Page 36

W e were weary from the battle—our bodies tired and sore.

It took us almost three days’ time to make it back to the seaside cabin that was Amiyah’s family home.

It wasn’t until the sound of crashing waves met my ears that I let my body relax once more.

I hadn’t realized how tense I had been on the journey back, as if my body were a taut bow string.

I cracked my neck, stretching the tension out of my limbs.

I was happy to have the grimoire safely back in my possession, the cabin remaining unchanged since we left. It was handy to have a safe house this far from the cities of Istmere, in the far reaches of the mountains and shore.

Nobody would ever find us here.

We discussed how long to stay, but Zion and Annelise were anxious to get back to Siraleth and re-ward the cottage.

To return to the library that held the most useful information for us.

We would need to hone our battle strategies, call on the remainder of the resistance to join us, then march against Donika in the coming weeks.

The time for battle had come.

But as we made preparations, I needed to study the Kotova grimoire. To memorize as many spells as I could to use against Donika when I faced her. We knew more about the Noctani now, and we would know even more once Nikolai was ready to talk.

When we had returned to Amiyah’s, Nikolai had retreated even more.

He spent his days by the shore, his feet buried in the sand.

He wasn’t ready to talk yet, and I wasn’t sure if he was going to be ready any time soon.

He was more withdrawn and distant than I ever expected, but Zion and Annelise were firm with me that I needed to give him time.

Instead, I should focus my energy on battle strategies.

We would need to be sharp heading into the final battle, and should her army get the better of us… we needed to be ready.

I needed to train my magic now that it was bound once more, but I had no other Stormshade to train with other than my mother, now that Isaac was gone. Zion noted a few that he knew of in the resistance, but I didn’t know them personally. They were perfect strangers.

I knew I could trust them, but training with them simply didn’t feel right.

Tess and Puck had offered to train with me, though their knowledge of my magic was limited.

In the end, I knew I would have to rely on Annelise.

She was a practiced Stormshade, her magic having been bound since long before I was even born.

She and Zion had bound themselves to each other early on, Annelise never having to fear the repercussions of her unruly and unpredictable magic.

She was a formidable Stormshade in her own right, and I knew I could trust her to take over Isaac’s training. Our relationship was still strained, but I hoped this would bring us closer together. Give us more time to bond.

When we decided to leave for the cottage underground the following morning, Annelise said there was one thing left to do before she joined us.

When we set out towards Siraleth, she left us in Prins, on the north side of The Shadow.

She promised she wouldn’t be more than a half a day’s time ahead of us, and that she would help us secure the wards when she returned if need be.

I was confident we could manage the spell without her. Amiyah had decided to join us, leaving behind her peaceful cabin for the first time in centuries and vowing not to return until we had put an end to this conflict.

By the time we had passed the two pillars reaching up into the sky signaling our entrance into Siraleth, the fact that Nikolai and I hadn’t had a true conversation was threatening to drive me out of my mind.

Tess could sense my frustration, and along with Saanvi and Kenna, they did their best to distract me on the journey back.

The grimoire was safely tucked in my pack, and I could sense its gentle hum as we neared the cottage underground.

Despite this being the site of our last battle against Donika and her men, this appeared to be where the grimoire was most at home.

Even if Donika knew we were here, we weren’t fools enough to fall into another of her traps this time.

When we finally made it to the cottage, we paused outside, leaving our packs by the door and standing in the center of the cobbled road.

We joined hands, magic pulsing between the eight of us, easily reinforcing the wards so that neither Donika nor any of her men would be granted entrance.

When we did march to battle, we would meet the resistance on the plains of Siraleth, not here at the cottage.

This safe house was only for us.

It had begun to feel as if a home before Donika had used Warrick to lure us out.

I hoped it would feel that way once more when we were settled.

I took the same bedroom I had last time, right across from Nik.

We had taken to sharing a room before he had been turned, but when we had completed the ward spell and returned downstairs, he slipped behind the heavy wooden door of his own bedroom. Disappearing without a word.

