Page 129

“I swear.” Audrey held up her pinkie. “I’m so sorry, Jenny. How was he blackmailing you? Why didn’t you just tell Cole what was going on?”
“Because I couldn’t,” I said immediately. “Cole’s father told me if I talked, I’d only make it worse.”
“I can’t believe it,” Audrey said.
“I can.” I snorted. “This isn’t exactly my first rodeo, Dre. Where I’m coming from, blackmail and threats are like a dime a dozen, you know? So when Cole’s father first threatened me, that was rough. But I thought I had it handled.”
“What did he threaten you with?” Audrey asked.
“To bring back some stuff from my past. Some bad stuff.” I shook my head. “I was so ashamed I agreed to do what he wanted, just to tell him stuff about Cole’s conversations. But then he asked me to send messages from Cole’s phone, and I said no.”
I looked up and met her eyes. “But then he threatened to hurt Cole. And he threatened to hurt him if I told anybody what was going on. So I did it. I got on his phone last night and posed as Cole. I offered some guy from the state a bribe so his father’s deal could go through.”
“Jenny.” Audrey’s shoulders slumped. “I wish you would have told us. We could have helped you.”
I blew my nose again. “You say that, and I know you mean it. But I also know that Cole’s father meant it—hemeanthe would do something bad to Cole. So what’s going to happen now, huh? What’s going to happen now that Cole knows?”
I started crying again. “I don’t care anymore about what his father will do to me. As far as I see it, my life is over. I got nothing left.”
“Jenny!” Audrey sprang up and wrapped her arms around me, pulling me in for a tight embrace. “Please don’t talk like that! You’re my best friend, and I love you. Cole loves you.”
“No, he doesn’t. Not anymore.” I started crying harder, and I pulled away. “Don’t let me get snot in your nice, clean hair.”
“I don’t care about my hair.” Audrey hugged me tighter. “But I do care aboutyou. And I know that Cole loves you, and if he’s a good guy like I think he is, he’ll understand what you did. He’ll forgive you.”
“No, he won’t.” I roughly wiped my eyes. “He said this morning that he never should have trusted me, and he was right. I lied to him. And I hid things from him. You don’t do that when you love a person.”
“You do if you’re trying to protect them,” Audrey said gently.
I pulled back and blew my nose again. “Back when this first started, I was only protecting myself. I didn’t want Cole to know the truth about me.”
“Jenny, we’ve all done things we aren’t proud of.”
“Nah, it’s worse than just hooking.” I shook my head. “I did some bad shit when I was younger, Dre. Real bad. Shit I didn’t want anyone to ever find out about.”
Audrey sighed. “You’re a good person, Jenny. Even if you did something bad, I’m sure it was for a good reason.”
“Oh, it was, sure.” I felt like I might throw up.
The room got quiet for a moment. The air felt heavy.
Never had I ever told anyone my secret.
“You can tell me, you know,” Audrey said gently. “You can tell me anything.”
I took a deep breath. “You know what?”
“What?”
“I want to, and I will tell you the truth,” I said. But I need to tell Cole first. Do you understand that?”
Audrey nodded, eyes wide. “I do. I would be the same way with James. I’m your best friend, but he’s your… person.”
I nodded. “He’s my person.”
And even if he never wanted to see me again and no longer wanted to be mine, I owed him the truth.
I wiped my face again. “Thanks, Audrey. It’s nice to have a friend. To have someone to talk to—someone who understands. I never had that before, you know?”