Page 9

Annalise

I have no purpose.

Because I am human, I cannot be a mother to my own son. And because I am the king’s prized possession, I cannot be a slave within Felix’s estate. I am without purpose, floating in a constant state of limbo. My only reprieve is when I can see Ciel, and even that is for a few hours a day before they take him from me to teach him things I fundamentally cannot.

I silently watch Joan as she steps into the laundry area, pulling some of the linens from where they’ve been hung to dry. Joan is a quiet beast. We were introduced the same day Cyrus left. She is my personal attendant. She rarely speaks to me, only becoming vocal when reprimanding me for crying about Ciel. But unlike the beasts when I was a slave, Joan has never let a complaint leave her lips.

It reaffirms my belief that Cyrus planted her specifically to watch me.

My boredom finally gets the better of me, and I stand, making my way to where she has begun to fold. Without saying a word, I reach for the linens, only to have them ripped out of my hands. Joan’s gaze is narrowed as she studies me.

“What do you think you’re doing?” she snaps.

“I was just trying to help,” I say softly.

Instead of responding, Joan scoffs, tossing the linens back into the basket as she continues to fold.

“I was a slave once to the king. I’ve done this kind of work before,” I say defensively.

Joan keeps her eyes trained on what she’s doing as she speaks.

“I know all about your past with the king. It is irrelevant. You are not to be seen doing servant’s work,” she says.

I blink in confusion, my irritation growing as I step closer to her.

“And why is—“

“What do you think beasts would say if word got out that the mother of the heir to the throne was doing servant work?” I tense as the familiar sound of Felix’s voice washes over the small courtyard. Joan and I both bow to him as he approaches, but Joan is the one to greet him verbally.

“General,” she murmurs.

I keep my eyes trained on the ground as Felix stands over us, his presence one that rivals Cyrus, especially since he holds no emotion other than hatred for me.

“Joan, don’t you have other duties to tend to?” he asks, breaking the silence.

Joan immediately takes the hint, bowing once more as she pulls the remaining linens into her basket, scurrying from the courtyard. Felix still doesn’t speak, but I keep my eyes down, the rules of beast society scorched into my skull.

“Look at me,” he grounds out.

Just being in the same vicinity as me seems to be a task for him. I raise my gaze, keeping my hands clasped in front of me as Felix studies me. His dark gaze roams over my features, dipping slightly to observe the elegant gown chosen for me to wear today.

“Cyrus always did obsess over your ability to pass as noble. He was always so fascinated by how intensely your beauty rivals a beast’s,” he laughs.

“But looking and being are two different things, as you obviously have no inclination of just how serious what you were about to do is,” he says, stepping around me.

“When you are a noble, your upbringing is crucial. You are never to do the work of a servant. And while I run a strict house, I cannot stop my staff from speaking to one another. The mother of the heir should never be seen doing a task beneath her. It will sully your son’s reputation before he even has the opportunity to grow one. You are to present yourself as Cyrus sees you. As a noble worthy of his favor,” Felix says.

I release a bitter chuckle, mustering strength to taunt this beast.

“And yet I cannot even hold my son for most of the day,” I say.

Now it’s Felix’s turn to laugh.

“Oh, you stupid girl. What did you think would await you when you ran away to give birth to the king’s heir?” he says.

I narrow my gaze, taken aback by his brash comment.

“I did what I had to to survive,” I snap.

“Ah, yes… survival.” Felix’s smile widens. “Did it never cross your mind what your form of survival meant for your son? For his kingdom?”

I once again don’t respond, further irritating Felix.

“Ciel is Cyrus’s legitimate heir. He will inherit the kingdom and its people one day. He has already shown signs of advanced intelligence for his age, proving him a prodigy. It’s unfortunate his early years were spent around you and other lowly humans beneath his station,” he says.

“Being with his mother is not unfortunate,” I say.

Felix angles his head, studying me intensely.