My heart dropped, fear settling deep in my gut.

I wasn’t sure he was ready for what was going to come next.

He was strong, but turning into Noctani had left him broken.

He reminded me of how I had been when I had finally escaped the Stormvault, except the anger hadn’t hit him yet.

It was all despair… threatening to drown him.

I left him alone as the others had suggested and returned to the library, needing to brush up on the war council and Kotova spells.

I was determined for the grimoire to become a part of me in these next few weeks leading up to our stand against The Stone City.

I wanted its spells to live within me, always at the tips of my fingers.

They were some of the most powerful spells in the realm, and it had been my family that had created them.

Passed them down from generation to generation.

I wondered how many of them my mother had used before as I ran my hand across the tattered pages of the grimoire in the library, the afternoon sun peering in from the windows located high above.

The shelves alongside me were brimming with brown, worn books.

The heavy wooden door of the library opening startled me and I jumped, casting a gaze over my shoulder to determine it was only Tess.

I had been a little on edge since getting back.

She moved to the center table to join me, pushing the books out of the way so she could perch on the end of the table.

“Haven’t seen you since we returned to Siraleth. I wanted to check in on how you’re doing.” Her smile flashed her pearly white teeth.

“It should be me checking in on you ,” I reminded her, closing the grimoire with a thud. “I wasn’t the one that was almost strangled to death by a Noctani in battle.”

Tess waved her hand in the air as if it were nothing.

I bit my lip, my gaze focused on the closed grimoire before meeting her gaze once more. “I don’t know what I would have done if I lost you.”

She took my hand from the table, clasping it in hers. “You didn’t lose me.”

I shook my head. “But I almost did. If it weren’t for Puck… ”

“Diana… ” her tone was uncharacteristically stern. Tess was always light, even when the situation didn’t call for it. “Pl ease tell me you aren’t blaming yourself for what happened in the clearing.”

I wished I could tell her that. Everything falling apart…

everything that had happened… I couldn’t help but think things would have been different if it weren’t for my actions.

I was so hell bent on saving Nikolai that we lost Isaac and many other Shades from the resistance in the process. We almost lost Tess, too.

I opened my mouth to speak but Tess cut me off. “This isn’t your fault, you can’t think that for a single second. I can hold my own, you don’t need to be watching my back all the time. You were focused on the mission, as you should be.”

My gaze fell from hers. “But what if Annelise was right? What if I was willing to sacrifice too much to save Nikolai? What if it wasn’t even what he wanted? Everything is all fucked up.”

My breath blew out on a heavy sigh. I tilted my head back towards the library ceiling, my eyes tracing the architecture within the wood as I bit back tears that stung the back of my eyes.

“You can’t think like that.” Tess shook her head at me, but I could only see her out of my periphery. “None of this is your fault. Of course we were going to do whatever it takes to save Nikolai. Not just for you, but for all of us.”

I pushed back in my chair, glancing at her once more. Her amber eyes held immense sympathy within their depths. So much compassion. I hit the lottery when I met Tess, and I couldn’t help but think I didn’t deserve her sometimes. She was the best friend anyone could ask for .

I stood, grasping her shoulder and embracing her. She let out a deep sigh against my shoulder. “I know it isn’t my fault, but that irrational part of me simply won’t be quiet.”

She pushed me away, a twinkle of mischief in her eyes. “Sounds like you need something to get your mind off it. Sounds like you need an adventure .”

I breathless laugh escaped me. “I’m not sure I could handle any more adventures at the moment. I’ve got my hands full… I think I’ve had enough excitement for this month. Or for a lifetime, really.”

I collapsed back into the chair.

“Well once you’re up to it, I say we explore Siraleth a little. There’s so much here we haven’t seen. This was the capitol city once, before the war. I’m sure there’s lots to find. I’m dying to see the old ports.”

A soft smile graced my lips. “I would like that very much. Once things are a little quieter.”

“I’m not sure they will be until we kill this bitch,” she replied, tossing her chocolaty straight hair over her shoulder.