Page 72 of Zero Divergence
“How did things evolve from looking to acting on your thoughts?”
“Todd’s idiot best friend made a big deal out of announcing we each got a private dance in one of the bedrooms in the finished basement,” Marcus said. “Can you believe this schmuck brought strippers into his home and offered up a bedroom for thedances?” Royce imagined Marcus using air quotes there, even though he would’ve been in a booth with no one to see him. “I’m sure his wife knew nothing about it. The nerve of—”
Father David softly hummed, ending Marcus’s tirade. “We’re not here to talk about Todd’s behavior, or his best friend’s, or anyone else who attended the party. I want to hear aboutyoursins.”
“You’re right,” Marcus said contritely. “I flat-out refused the private dance when they announced it was my turn. As I expected, the guys jeered and called me a pu—Um, names. It was humiliating. The dancers were laughing and chiding me too.”
“Even the one who’d caught your eye?” Father David asked.
“Not her,” Marcus said emphatically. “She looked sympathetic, but she was the one who eventually talked me into going into the private room.”
“How?”
Yeah, how?
“She crossed the room to where I sat on the couch, leaned over, and pressed her lips to my ear, whispering, ‘You can trust me. I promise to be a good girl and keep my hands to myself.’ She straightened back up and looked at me curiously when I didn’t immediately stand up and follow her. Then she saw my problem.”
“You were aroused,” Father David said, making Royce cringe.
“Very,” Marcus admitted reluctantly. “I realized there was no way I was getting out of going into the room. There was no way in hell I was the only one sporting wood, so I got up and followed her to the bedroom.” He took a shaky breath and paused a few minutes before continuing. “She kept her word and didn’t dance for me. We just talked. She told me her name was Crystal, she was new in town, and had recently started working at The Alley Cat. She did not attempt to touch me or seduce me. If I’m honest, she looked relieved that she didn’t have to dance for me. I told her about my job and my kids. Then she nodded to the wedding ring on my hand and said my wife was a lucky woman. She’d found a rare man with honor, and it was no surprise he belonged to someone else.” Marcus snorted derisively. “It didn’t take Crystal long to realize I had no honor.”
“How?” Father David asked.
“When our time was up, she smiled sweetly and moved to kiss my cheek. I don’t know what made me do it, Father, but I turned my head, so her kiss landed on my mouth instead.” Marcus groaned, and Royce imagined him running both hands through his hair as he’d been prone to do when he was frustrated. “A good man worthy of the praise she’d heaped on him would’ve at least stepped back and apologized, but I deepened the kiss when she parted her lips in surprise. My senses just went haywire, overloading and short-circuiting my brain. Candi and I have been working different shifts for a few years, which didn’t allow much time for us to be intimate. We were on a particularly long dry spell at the time. Crystal wrapped her arms around me, pressed her body against my chest, and I was done for.”
“Did you have sex with her?” Father David asked when Marcus was silent for too long.
“No, but only because Todd’s buddy banged on the door and loudly announced our time was up. He said I could finish myself off in the powder room like the rest of them if I hadn’t already jizzed in my pants. Vile jerk. The truth is, if he hadn’t knocked when he did, I would’ve had sex with her. That’s how strong the desire was. I borrowed the powder room as the asshole suggested instead.”
Father David cleared his throat.
“Sorry, Father.”
“Tell me how you went from almost breaking your vows to breaking them,” Father David said calmly. The man’s soothing voice was making Royce sleepy again, but he needed to finish the recording.
“Isn’t it obvious, Father?”
“Not to me,” the clergy replied.
“I knew where she worked, and I knew her name was Crystal. I convinced myself for a month or six weeks what I had experienced was nothing more than being horny after a long dry spell. I tried harder to be a better husband and father. Candi and I carved out more couple time for ourselves. No matter how hard we tried, I couldn’t ignore how far we’d grown apart. I started to wonder if we married one another because it was what our families expected. We’d met in high school and dated through college, so marriage was the next logical step. Where does logic fit in with love?” Marcus asked.
“Perhaps a topic for another day?” Father David asked.
“Yeah,” Marcus chuckled wryly. “It’s sure easier to dissect other issues than face the one choking me.”
“Very true,” Father David agreed. “I take it you went to the club and sought out Crystal?”
Marcus’s recorded sobs shredded Royce’s heart. Sensing his distress, Bones looked up at him. Royce reached down and buried his fingers in the cat’s thick, soft fur, petting him until the urge to howl and throw the recorder passed.
“Yes,” Marcus finally said. “At first, we just talked. I paid hundreds of dollars just to have her undivided attention. She listened to me and expressed interest in my career, my kids, and me. She looked at me like I was someone important. Neither of us could deny our attraction or resist the temptation of being alone in the private dance rooms. I hate myself for it, Father. I’m weak and unworthy.” Those weren’t the words and sounds of an unrepentant man. They were the anguished cries of someone who’d broken vows that had meant the world to him at one time. In the process of shattering the trust Candi had placed in him, Marcus had broken his own heart and lost faith in himself.
“You know what you must do, son. You must tell your wife, ask her for forgiveness, and seek counseling to resolve the issues in your marriage. You must do it for your wife and your children.”
“Yes,” Marcus said. “I want to fix this. Things aren’t right between Candi and me, but I want them to be. I want to love her like I used to and be the man she trusts me to be. I want to be the type of father Marc and Daniel deserve, and not the guy who cheats on their mother.”
Royce was outraged Marcus hadn’t mentioned Bailey until he realized she hadn’t even been conceived at this time if Amber had been truthful about when their affair had begun. Father David hadn’t dated Marcus’s recordings, so he had to go with his gut, which told him Amber hadn’t lied.
“The devil has tempted you away from your duties, but you can cast him out, son. When your body betrays your spirit and soul with sinful urges, you must pray harder. Let me guide you.” Father David began to pray, but Royce’s spinning brain tuned him out.