“Are you that dull? Or did you willingly ignore all the signs your son showed you? Beast children develop much faster than human children. He has been able to comprehend everything around him since he was three months old. But I’m sure you never spoke to him during that time. I’m sure you never even showed him the world, keeping him hidden like he was something to be feared. From the moment he was born, he needed another beast to show him the power he was born with and what it means to awaken his own.”

As Felix speaks, I feel myself growing smaller under his gaze, not only because everything he says I was unaware of, but also because I may have harmed my son’s growth without knowing.

“When a beast turns four, its inner beast is awakened—its true form. Dimitri told me you managed to pull it out of Cyrus on the trip back,” he says with a cruel smile, “Was it as terrifying having it unleashed on you as it was for me watching him wipe out an entire army almost singlehandedly?”

I shudder at what Felix’s words entail.

“Especially with Ciel being the son of Cyrus, he would have killed you and everyone else on that godforsaken continent. Being with his mother is the most unfortunate thing that could have happened to him,” Felix says.

I let my frustration fuel me as I speak.

“But he isn’t a full beast. He is half! My blood runs through his veins, too,” I growl out, desperate to prove to the beast who hates me the most that I deserve to be acknowledged as his mother.

Felix only studies me, however. And I can tell by the way his jaw is working he’s livid.

“That means nothing, human.”

Felix, as it turns out, was coming to get me because it was time for me to spend time with Ciel. But as I walk through the large walls of his estate, I feel a sense of loss. Every beast that speaks of Ciel says the same thing. I know nothing about them; therefore, I am not fit to raise him. Tears of frustration burn my eyes. I knew none of the things Felix or Cyrus told me, making me believe them.

My mind shifts to the moment Cyrus lost his temper in his tent. He was terrifying as he wrestled for control of himself, his humanlike form wavering in place of his anger.

Will Ciel also be capable of that? Is that what he will eventually become?

I lean against the wall, a crushing weight on my chest as I try and force air into my lungs. I can’t help but wonder if I am truly not what’s best for my son. He is not fully human. He is half beast. And I know nothing about that half, something that I can’t even try to hide from him. I planned on raising him to never know of his father. He wasn’t even going to know what a beast was. But if what both his father and Felix say is true, he would have been different regardless.

“Annalise!”

I look up at the sound of my name, my stomach twisting in discomfort when I see the beast approaching me. It’s the beast who spoke to me just last week, Danielle. A smile rests on her lips as she approaches, seeming genuine in her excitement to have run into me.

Her smile drops as she studies me, noticing my mood.

“You look flustered,” she says.

I break her gaze, looking away.

“I’m just tired, is all,” I say softly.

She chuckles, stepping around me.

“Having doubts about being a mother to a beast?” she asks.

I look up at her in shock.

“How—”

“The General speaks very lowly of you,” she chuckles, “I figured he would let his hatred slip in your presence.”

I take in the beast in front of me in confusion. For a servant, she seems to know a lot about Dimitri and Felix. She also seems a bit too carefree for this place.

“Who are you, exactly?” I ask.

“I’m Danielle—”

“No, I mean… who are you to Felix and Dimitri?” I ask in a shaky whisper.

Her carefree features slowly dissipate as she studies me with a blank expression. Just when I think she’s going to walk away, her smile widens again, and she shocks me by hooking my arm in hers and holding me close.

“Would you like to see him?” she asks.

“Who?” I ask.

“Dimitri of course, he’s doing much better now. You should at least visit him,” she says.

I shake my head in shock as fear hits me.

“What? No, I—”

“Think he’s a traitor? A disgusting beast?” she says, eyeing me.

My eyes widen, and I try and pull my arm from her grasp, but she holds me tight.

“You don’t want to see the beast who sacrificed his body so that you could see your son again? You’re crueler than Dimitri let on,” she says, pouting.

I open my mouth, but nothing comes out.

Sacrificed?

“Come, I’m sure it will lift his spirits to see you,” she says.

