Page 71 of Carnal Games

If she really did her research, me being a heartless bastard shouldn’t come as a shock. Let her think I am one, just like the world does. Perhaps then she’ll learn to stay away.

“I suggest that you start locking the doors, Miss Mannan.”

I don’t wait for her reaction and turn around to leave.

Iris

I stare at his retreating back, fighting back my tears after he stomps on my heart. Without even realizing it, which is the truly saddest part.

The exhilarating rush I felt seeing him first thing in the morning dwindles into ashes. It shames me to admit that I left the door wide open on purpose. Though the lost remote wasn’t a lie.

My intention for hoping he shows up to my apartment wasn’t for my secret mission either. It was simply to see if he felt the pull.

Now, I’m wishing I hadn’t done it.

Because deeper than the delight is the slicing pain in my chest at hearing him admit he brings women over to his place.

Just because he’s a recluse, doesn’t mean he’s a virgin and waiting for the one.

Nope. That’s just silly ole me.

And no, it’s not because I’ve been saving myself for Kian. I mean, not entirely. It’s just, he came into my life around the time I was slowly prepping myself into wanting it. In high school, I wasn’t in a rush to lose my virginity to any boy who came along or the two guys I dated. My studies had always been my focus. I was a shy kid. The list goes on.

Majorly, those were stupid boys who didn’t know the first thing about bringing a woman pleasure. Fumbling in the dark with a virgin boy didn’t turn me on.

Losing your virginity is scary enough as it is. It hurts no matter what. So, I certainly didn’t want to do it with a teenager who was as clueless as me. I’m a nervous wreck when it comes to most things. Sex with someone my own age would’ve scared me shitless.

My preferences were different from the beginning.

I desired someone who knew what he was doing. Someone experienced. One who could make my blood run hotter with a single glance. Someone who made me desperate, writhing, and overcome with lust that all that mattered was having him inside me.

So, hell if I was going to lose my virginity on anything less than my own terms.

Then I saw Kian and it’s like God listened to my wishes.

Too bad, I didn’t realize it would come with a drawback.

The green-eyed monster.

I’d prefer Kian to be a virgin. Because the image of him with other women is making me wanna go on a rampage. Locate the girls he slept with and mark my territory by telling them he’s mine.

Sighing, I first lock the door before dragging myself to the bathroom. The whole time I’m showering, my mind spirals with questions I have no business thinking.

Does Kian shower with them? Does he cook them breakfast in the mornings? Is he a one-night stand or a dating type of guy? How often does he invite women? What about at the club? Is that what he was busy doing last night? Hooking up?

Oh, I knew Zain was lying. Pretty sure Kian sent him to get rid of me.

The dirty fivesome flashes across my mind and I have a disturbing image of Kian participating in a similar scene.

Ugh!! This is torture.

Not even the spacious and opulent bathroom with multiple showerheads is uplifting my mood or shutting off my brain.

My day is officially ruined.

Stepping out from under the spray, I turn it off before grabbing a towel off of the rack and pat myself dry. Entering the bedroom, I stroll to the walk-in closet with a cream rug. In the corner sits my suitcase with my clothes still thrown inside.

I was too tired to unpack my mere belongings. They can all fit in one column. Besides my clothes, I brought my small collection of heels, which I arranged last night.