Page 56 of Ruled Out

I watch as a small crease forms between his brow, almost like he’s struggling to process or maybe even believe what I said.

“Are you telling me you’re still a virgin, Mia?”

I bite the inside of my cheek—hard. I know I shouldn’t be embarrassed, but I am. I’m twenty-two, and I still haven’t slept with anyone.

“I’ve messed around a bit,” I say, feeling kind of infantile in front of Jessie Callaghan—a man with experience.

He doesn’t say anything, just continues to stare at me, the furrow between his brows still there.

“Say something,” I plead, desperate for him to tell me it’s okay.

When a smile breaks out across his face, my face mirrors his own.

“Just to be clear, what you’re telling me is that no other guy has had the pleasure of having you beneath him in his bed?”

I shake my head and whisper, “No, not in any bed.”

His smile grows wider as he continues to hover over me. I want to check he’s not in pain like this, but if the look on his face is anything to go by, I know he’s doing just fine.

“Do you remember that time at the drive-in theater?” he asks.

I bite on my bottom lip, the best kind of nerves shooting through me. “Mmhmm.”

“I knew we couldn’t, but I wanted to take you right there and then. All I could think about was pushing your panties to one side and sliding inside.” He looks off to the side and shakes his head slowly. “Then my mom called, and we had to leave.”

“I remember,” I reply, pushing away the humiliating memories.

“Well, that’s not going to happen tonight, Sweetheart.”

“I hope not,” I tease.

He pulls back and stands from the bed, walking over to his bedroom door. Jessie reaches into the pocket of his sweatpants as he takes out his phone and tosses it, and I hear it land on something soft.

I giggle, and he turns back to face me, taking me in with a feral need in his eyes. A look similar to the one I saw in the closet at Riley’s Bar.

“Back then, I told you that I’d go at your pace. And nothing has changed.” He walks back over to the bed, but doesn’t climb on, instead dropping to his knees in front of me. “The only thing that has is the knowledge that I can never walk away from you again. I’ve tried staying away. I’ve tried putting distance between us. I’ve tried pretending like we don’t belong in each other’s lives. But we do, Mia. There’s too much of you flowing through my veins for us to be apart anymore. Time has only made me want you more than ever before.”

My heart goes from beating through my chest to almost stopping completely when he leans forward and wraps his hands around mine, pulling me to a sitting position in front of him.

When his fingers find the hem of my black sweater, every nerve fires off in my body, settling between my thighs.

“We’ve wasted enough time messing around. I want you in my life, in my bed, in my arms, if that’s what you want too.” He pulls my sweater up, exposing my navel, and then he stops, looking me dead in the eyes. “I just have one last thing to ask of you.”

“Okay,” I whisper, my voice quivering, just like my body.

“Let me give you every part of this Jessie, the Seattle Jessie in front of you right now. Because that’s the man you deserve.”

“What about Dallas Jessie?” I reply, my eyes starting to blur. “Seattle Jessie is an amazing hockey player with a posh apartment and a smile that lights me up. But Dallas Jessie is the one my heart remembers.”

I lift my arms as he pulls my sweater over my head, leaving me in my plunging deep-blue bra. His eyes travel to my chest for a second, but then quickly find mine again. He leans in and kisses my collarbone, his lips causing me to pulse all over.

“The Jessie you knew in Dallas is kneeling in front of you right now—he never left, Sweetheart. It’s what’s in Dallas—the other part of my life—that I don’t want to get you tangled up in. Let me protect you from it because there’s nothing there that’s good for you or us. It won’t be this way forever.”

I know there’s no other way. This is not something he’s willing to move on. “Okay.”

He smiles at me, kissing the side of my neck. “Thank you.”

“I never want you to shut me out and leave me on Read again.”