Page 45 of Falling for the Wife

“Choke on my cock,” I roared, possessed with undeniable hedonism.

Thick saliva dribbled out of her mouth. The sublime rush of release as I watched her asphyxiate on my hardness, shortly cutting off her air supply as I pumped into her crevice. The last creamy ropes of my semen jetted onto the back of her throat, never stopping until the very last drop was milked out of me. A harsh grunt rumbled out of my chest as I slid out of her ravaged mouth.

Darting her tongue out, she licked her lips of any traces of my cream.

I gazed down on her, chest heaving, and I was ready to reach out and kiss her senseless when an image of Paige flittered before me. The deathly pale pallor of her corpse as I held onto our dead infant baby enfolded in a pink blanket, her tiny lips bluish purple, lifeless as could be.

As quickly as it flashed before me, it disappeared in the same speedy manner. But the effect of that vivid memory lingered, just it always did before I was set to embark on a risky move. This, however, seldom happened. It wasn’t a common occurrence. I had always thought it an omen, believing my wife and child were out there protecting me somehow. And apparently, Gisele didn’t meet their approval.

“Jared?” Gisele stood on her knees, reaching out to me until I balked at her touch. “Are we…okay?”

No…I doubted we were ever going to be. Not when I was being reeled in by powerful reminders of my vows to Paige. No one would come in between us. Gisele threatened to break what I had with my wife. I was left with no choice but to take a step back. I had kissed her, for fuck’s sake! Paige was supposed to be the last woman whose lips I’d kissed. My promise was now broken. How could I live with the guilt after betraying one of my sacred vows, dishonoring her?

Shame filled me. Repulsion came second.

Gathering her in my arms, I held onto her then pressed my nose into her neck, inhaling her scent before I left a soft kiss on her forehead. “I’m sorry, but I’m leaving for a short while.” Maybe it was high time I moved back to my house in Pacific Heights until I sorted myself out. Adding Rose to the equation would only complicate things.

“When it comes to you, I’m always on the losing end…When will I ever learn?” she mumbled to herself, shivering in my arms.

Hardening my heart, I repeated how sorry I was, but she wasn’t having it.

“I’m not going to wait for you, you know.” She sniffed, her beautiful face twisted in unbound pain. “I’m not going pine until you’ve gotten bored with Rose and come back to me so you can indulge having a little thrill messing around with me. I won’t let you treat me that way. If you choose to leave and temporarily move in with her, I won’t ever welcome you back in my bed again, Jared. Not next month. Not next year or in five years’ time. If you leave, you leave it for good.” Tilting her stubborn chin, chilling gray eyes bore into my blue ones.

An ultimatum. She was throwing an ultimatum…because she didn’t want to let me go. I didn’t deserve her. Maybe Wyatt Rinaldi would be perfect for her. Admitting it didn’t sit well with me, but I was left with no choice. The sacrifice was too great if I pursued this route with Gisele. The woman had the capacity to break down my barriers. She had gotten me to kiss her after ten years of keeping my promise to Paige. If Gisele accomplished such a feat in less than a month, how long would it take for her to capture my heart? I didn’t want to know. Leaving her to secure my lucidity was far more important than indulging in erotic highs.

“Forgive me, but my mind’s made up.” My eyes never left her beautiful ones, feeling wounded all of a sudden, as though I had lost something significant with her. I probably did. I wouldn’t know.

Disentangling from my arms, Gisele proudly gathered her robe. She didn’t function in haste. She took her time sliding her arms into the silk gown before she tied it around her body.

“Give my kind regards to Rose.” She granted me one icy look before walking away, out of the walk-in closet and out the door of the bedroom.

I didn’t realize I was holding my breath until I heard the loud thud of the door being shut.

Hollowness pitted in my stomach, but I ignored the plaguing feeling. Letting her go was for the best. She was too young, too everything. And if I was being truly honest with myself, Gisele petrified me since controlling my urges whenever she was around seemed futile.

My fate was sealed, a fate that didn’t include her.

CHAPTER16

Jared

“Mister St. James?”Audrey, my personal assistant, strode in with her electronic calendar as she gave me a pointed look. Her cat-like eyeglasses made it much more severe. “I’m here to remind you it’s Peter’s daughter’s nineteenth birthday tomorrow. Her father’s arranged flowers for all special occasions, but I’m also wondering if you want me to send an arrangement addressed from you since you’re her guardian, after all?”

Tomorrow was her birthday. “Yes, that’d be lovely. Thanks for reminding me, Audrey.” How had this escaped my mind? I supposed I wasn’t as keen as I had thought I was. Setting my pen down, I glanced towards the determined woman situated across from me, brows furrowing as her fingertips busied with tapping nonstop on the screen. “Do you think I should give a present as well?”

Without looking up, she shrugged. “She’s a teenager. Teenagers love presents.”

Teenager. Well, there you go. A bloody fucking teenager! I cringed each time the wordteenagercrossed my mind. If there were any doubts, this surely cleared whatever qualms I’d had for the past month. Setting her free was the right and only choice.

“Do you have any recommendations?”

“Jewelry?A car maybe?A trip somewhere? I imagine she has everything, so it’s tricky. You have to think outside the box.”

A car, but I had no idea what she’d like. What if she preferred her Ranger Rover, anyway, so it’d be wasting a present? More importantly, what made me think she’d even welcome anything from me? We parted on not so friendly terms.

After dismissing Audrey, I sat back and pondered about the woman who hounded my thoughts consistently. Work had been a great distraction, but coming home to an empty house without Gisele’s body to warm me at night had been rather lonely for me. My body had gotten so used to having her close to me that sleep was a rarity these days. I craved her scent, her warmth, even though I knew it was wrong to do so. It was an unending battle, so on the nights that tempted me to drive to Peter’s home, seek her out, and ask for forgiveness, I’d drown myself in liquor until it knocked me out of consciousness.

Rose and I had been in constant communication. Although, I hadn’t seen her since I had moved back into my old home. I had every intention of seeing her again. For me to achieve that, I had to get Gisele out of my system first.