Page 34 of Wicked Lies Grow Wildflowers

CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX

XANDER

When Maeren went inside, I circled her block before parking in a shadowed portion of the street.

I’ve been doing this often, coming by at night and just sitting, watching.

I’ve never stopped since the first night we met.

It brings me comfort to be close to her, even like this.

Some nights I’m here for just a little while, and some nights I spend hours looking for a flutter of a curtain, a light to flip on, just like I did that first fateful night.

I’m not fully psychotic though, I am working while I sit out here. I can also lie and say I get great cell service in this particular spot, the best in town, to justify this sick behavior.

Maybe I am sick and she’s my affliction.

She’s all I fucking want. All I can think about.

Any amount of time I spend with her will never be enough.

I could have eternity by her side and it wouldn’t sate my need for her, my desire to have all of her.

Maeren did something to my brain the first time her eyes met mine and I’ll never be the same.

She’s my obsession and I refuse to ever give her up.

And if I ever have to then I might as well be dead.

If she ever walked away from me I don’t think I could survive it. I need her like I need air.

When her name flashed across my phone screen earlier this evening, I was busy on my burner with potential leads for The Skinner and I immediately dropped that call.

Nothing is as important to me. Nothing can consume me quite like her.

I might have to do some explaining later, make up a reason for my hasty hang up, but I don’t give a flying fuck.

Maeren needed me, and sure it could have waited ten minutes, or she could’ve gotten help from Sage, but I wanted to be the one to take care of her.

I want her to know that I’m always there for her.

That I’d do anything for her at the drop of a hat.

She’s only been in my life for two months but I think I’d sell my soul to the devil himself if she asked me to.

A glance at the clock in my car shows it’s half past nine now, and I decide to head home for the night.

She’s in bed now anyways, confirmed by a goodnight text she sent me ten minutes ago.

She didn’t need to tell me that though, I’ve sat out here enough to know her whole schedule from sunrise to sunset.

Pulling away from the curb, I give her window one last glance and breathe out a sigh of relief, knowing she’s safe and sound, curled up in her bed. The only thing that would make me happier is if I was curled around her, or better yet inside of her.