Page 84 of Let You Love Me
My breathing turns shallow as I fight my resolve.
Fuck, I’m going to cave.
I can feel it.
If I’m going to stop this, now is the time. Otherwise, I won’t stop until my hands and mouth are everywhere and she’s screaming my name.
I inhale, filling my lungs with a cleansing breath as I remind myself I’m playing the long game. This isn’t about one time or one night. This is about wanting all of Lane, all of the time. This is about making her mine.
And she’s not ready.
I know she’s not.
I grip her thighs, ready to lift her off me and bracing myself for the inevitable rejection I know I’ll see on her face when the monitor on the dock beside us crackles to life.
“Mommy!” Sophie’s voice, small and afraid, cries out in the darkness.
The glazed-over look in Lane’s eyes clears.
She blinks once, twice, then curses under her breath. “Saved by the bell,” she says, then releases her hold on me and swims back to the dock.
Chapter 20
LANE
Istare down atthe bracelet in my hand and my heart clenches. It’s strung together by a pink piece of thick, yellow yarn. Two beads forming the number thirty-seven are flanked by two heart beads on either side.
“Please, Mommy, we have to take it to him,” Sophie whines.
“Soph . . .” I trail off, the words thick in my throat as the unbidden memory of me wrapped in Teagan’s arms and pressed against him in the cool lake hits me out of nowhere.
I climbed that boy like a damn tree, and in those moments, I never wanted anything more than I wanted him.
It would be so easy to blame it on the wine, because, yes, for a lightweight, I had too much, too fast. My head was buzzing, my limbs weightless, but I wasn’t drunk, and wanting him was all my own doing. The wine had nothing to do with the desire coursing through my veins; that was all me. It only made acting on it easier.
My cheeks heat when I replay the evening in my mind.
I’d been so bold with him, so different from the reserved girl I was with Chance back in high school. Then again, I was different then. I had to grow up fast.
What would have happened had Sophie not woken up?
It’s the question I keep asking myself.
And still, I have no answer.
Would Teagan have pushed me away?I could see him teetering close to the edge of his restraint.
Or would we have done something I’d come to regret?
As it is, I’ll have a hard time looking him in the eye when I see him next. I can’t imagine how I would feel if we’d hooked up.
“He needs it. It’s his good luck charm.” Sophie blinks up at me, her expression earnest.
“I know, honey, but he’s getting on a bus soon. Today’s game is away. Even if we wanted him to have it, I’m not sure we’d make it in time.”
“But we have to at leasttry.” Her lower lip quivers and her eyes fill. “Pappy has his handkerchief,” she says, referring to my father’s good luck hanky. “He always has it, and Teagan has nothing.”
“How do you know? Maybe he has—”
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