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Do you know what she means by that?

I do because my happiness goes with it.

CHAPTER14

Cheater, Cheater

JACE

Chicken dinner.

She’stired of the situation. I’m tired of believing I can give her what she wants. She knew. She knew what line she was crossing when she stepped foot in Amarillo. The agony of that truth eats at me.

Why?

She knows why. And the truth, I don’t want to share. Her place is with me.

“You get out of this truck, Abbi, and I’m done. Don’t call me. Don’t text me. We’re over. For good this time.”

Spoiler alert: she got out of my fucking Jeep. But you know that already, didn’t you?

I think about her with him and the jealousy boils over. I laid witness to the parts of her that belong to me. I saw the fear in her eyes and I know, he willneverhave her entirely.

Now look at me, day drinking in the living room of my parents’ home, thinking of stripping naked and running around in the snow to see if it takes away the pain. At least if I’m frost bitten my heart won’t hurt so goddamn bad.

She can wound me.

She can scar me.

She can do whatever she wants to me.

Why? Because she owns me.

The thing is, this girl, the one I’m obsessed with, I always fall back into a situation I said I wouldn’t do again. Why? Because it’s Abigale Lockett and I can’t say no. She leaves me helpless.

Do I want her to leave him? Yes.

Do I want her to choose me this time? No. Not really.

Okay, before you go all fucking crazy on me, there’s a reason for it.

I don’t know what that is yet, but it’s there in the back of my mind. A scream that says you’re not good enough for her. She deserves everything you can’t give her.

Like it or not, I’m not a heart surgeon, and the last time I checked, ranch mechanics are pretty low on the list of high-paying jobs.

Blowing out a breath, I stare at the white ceiling above me and bring my beer to my lips. This house my parents live in, I was born and raised here. It’s small, three bedrooms, modest, but exactly what they needed. They live within their means, work hard for everything they have, and if you were to tell my dad he wasn’t good enough for someone, he’d laugh in your fucking face. He runs an excavator company, and though I could work for him, I didn’t want to answer to my old man. So I work for Barron and the rest of my buddies. Besides, working for family sucks. Ask Rhett. He was roped into it against his will.

I take a drink, sigh again, and the front door opens.

“Where in the fuck have you been?” is asked, followed by the door being kicked shut as Josie appears with two bags of groceries in her hands.

I swallow hard and I don’t offer to help her carry them in, nor do I care what’s in them. Unless it’s a loaded gun. I’m kidding. Maybe? But I focus on the question she asked. Where have I been? By the look on Josie’s face, she knows, so this particular question is more than likely meant to piss me off or coax me into a conversation she wants to have. “Around.”

She sets the bags on the counter, leaves them there and pulls out a beer from the fridge and sits next to me. “You missed Christmas.”

My eyes drift to the tree still up and my insistent desire to burn it to the ground. I’m surprised I haven’t. I’ve flicked the button on the lighter in my other hand twice now. The only thing stopping me is my mom. She’d kill me. But maybe that wouldn’t be so bad, would it?

I glance over at Josie and then the tree. “No, it happened. I didn’t miss anything.”