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“I really shouldn’t tell you all my secrets.”

“What good is a secret if you don’t have someone to share it with?”

“That’s true. When’s the last time you… uh… topped?”

I laughed so hard that I had to catch my breath. “You don’t remember Daniel? He’s the guy who told me all night how badly he wanted inside me, and when I got him home, his legs went right up in the air.”

“Oh, yeah. That was at Momma’s Place, right? You called me as soon as he left.”

“After that, I knew my place. I was so bored. I’m strictly a vers bottom who chooses to forget all about being a vers. It makes life easier.”

“That’s why we fit so well, huh?” He rolled over and used my thigh for a pillow. I stroked his short buzzcut. It felt like velvet.

“I mean, we only tried that one time and…”

“We were very, very drunk,” he groaned.

“I think it fit.” I smiled at the memory I had replayed way too many times in my head over the last few months.

“God, that was… what? Fifteen years ago, right?”

“Or about eighty bad dates ago. Either way will work.”

“You were mortified when we woke up.”

“You were pretty freaked out, too. You couldn’t even look at me.” I took my hands off his hair.

“I wonder what would have…” He pushed himself up and looked at me. “If we hadn’t been so drunk.”

“We would have never had the courage, probably.”

“We are so mature. Look at us!” He slapped my thigh.

“Well, maturity is marching right across my face.”

“Get up, lazy.” He jumped off the bed.

“So… You’re really going to make me chop things?”

“Hopefully not your fingers.”

“I have mediocre knife skills and a fear of blood. Let’s do it.” I reached out, and Ryder pulled me from the bed with his strong arms. I noticed the way his biceps bulged.

“Maybe I’ll chop everything.” He threw his arm around me and led me to the door.

“Good. Then I can sip wine and watch how amazing you are. I mean, I could make the salad.”

“That requires knife skills.” He laughed deeply.

“Oh, yeah. I meant I could eat the salad.”

“What am I going to do with you?”

I swallowed the knot in my stomach. And before I could make an even bigger fool of myself, I patted him on the shoulder and ran downstairs. There were too many ways to answer his question, and none of them were safe.

I couldn’t. I couldn’t afford to lose him. He was all that I had.

ChapterThree