Page 61

“I’d like to make a toast,” Todd said and stood. “First of all, to Evie for agreeing to marry me. I would have been in sad shape if she’d said no.” He leaned down and kissed her, and everybody whooped and clapped.
“Second, I’d like to thank my parents and Evie’s parents for hosting such a beautiful wedding celebration. It was perfect in every way. Thank you for organizing and for, well, paying.” Everyone laughed.
“Third, I’d like to thank my brother James for being my best man, and for taking time out of his busy schedule to actually go on vacation for once. I have a feeling I should really be thanking his girlfriend, Audrey, since James has never been this relaxed in his life. So cheers to James and Audrey. And cheers to all of you for joining us on this happy occasion. To the hair of the dog!” Todd said and knocked back his shot.
“The hair of the dog.” Everyone clinked glasses and drank their tequila, me included. But the shot didn’t make me feel any better. I was happy for Todd and Evie—I swear to God I was—but hearing about their happiness, happy occasion, fabulous vacation with their parents and friends, and legitimate happily-ever-after was sort of making me unhappy. It was sort of making me want to puke.
I leaned over to Audrey, who I hadn’t had a chance to talk to all day. “Can we take a break?” I asked.
“Sure,” she said.
I grabbed her hand, and we walked from the ocean-side restaurant to the central part of the resort. “I just need a little space,” I said, looking back at the table. Cole was talking to Todd and James.
“Is everything okay?” Audrey asked.
I could feel the hurt bubbling up inside me. I’d kept it in all day, but there was no avoiding it now. I shook my head. “No. No, it is not.”
We found a private bathroom with a lounge area; we went inside and locked the door. I started pacing, unsure what to say. My thoughts and feelings were all jumbled up, making me emotional. I didn’t like feeling that way. I wanted that piece of me that was always in control to come back, save me from myself, and make the threatening tears take a hike and never return.
“What’s wrong?” Audrey asked.
“It’s Cole,” I said. “He told me he doesn’t want me to go back to work after this. He said he wants me to be exclusive.”
All of a sudden, the tears were winning. I headed for the vanity and checked my makeup, ensuring my mascara stayed intact.
“Is that a bad thing?” she asked. “You don’t want to be exclusive?”
“It’s not that,” I said. I gritted my teeth and then examined them for lipstick. “It’s that he said he’d buy me an apartment, buy me whatever kind of car I wanted, blah blah blah.”
“Oh. Huh.” Audrey sounded confused. “And that’s bad?”
“Yeah, it’s bad, Dre,” I said. “Because that’s not what I want!”
Audrey was watching me carefully. “Whatdoyou want?”
“More.” I rolled my eyes at myself in the mirror. “Jesus, you’d think I was some kind of amateur. I shoulda never come on this trip.”
Audrey came closer and rubbed my arm. “It’s okay, Jenny. But did you tell him how you felt?”
I snorted. “No fucking way. He told me he didn’t want me to go back to hooking after this trip. So I told him to make me an offer I couldn’t refuse, you know? And he made me an offer I couldn’t refuse. It was just the wrong one.”
“I think you should talk to him,” she said. “Just like you told me to talk to James. Remember? When you told me to be brave?”
“I’m not you, Dre. It’s not possible to clean this up,” I said, motioning to myself, “put it into a Volvo, and pretend it knows how to play tennis. Do you understand?”
Audrey nodded while I got back to carefully blotting my eyes. “I don’t know if Cole cares about Volvos and tennis, Jenny,” she said. “But I’m pretty sure he cares about you.”
“Do not try to turn my airplane pep talk around on me,” I said. Now I felt like I might really start bawling. “This is totally different.”
“If you say so,” Audrey said. She didn’t sound like she meant it. “But you had some pretty good advice. I’m just saying.”
I blew out a deep breath. “What about you and James?” I asked, changing the subject. “You looked a lot happier in the pool earlier. Are you all better?”
She nodded. “He asked me to move to California with him.”
“I knew it!” I cried. “I knew it! I could tell just by looking at him. You’re gonna live happily ever after.”
“I don’t know about that,” she said.