Page 39 of Wrath Of Suns And Shadows (The Osparia #2)

“What do you want?” he asked, but there wasn’t any malice in his voice, only pain.

I walked over to him so he could see my hands, but they didn’t move.

I was lost for words. I refused to be like everyone else and tell him it would all be okay.

It was nothing but empty promises, those closest to him grappling for words to say to him in his grief.

I knew it wasn’t all okay, and I had learned long ago that grief, fucking grief, always stayed with you in some small way.

The load never got lighter. We only got used to carrying its weight.

I had no empty promises for him. I refused to be like those that would tell him that everything would be okay.

“I’m here.” I signed, and I saw his expression twist with raw emotion as he grabbed my shoulder and pulled me into a hug. After a long moment, he pulled back and signed. Part of me wondered if it was because he knew that if he spoke, he would fall apart.

“I’m sorry for the beach . . . for everything . . . ,” he signed, and I wagged my head.

“Nothing to be sorry for. Getting my ass beat occasionally keeps me humble,” I responded, and he let out a chuckle as he leaned back in his chair, his wings lazily draped over the back of it. “I should be the one apologizing to you . . . ,” I signed, and he shook his head.

“No, the only one at fault here is Valla and she will fall. I don’t know when, but I have faith in what we’ve built here over the years,” he said, and he nodded to the other chair in the room.

I grabbed it and sat down with him at the table as he poured me a drink.

I took it down in one swig, and he chuckled as he poured my glass again.

“At least we can both agree on keeping a glass full,” he remarked, and I clinked my glass against his. I heard the shuffle of feet as someone else walked in. I didn’t have to turn around to know who it was: Luana. I wasn’t sure if I could face more than one of my demons tonight.

“I came to check on you,” she said to Sedrin, and I took down my glass again and sat it on the table. This was going to be a long night.

Luana was followed by Nevara and Taryn a few minutes later. We had all put on our nicer clothes for tonight’s get-together, but judging by where we’d all ended up, it seemed like we would rather drink and reminisce on simpler times. And that was exactly what we did.

Within a few hours, we had all drunk way too much and played one too many games of Tile.

Luana’s hand had brushed mine a few times as we’d gone to fill our tankards.

Our lingering glances hadn’t done us any favors.

I didn’t know how to approach her after my outburst on the beach, and with so many emotions warring inside me, I decided it was best to bid everyone farewell as I got to my feet and called it a night.

I began walking the worn path home, thinking about how different things were only a short time ago.

I missed my time in Woodhaven with Luana.

Everything had been easier between us. But now, since the rebellion was on high alert, and with Maeve passing and Emelyn gone, she was all I thought about during my days.

The woman infiltrated my every thought. She had become an addiction I couldn’t shake, not like I wanted to.

I lived and drowned in all the things I felt for her. But I knew she needed time, and I also knew I’d wait until the end of it for her.

A twig snapped. It brought me out of my thoughts, and when I glanced over my shoulder, the woman herself was walking down the worn path after me. She paused when my eyes met hers for the briefest moment before she closed the rest of the distance between us.

“Could I join you on your walk?” Luana asked with her hands, and when I looked around, I realized I had wandered beyond the tents while lost in my thoughts.

“Of course,” I signed, and she shifted on her feet as we both leisurely strolled next to one another. Our hands barely a whisper from the other. The silence wasn’t awkward, like I’d been expecting it to be after our last encounter.

“Luana, I’m sorry about everything that happened on the beach.”

“No need to apologize. I think everyone’s emotions have been high lately.

We’ve all just needed a little time.” She paused her words and then paused her steps a moment later and grabbed my hand, causing me to stop.

I glanced down at the touch and wanted to ingrain the feel of her smooth palm into my memory.

“I just want you to know that I’m here. I’m not your enemy, Ace. You don’t have to avoid me. I-I don’t want you to avoid me.” Her voice grew smaller with her admittance. A small smile curled at the edges of my lips but then fell away because I hadn’t wanted to hurt her feelings.

“Luana, if I hurt you, I—”

“No, you were giving me exactly what I asked for . . . but maybe we could go about it differently.”

“What do you mean?” I asked as I ever so slightly tightened my fingers around her hand still in mine. Never wanting her to let go.

“I want to be around you. I crave your presence, but maybe we could take things slowly . . . ,” she said, and her light brown skin flushed pink.

“Slowly?” I signed, quirking a brow as I turned, and now we stood face-to-face.

She reached just below my chest. I was worried she could hear my heart pounding behind it.

I moved my fingers so they interlocked with hers, and she didn’t flinch away from the touch.

After a moment, she gently tucked her fingers around mine.

“Is this okay?” I signed with my free hand, and she nodded, smiling up at me, and the sight made warmth coat my skin.

“This is perfect,” she said as we both turned and walked hand in hand through the woods.

I wasn’t sure how long we were out there, only enjoying each other’s company, but when we stopped, it was in front of her tent.

I released her hand and was about to turn away when she reached up and palmed my cheek.

My brow furrowed with emotion as I placed my hand over hers and savored the warmth of her touch.

I titled my head so I could kiss the inside of her palm, looking at her and watching for any signs of discomfort but seeing none.

“Thank you . . . ,” she murmured, and I admired the small smile she gave me before I released her hand from mine and turned away and took off into the skies to clear my mind and calm my racing heart.