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His dick rests at my entrance, and then out of nowhere, my body tenses. All of a sudden, I’m worried about what will happen when he drives himself inside me for the first time.
Will I have a flashback? A panic attack?
Oh God, I can’t do that to him.
I can’t let him think that I can’t do this because of him.
“Low, what’s wrong?” he calls, pulling his hips away from me, giving me room.
“I’m worried doing it likethis? this position ? will bring back bad memories or a flashback,” I answer honestly, hating the fact my admission causes him pain, his jaw tensing.
Tears pool in my eyes. I feel like a failure. But I watch in amazement as his eyes soften and he leans in to kiss the tip of my nose.
“I have an idea. Do you trust me?” he asks, his voice softer.
“With my life,” I answer immediately, my voice not once wavering. “Hey,” I squeal, as he lifts me up in the air, positioning me over his body.
“Nowyou’rein control.Youcontrol how deep you go; how slow you go. And if you ever need to stop, all you have to do is lift yourself off me. I’ll never stop you,” he tells me gently.
“I really do love you,” I declare, feeling a few tears escape.
“I love you too,” he returns, his eyes softening, his love for me reflecting back at me.
Before he can talk me out of this, or change his own mind, I take his dick in my hand, lifting myself over him. I ease his hardness inside me, moaning and arching as he stretches me full, filling me.
“Fuck, you’re so tight,” Cole grunts, holding my hips to slow me down. I want more of him, every delicious inch filling me. I slam myself down on him, hard, his dick hitting the right spot, causing me to call out his name in a high-pitched scream.
“That feels so good,” I moan, moving back up, then slamming back down on him, feeling my body burn with each stroke.
“Oh, fuck!” Cole hisses, his hard body tightening even more beneath me. I trace the line of his abs, using them to keep balance as I keep up my steady pace.
It’s never felt this good before, ever. This… This is something else. I can feel my core tightening, sharp tingles causing me to move my body faster.
My body weakens the closer I get, so Cole takes over. Taking my hips in his large hands, he lifts me effortlessly up and down his hard length, slamming himself inside me.
I scream, my voice hoarse as I come, my whole core tightening with my release. Cole follows a few seconds later, his bellow echoing around the room, his hardness pulsing inside of me.
I whimper, still feeling overly sensitive.
I fall limply onto his chest, my breathing out of control, my chest panting as sweat falls down the middle of my back.
Cole’s fingers run up and down my spine, and the soft touch causes a sob to break free, tears bursting from my eyes. I feel everything, all of it overwhelming me to the point I break, letting the tears run free.
“Hey, Low, what’s wrong?” Cole asks, panicked. “Did I hurt you?” he asks, swallowing the words like they cause a bitter taste in his mouth.
“I… He didn’t break me,” I sob, overwhelmed with everything I’m feeling.
Cole loved me. He didn’t take advantage of me. We got through it, together. I didn’t have a panic attack or freak out on him.
Logan didn’t break me!
He didn’t ruin me.
He didn’t destroy me.
He didn’t win.
He doesn’t get to ruin my future or my love life. I dictate when, where and how I have sex, not him. He can’t take that away from me. He can never take anything away from me ever again.