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My skin tingles with awareness, but knowing that she’s waiting for me to go, I take it as my cue.
Starting the engine, I put my car in to reverse and take off, leaving my best friend and my heart behind.
37
EFFIE
Kieran: Just got home. Are you okay?
Kieran: Effie?
Kieran: Please just let me know that you’re okay.
Kieran: Please, Effie. I’m worried about you.
Iblow out a ragged breath as I wipe my tears from my cheeks.
I haven’t stopped crying since he walked out of the house.
For a moment there, I thought he was going to refuse.
There was a part of me that wanted him to. That fickle romantic part wanted him to pull me into his arms, kiss the top of my head, and tell me that he was never going to leave me.
But the sensible side of me knew that it was wrong.
Reading that article, all the awful comments that people had left at the bottom...it broke the final part of me that I was clinging to for dear life.
I’m going to be the most hated woman in Chicago. As far as they’re concerned, I played their favorite player for nothing but my own gain.
It’s so far from the truth, it’s laughable. But there isn’t much I can do about it now.
If the notifications that have been piling up on my cell are anything to go by, the story is everywhere.
I’ve ignored every single message but the ones I’m staring at through watery eyes.
It’s been six hours since he left. I’d been waiting for the message to come through for over an hour, getting myself worked up with a million and one what-ifs.
Either he forgot, and the moment he got back to Chicago, he pushed me out of his mind, or he had a crash and he was stuck inside a wreck in the middle of nowhere and no one knows.
Of course, there was also the most sensible option, which was that he was just stuck in traffic somewhere.
When the message finally came through, my sobs returned with a vengeance.
He left.
He really listened to what I was saying and went home.
Pulling the covers up higher, I press my face into the pillow he slept on and breathe in his scent.
This isn’t going to help me get over everything that’s happened and let him go, but I figure that I’m allowed to wallow today at least.
Tomorrow, I’m going to get my shit together.
I’m going to get up early. I’m going to clean the house—clean house, clean mind—and then I’m going to reassess my life.
I hadn’t considered not returning to Chicago until Kieran questioned whether I would. Now I’m wondering if it’s really what I want.
Sure, my job, my apartment, and my life are there…but they don’t have to be.