Page 85 of Zero Divergence
Royce was still laughing at the boys’ antics when Candi and Bailey came inside to see if he needed help.
“I love seeing that sappy smile on your face, Ro,” Candi said.
“I love wearing it,” he replied truthfully. “I love seeing a smile return to your face too.”
“We’re healing,” she said. “Each day is a little easier than the one before.” Candi reached inside her purse and pulled out an envelope. Crossing the room, she extended it to him.
Royce opened the envelope. There was a check inside for the amount he’d given her when the creditors were breathing down her neck. He pushed the envelope back at her. “I told you it wasn’t a loan, Candi.”
“I don’t need it now that I’m receiving Marcus’s benefits. I’ve decided to take your suggestion and sell the house to buy something smaller and more affordable. I wanted to hold on to the house for the wrong reasons, and it’s time to let it go. Let the hurt go. You and I will find a different way to keep Marcus’s memory alive for the kids.”
Royce nodded because they would. Now came the hard part. “Candi, there’s something I want to talk to you about, but I don’t want to upset you.”
She offered him a sad smile. “I can probably guess.”
“Come with me a minute,” he said, tipping his head to the opposite side of the house. “I don’t want the boys to walk in and overhear us talking.”
Royce led Candi to the study and asked her to make herself comfortable while he retrieved a few things from the bedroom. Her eyes immediately went to Marcus’s tattered hat when he walked into the room.
“Oh my gosh!” she said, covering her mouth for a few seconds. “I didn’t think I’d ever see that ratty hat again.”
Royce took a deep breath and sat beside her. He set the hat and phone on the coffee table and showed her the tape player and cassette box with Marcus’s name.
Candi closed her eyes and raised her hand to cover her trembling lips. Then she lowered her hand, blew out a shaky breath, and opened her eyes. Royce hated the pained expression on her face. “Is that what I think it is?” Candi asked weakly.
Royce had refused to watch news coverage for several days after the fire, but Rigby had told him the press had gotten wind of the recorded confessions. The identities of the victims never became public and Rigby destroyed all the tapes, except Marcus’s, to keep it that way. Candi had never asked him if Father David recorded their sessions, but it had to be on her mind.
“Yeah,” Royce said.
Candi tugged at the collar of her T-shirt. “I thought they were all destroyed.” Sensing her mother’s distress, Bailey began to fuss. “It’s okay, baby girl,” she said softly, but Royce wasn’t sure if she was trying to convince herself or her daughter.
“All of them were destroyed except this one,” Royce replied.
Candi nodded. “Did you listen to it?”
“Yes, I did. I needed answers. I needed to understand why—” His voice broke, and Royce cleared his throat.
“You know about the affair,” she whispered brokenly.
“I found out when I started probing around to see if IA had a legitimate case against Marcus. I was stunned.”
“I didn’t ever want you to find out,” she said. “I knew there was a chance you’d uncover something pretty awful if IA was investigating Marcus, but I knew you’d take the cheating news worse. You looked up to him, and I didn’t want to take that away from you. It turns out I did anyway.”
Royce covered her hand. “Don’t blame yourself. None of what happened is your fault.”
Candi rotated her wrist and laced their fingers together. “I wish that were true. Marcus wasn’t the only one with secrets. I’ve kept something from you, too, because I didn’t want you to hate me.”
Royce shook his head. “It could never happen.”
“I had asked Marcus for a divorce that weekend. I waited until I was out of town, then told him over the phone I was leaving him. I thought it was what he wanted, Royce. He’d been seeing Crystal off and on for three years.” Royce was stunned at the casual way she’d said the other woman’s name. “Marcus would break up with her every few months and recommit himself to our marriage, but it never lasted long. At first, I hated her. Then I started hating myself for putting up with Marcus’s infidelity and for not being able to let him go. Why the hell would I want to cling to a man who thought so little of me? I would’ve given up more than Marcus though. I would’ve lost you and Holly in the divorce.”
Royce shook his head emphatically. “No way.”
Candi smiled sadly. “It’s easy for you to say that now, but I’ve seen how this goes. Everyone chooses a side. You and Holly belonged to Marcus long before I came around.”
Royce wanted to keep denying it, but he knew there was truth in her words. Instead, he released her hand so he could put his arm around her. “How did Marcus take it when you said you wanted to get a divorce?”
“Honestly, he sounded relieved. Maybe resigned is a better word. He didn’t express excitement or rush me off the phone so he could hurry up and tell Crystal the good news. We had a calm conversation about the united front we would make for the kids. He said he loved me and I was the best thing to ever happen to him. I had this sudden thought that I was making a huge mistake, then realized he didn’t mean he wasinlove with me. And you know what? It was okay because I wasn’t in love with him either. Before we hung up, Marcus apologized for failing me, and he promised I would meet a more deserving man someday.” Candi turned her head into Royce’s shoulder and cried for a few moments before lifting a tear-streaked face up to look at him. “I was petty and didn’t dispute what he said, but I swear to you, Ro. I had no idea he was going to hurt himself.”