Danielle drags me through the estate, and none of the servants seem to care. If anything, they go out of their way to avoid eye contact. She takes me to the wing that Felix resides in. I’ve never been this way, nor do I want to. I begin struggling, but her grip tightens around my arm the closer we get through the halls.

She pauses in front of a large double door, and I feel panic wash over me as I take in the guards standing in front. Their gazes shift to Danielle and me, but she’s the one who speaks.

“Don’t worry, I have the General’s permission.” The lie falls off her tongue easily. But the beasts guarding the doors believe her, meaning she is someone close to Dimitri in some capacity.

The guards open the doors, allowing us inside. The bedroom is large and elegant, and the drapes have been pulled back to allow the natural light to cover the room.

My eyes widen when I look towards the bed, tears burning my eyes.

“Dimitri?” I whisper.

Danielle finally releases me, allowing me to approach his bedside. He looks awful. His left eye is still swollen, and his body is covered in bandages that blood continues to stain. Someone beast him— no, someone whipped him.

My eyes shift to the visible bruises along his torso, my heart dipping as I take in a marking that looks similar to mine on his ribs. The symbol itself is a different shape from Cyrus’s, more than likely specific to Felix. I let my tears fall as I slowly kneel next to Dimitri, my guilt eating me alive. His chest slowly rises and falls in his deep slumber.

“What happened to him?” I whisper, my hand gently caressing his cheek.

“The king offered him anything he wanted as a reward for bringing back you and the heir. Instead of asking for what he deserved, he asked that you be able to see your son. The king obliged, but not without consequence. Felix beat him within an inch of his life that day, refusing to heal him,” Danielle says, kneeling next to me.

I look at her in horror, and to my shock, there are tears in her eyes as well as she looks at Dimitri.

“I don’t know what spell you put on the beasts in your life. But Dimitri has always taken the worst punishments for you without hesitation. He has always pushed himself to the breaking point for you. So for you to say the things to him that you did after all he’s dealt with for you is just unfair and undeserving. Especially when he is the reason you can hold your son again,” she says.

Danielle shifts, perking up slightly. A small smile forms on her lips as she looks down on Dimitri.

“Right on time,” she murmurs.

“Danielle!”

We both tense as the sound of Felix’s uncontrolled anger booms up the hallway.

Cyrus

The palace feels strange now that I’ve returned without my son and his mother. Ciel should be here, learning of his birthright and place among beasts. But because of his mother, he will be unsure of his place among both beasts and humans. He will see them as equals when they are not, and that makes me angry all over again.

“No,” I say aloud, handing off another list filled with potential candidates for marriage.

My advisors have long been pestering me about marriage and producing an heir ever since the war ended, and my father was killed unexpectedly by humans, who we never knew to be capable of such damage.

My father had arranged the marriage between Marzia and I before he left for battle. But I have been unable to fulfill that engagement, as Marzia doomed herself and her family to banishment. My engagement officially crumbled once the war ended. When I was finally able to bury my father, her presence wasn’t one of comfort. And she wasn’t smart enough to understand her place. She thought that since Annalise was gone, she could weasel her way back into my good graces. But she only sealed her fate.

Marzia could never compare to Annalise. Nor can any of the women who have been offered for marriage. I once again feel the burning pit of hatred for myself as I think of it more clearly now. Annalise isn’t a beast. I’m not even sure she’s fully human after learning of the hunter’s methods to further themselves in the war. And yet, her intelligence is something I’ve come to admire about her. And her beauty is something that brought a king to his knees.

As my servants take away the list of candidates, my eyes drift to the opened letter on my desk. It’s the reason I left the estate to tend to the duties I put off in going to retrieve Annalise. It’s also why the pressure to choose a queen has suddenly increased. I silently lift it, rereading its contents.

We may not have noticed any beasts while we were over there, but they somehow noticed us. And this letter confirms the existence of another monarchy with a king at its helm.