. Sidney grabs my shovel, while Ayden picks up my bag. Andrya stops next to them, staring at the gravesite.

“Did your brother have a favorite type of flower?” Andrya asks, chewing on her lip.

Stopping next to her, finding comfort in Silla’s weight in my arms, I nod. “He loved daffodils,” I tell them. “They’re also my mother’s favorite flower, and it was nice that they shared that without realizing it.”

“Do you need to tell her?” Grayson asks, worry in his eyes.

“No, she’s deteriorating so rapidly, she sometimes wouldn’t know who we were,” I explain. “I’ll continue to visit her as usual, but telling her would simply confuse her.”

“I’m sorry,” he offers and I incline my head.

“We’ll come back in the spring and plant flowers for him, set up a headstone,” Sidney says with a nod. “The twins and I can replant every year, until they start coming back on their own.”

“I… thank you,” I say, my voice cracking in surprise and emotion.

“You’re adopted,” he shrugs, as if that explains everything, and maybe it does. The crunch under our feet is the only sound as we trek back to the car. Silla tries to convince me to put her down, but I refuse.

I just want to hold her for a bit as I come to terms with what I almost threw away.

Twenty-Eight

ISAAC

We’ve officially adopted Kenzo. I lean my head on my fist as I watch everyone sleep. It was almost eight in the morning by the time we got home to the apartment. We told him we’d go with him to pick up his stuff at his house tomorrow, since we plan to move into the castle tonight.

Silla is sprawled out over Kenzo, and he’s wrapped around her. Tonight was a lot. We were so close to losing both of them. Fuck, every time I begin to drift off to sleep, I imagine them both going off the side of the cliff. I’m with Grayson, I want to tan her ass red.

“Can’t sleep?” Ayden asks, yawning. I shake my head, scowling. “I can’t say the last twenty-four hours have been easy. I keep seeing this girl I used to know whenever I close my eyes. Andrya, Sidney, and I enjoyed partying hard before we started teaching at FRC, and the girl got turned around. She went right over the cliff, the screaming waking us all up. Fuck, Silla could have cut it too close.”

“Yep,” I grunt. “All I can see is Silla crushed by the waves and the cliff. I know she wasn’t thinking, but Gods, I’m so angry.”

“Silla knows,” Grayson says sleepily next to me. “You can be pissed, but changing what she did means we could have lost Kenzo. She doesn’t deserve to lose anyone else.”

“Why do you have to be so damn logical?” I complain, leaning into him.

He chuckles, hugging me. There’s so much body heat now, even without a heater, he fell asleep without a shirt. “We have a long day ahead of us, Baby,” Grayson reminds me. “What do you need to be able to fall asleep?”

“My brain won’t shut up.” I sigh. “I’m tired, but a doomsday reel plays every time I shut my eyes.”

“Why don’t we wear you out then,” he murmurs, pushing my shorts down my hips.

“They’ll… hear,” I whisper breathlessly as his hand wraps around my cock.