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M y eyes were darting back and forth, my mind racing. This must have been what Alastir meant when he said he wasn’t even sure the Shade would survive it. I had a million questions running through my head, but we couldn’t risk going back to find Alastir again.

My gaze met Tess’s.

“This is the only way?” My voice was thin.

Tess nodded solemnly. “Alastir confirmed it. The only way to cure this type of spell is with an equally dark and bloody one.” She nodded towards the antidote before Puck. “This spell contains your blood. That is enough for the two antidotes we have. There is no other way.”

This… changed things.

I had expected another pit to form in my gut, but my heart had simply stopped entirely, suspended within my chest. If we didn’t succeed, if we didn’t cure Nikolai, he would be dead. There would be no going back.

I pushed back from my chair, my hands on the table as I stood. My gaze traveled to Zion.

“What do we do?” My voice was quivering.

I wished more than anything Isaac was here to guide us. He was my mentor, and he knew more about this type of magic than any of us… except for maybe Annelise. My gaze flitted to hers and she nodded.

“I’ve had the Kotova grimoire in my possession for decades, and I trust Alastir with my life.

If he says this is the only way to reverse the siphoning spell, it is the only way.

” Her hands were neatly folded in her lap as she spoke, but my gaze snagged on her finger, picking the skin off her thumb with anxiety.

Like mother like daughter.

“Then we need to test it on someone else first,” I offered, my gaze drifting around the table.

It was Saanvi who spoke. “The ingredients required for the spell aren’t commonplace, one of which being your blood . We have two antidotes in our possession, and it might take days if not weeks to create more. Do we even have that much time?”

Zion nodded at her in agreement. “We don’t, not the way Donika’s numbers are escalating.

Our spies confirmed that her numbers have tripled, quadrupled, even since the beginning of this war.

If we wait much longer, we risk her creating so many Araneoch and Noctani we have no hope of standing against them.

We can’t continue to let her grow her forces. We need to act. ”

“Then we move against her now,” Kenna suggested.

My eyes met hers as I settled back into my seat, my hand splayed across my chest. My heart was still beating and I could feel the steady rhythm beneath my palm.

“And when we kill her, we have no idea if her Noctani will continue to live or if they will die with her,” Tess countered with a shake of her head.

“The dark magic and the blood she used to create them resides within her. If she dies, there is a possibility that they may return to their natural states… or to the earth from which they came. But there is also a possibility that they will die, corrupted by the spell that turned them. We have no way of knowing. If we move now, Nikolai could end up dead, anyway.”

I nodded, my eyes darting to each of them. “That’s not a risk I’m willing to take.”

When Annelise spoke next her voice was cold, brittle. “Is that what Nik would have wanted? Risking the lives of the entire resistance—and the fate of Istmere—just to save him?”

My gaze was cutting when it met hers. Zion’s hand gripped my knee, keeping me in my chair as my magic surged forth, pressing against my fingertips so fiercely I singed the wood table, leaving behind ten fingerprint marks. I pulled my hands back hastily, burying them in my lap.

I swallowed hard. “Nik would have wanted to see this through. And are you forgetting, Mother, that if he dies, so do I? Who will take the throne then?” My voice dripped acid.

“Will it be you? Was the whole point of this not to reinstate the rightful heir to the throne? Istmere will descend into chaos without a succession in place. If Donika dies and so do her Noctani , then so do I . The fact that Nikolai and I still live serves as proof that even if the magic has been twisted and darkened, we are still bound .”

“I’m sorry for suggesting it,” Annelise put her hand out, pleading. “That isn’t what I meant. Only that we are losing focus. The greater threat is the war against Donika, not the Noctani alone.”

“And we will resume our plans to march against The Stone City once we have cured Nikolai and Isaac and have them safely by our sides, marching with us.” My eyes narrowed on Annelise.

“Let’s not forget I can’t march against Donika with my magic unbound.

I do not plan to march against her with strength and numbers alone.

We need Nikolai so that my magic can be used in the fight to come. ”

I could see that she regretting having spoken, risking shattering the gentle peace we had achieved upon my return. I understood her reasoning, but there was nothing left to discuss. We needed my magic bound, and we needed Nikolai.

That was my first priority.

“So we have to risk it, then. Trust Alastir. That the antidote will work and we will restore him. We only have two in our possession, and we need to use them wisely.” Puck’s voice was gentle, bringing the conversation back to what our next steps would be.

I closed my eyes, letting the sound of the crashing waves waft over me. I inhaled deeply through my nostrils, allowing the smells of salt and brine to center me. I nodded, my gaze finding Puck’s when I opened my eyes once more .

“Yes. We will have to take the risk that Alastir is the most seasoned magic wielder in this realm, and if there is any chance of saving Nikolai, it rests with him. I have to be the one to do it.” I bit my lip, my gaze falling to the table.

