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Date: March 6, 2013, 02:21
For: Judith Flores
Subject: Tell me what you want
Baby, the sincerity and trust between us are essential. The words “Tell me what you want, NOW AND FOREVER” encompass absolutely everything between us.
Think about it.
I love you.
Eric. A tortured asshole.
I smile again.
Of course, I can’t deny Eric has become more open and fun over the past few months. I want to answer, but my fingers won’t cooperate. Another email.
From: Eric Zimmerman
Date: March 6, 2013, 02:30
For: Judith Flores
Subject: Tell me yes
Do you fancy a glass of pink Moët & Chandon? I’m waiting for you in the kitchen.
Eric. A crazy, passionate, and tortured asshole.
I burst out laughing. I adore him.
More than a half hour passes. I read the emails like a hundred times, and a hundred times I smile. He doesn’t send another. My tummy rumbles. I’m hungry. I go to the kitchen, where I find Eric sitting at the table in front of the bottle of pink Moët & Chandon, along with Susto. The dog comes up to me and says hi. I touch his little bony head, and Eric looks at me. He knows I’ve read the emails and no doubt hopes I’ll take the second step.
I walk toward the fridge. As I’m about to open it, I notice my love’s body behind me. Every hair on my body stands on end. I don’t move. I don’t breathe. His strong hands wrap around my waist, and he holds me against his body. I close my eyes and lean back against his chest, and he murmurs into my ear, “I have no wish to be angry with you.”
“Me neither.”
Eric nibbles on my earlobe.
“I could never fall for Amanda’s games. I love you too much to lose you.”
His words are exactly what I needed to hear. I turn around. He cups my face with his hands and kisses my forehead, my eyes, my cheeks, the tip of my nose, my chin, and then he does what I like best. He sucks on my top lip, then the bottom, lightly bites me, and then dives into my mouth. He puts his hand behind my neck as I stand on tiptoes to reach his height. He takes me in his strong arms and doesn’t let me go.
“Now and forever. Don’t forget that, baby.”
I nod and kiss him again. I want him. That’s all there is to it. In each other’s arms, we head to our room. There, my love closes the latch as I take my clothes off, not looking away from him for a second. We make mad, passionate love for hours that night, sealing our commitment the way we do best.
35
We don’t say another word about the wedding. I’m thankful for that. In spite of our love for each other, we are two titans, and when we crash into each other, it scares us both. I know Amanda went back to London because of Eric. The farther away from me she is, the better.
Simona and I continue enjoyingEmerald Madness. I’m totally hooked on the soap opera. When Eric finds out, he makes fun of me. He can’t believe I’m addicted to something like this. Neither can I, but I love it nonetheless.
One afternoon, when Eric gets home, I’m working on my motorbike. When I hear the car, I quickly throw the blue tarp over it and leave the garage. I run to my room, but I wash my hands first. He doesn’t notice a thing. You can’t see where the motorbike is hidden, and even though I breathe a sigh of relief, every day it’s harder to hide the secret from him. My conscience tells me I’m doing something wrong. I’m torturing myself, but I don’t know how to tell him.
On Saturday night, Eric and I go to Nacht’s private party. I’m finally going to get to see this well-known swingers’ bar. Eric introduces me to Heidi and Luigi. Frida and Andrés come join us, and, a little later, Björn arrives with a lady friend. Enjoying myself, I’m having a drink when Dexter shows up.
“Goddess, you’re amazing,” he whispers in my ear when I lean down to greet him. “I’m dying to see you held down between two men.”