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“It makes perfect sense, yes.”

“And I’ve been thinking about what you said last time. I want to try it without medication first. See how far I get, and if it doesn’t work…” My voice trailed off.

“You can always tell me, and we can evaluate your options,” he finished my sentence.

“Great, thank you.”

“Of course, that is my job as your doctor.” He gave me a gentle smile.

“Thank you, anyway,” I muttered.

We fixed another appointment in two weeks, and I was off, back to the rink for some more time in the gym.

Back in my bed that night, with my body aching from an extra challenging workout at the gym, I had very little mental energy to think about my brain difference or about that beautiful man in the forest who I missed way more than I should.

I have no time to fall in love.But then again, I always had shit timing.

I turned over in bed and stared at the dark ceiling.

And Jules is worth it all.

Our back to back games and training regimen kept me away from Jules’ forest for so long that my affection for him ached like a physical wound.

“Alright, team.” Jerke blew his whistle. We all skated over to him like obedient dogs. Having played hockey since I was five, I had had more than my fair share of experience with coaches. None of them had ever had their team under control like Jerke without being an asshole. He was a natural born leader and a fantastic player.

“Take the afternoon off. I want you all well rested on the ice at eight tomorrow morning.”

“Yes, Coach,” we replied like school kids.

I checked the clock at the far end of the rink. It was barely one in the afternoon. If I got a move on, I could drive the twenty-five minutes out to the labyrinth and spend the afternoon with Jules.

What if he doesn’t want to see you?

I shut my inner voice down.

Nope.

I knew how my brain worked. The longer I didn’t hear from someone—and how could I when he didn’t have a phone or a computer?—the more I became convinced that they hated me, and that’s why they stayed away.

This is how you lost touch with basically everyone in the past.

No, it was going to be fine. He said he wanted me to come back. Why would that have changed?

Maybe he realised by now what a fake you are? Three imposters in expensive hockey gear.

Oh, fuck off.

“Bye, guys. See you tomorrow.” I shouldered my bag, waved at my teammates and was already on the way to my car.

It was only when I parked my car next to the labyrinth that I remembered I’d wanted to drop by a bakery to grab some coffee and baked goods for us.Shit. But then again, I didn’t want to bring trash into Jules’ life.

I bet he kept his forest clean from any litter. The idea of Jules in a cute outfit pottering around and picking up whatever the wind or the stream brought along amused me. I hated littering, though.

Some teammates had teased me when I had told off some of the teenagers who’d participated in the Blue Kraken training camp last year for littering.The little shits.I grinned at myself, as usual unable to control my facial expressions.

“Who do you think’s going to pick that up, huh? Do you think we throw our shit on the floor in our locker room? Coach would have our heads for that!”

They had scrambled to pick up the protein bar wrappers that they had discarded carelessly on the floor. Guns and Bo had fist bumped me, broad grins on their faces. Nate occasionally quoted me when one of us accidentally dropped something on the floor.