“Diana, no,” Zion protested, his chair pushing back in the sand as he gripped the sides of the table, knuckles white. “You cannot be the one to wield the blade. If it doesn’t work and we lose him?” He shook his head. “You would essentially have killed yourself.”

Annelise nodded in agreement. “I have to agree. If there is any life after this one… you can’t carry that burden with you. I don’t think it’s a wise choice, Diana.”

It was Saanvi who cleared her throat and spoke, silencing all of us.

“In fact… it has to be Diana. When Alastir finished the spell and gave it to us, he was certain to tell us that it had to be the blood of the antidote that wielded the weapon. Diana’s blood was used to create it, therefore Diana must wield the blade. ”

I took a deep breath, exhaling through my nose.

It was settled, then.

I would either cure Nik, or kill him… there was no other choice.

Whatever happened next, it would change everything. I would either have Nikolai back in my arms, my magic bound, or he would be dead, and our chances of defeating Donika diminished.

“Now the question is, how do we find them?” Zion asked, settling back down into his chair .

“I don’t think I can find the house he kept me in again,” I replied, shaking my head. “I think our best bet at finding them is to lure them out.”

“And how will we do that?” Kenna asked.

“I’ll be the bait,” I replied, my jaw tight.

He would come for me—I knew he would. He couldn’t stop himself. Not only did he lose me for himself, but he disobeyed Donika’s direct orders. He wouldn’t let me get away a second time.

“Then we move in force,” Zion said with a nod. “We will call on more resistance members. We need to have numbers to match theirs, at the least. We have no clue how many they will have with them, but we need to be a small enough group to not draw notice as we travel.”

I nodded. “And what will we do with the other Noctani? They are innocent, too. Most of them, anyway. Donika made them what they were without their consent.”

“I’m afraid they may be a casualty of war,” Annelise answered.

Leave it to her to speak the cold truth. My gaze fell to my hand where I picked at the nail on my own thumb.

“I hate to agree, but she’s right,” Saanvi said. “We can try to spare them, but there will be casualties as we try to administer the antidote to Nikolai and Isaac.”

“We have to try to keep Isaac safe and busy until Diana can cure Nikolai, then Isaac next. She is the only one that can cure them both with her being the only one to wield the weapon,” Kenna added.

“Keeping them busy without killing them will be a task in and of itself. We can’t save them all, Diana. ”

The way I saw it, they were still my people.

They were still innocent residents of Istmere, fallen victim to Donika’s ministrations and experiments.

They were no more at fault than we were.

It felt wrong to cure Nikolai and Isaac because of our personal relationships with them but sacrifice the others for our greater purpose.

Zion could see the emotions warring on my face and his hand found my shoulder, squeezing it. His hazel eyes were soft as they held my gaze.

“Being queen means making the hard decisions. We cannot win this war without Nikolai the way things stand right now. We will try to fight them off, but our mission is to keep Nikolai and Isaac safe until you can administer the antidote to both of them. You aren’t alone, we will be there with you.”

I nodded, my breath catching in my throat. I knew he was right, but that didn’t make it any easier.

“How many will we take with us?” I asked.

“I will send a raven to Prins. Should five on top of the seven we have here be enough?” Zion asked.

Amiyah had been quiet the entire time, letting us hash out the next steps ourselves and not interjecting. But she spoke now, her voice cutting. “If you think you are marching without me, you are mistaken.”

The ghost of a smile crossed Zion’s face, and he nodded. “Eight, then. An additional five should be plenty.”

When I smiled at Amiyah, her eyes sparked with emotion.

The fact that she would march with us, even after what had happened to her son Tyr, had gratefulness swelling deep within my chest. We were stronger together, and I was confident the group of us would be able to hold the Noctani off long enough to see this through.

We only had to pray to the Mother that there would be no Araneoch.

“It’s settled then,” Zion pushed away from the table. “I’ll send the message. We march to Akra to lure them out the morning after next.”

“Why not tomorrow?” I asked.

“You’ve only just gotten back. You need your rest, Diana. The trials to come will be a strain for us all.” He gave my shoulder one final squeeze before retreating to the cabin.

“How can we be sure Isaac will be with them?” Kenna asked. “He wasn’t with the group that captured you and held you hostage.”

I nodded. I had been thinking the same thing. “We can only hope that he is. If he isn’t with them, we will cross that bridge when we come to it.”

Isaac was a father to Kenna, and I was equally anxious to ensure his safety.

“It’s settled then,” Tess said, a hopeful half smile gracing her lips.

Nothing had gone to plan as of late, and I was anxious to get this over with. I was glad Tess still had hope… but at this point… I wasn’t sure.

We would need more than luck to get through this.

We would need one hell of a fucking miracle.