Page 7 of Wedding Cake Carnage
Lily nods. “I’ll close up the bakery tonight. You just get some rest. With Everett missing and now a body, I can’t imagine what else can go wrong for you.”
And like a curse from the universe, a pair of familiar blondes pop up before us. Britney Fox, Noah’s legal plus one—and Cormack Featherby, the girl who is convinced she’s his current fiancée.
Cormack found the engagement ring Noah bought for me in his closet last month and has taken the liberty to wear it herself. Noah tried to explain that it wasn’t meant for her, but she thought he was being coy and has outright refused to take off that chunky rock that was meant for my finger.
But, as it stands, last month Everett’s mother shoved her own mother’s wedding ring onto my finger—and in fear of losing it, it’s been warming my hand ever since.
For whatever reason, Everett thought it was a good idea to fool his mother and sister into thinking we were engaged, and we’ve gone along with the farce ever since.
“Noah, I believe this is your department,” I say as I hand Britney a slice of chocolate fudge cake, and she gladly accepts. The scent of vanilla and cocoa permeates the air between us, and it’s intoxicating. Britney owns an entire slew of Swift Cycle gyms. She’s even planted one across the street from my bakery. And once her classes are over, she sends all of her clients my way as a means to cleverly replenish their calories. It’s a system that works for both of us.
Britney is a sassy, sexy character who has that whole Jessica Rabbit sultry vibe down to a science. Hair covering one eye, full lips, va-va-voom figure—check, check, and check.
“Thanks, Lou Lou,” Brit says as she takes a quick bite out of the decadent cake.
Another thing that both Britney and Cormack have going is the inability to keep my name straight. But I’ve long since stopped correcting them.
Britney boot scoots her way to the nearest detective. “Noah, just the husband I was hoping to see. Now that our counseling is over, I think we should have dinner to discuss our future.”
“Great.” Noah’s dimples ignite, but he’s not smiling at her. “I’ll be at the B&B tomorrow night, and we can do just that.” In another odd twist of fate, both Britney and Cormack are staying at my mother’s B&B.
My mouth opens and closes. “Noah, I thought you were having dinner with me? Trust me, I’ll need you and all the high-powered weapons you can bring to protect Harry Nash from my fury. It’s best I leave my weapon at home for the reunion.”
“Ooh, I am.” He winces at his wife.
“Not a problem.” Britney scoops up another slice of chocolate fudge cake. “I’ll simply crash the party. We’re all one big happy family—right, Leslie?”
“Right.” In the grand scheme of things, I’d much rather listen to Britney and Noah hash out the details of their divorce than meet another branch of my twisted family tree.
“I’ll be there, too.” Cormack is quick to tack on an invite of her own. “I wouldn’t miss it for the world.” She slaps Lily’s hand from the pink champagne cake as she snatches up another piece. “I’ve got so many great ideas for our wedding, Big Boss. Just you wait until we pour over all this material.” She holds up a Louis Vuitton tote bag bursting at the seams with all the giveaway goodies from the expo. “So many great ideas, so little time! I’ll never be able to settle on just one theme. We might just have to get marriedtwice. Ta-ta!” She scampers off with Britney, and I shake my head at the sight.
“How in the world did you get into that mess?” I can’t help but ask the question.
Noah takes a deep breath and scratches the back of his head. “I ask myself that every day, Lottie. Every darn day.” He starts in on loading up the trolley, and a sparkle of quivering light catches my eye from the next booth over. I don’t hesitate heading in that direction, and sure enough there’s a tiger the size of a casket slinking my way.
“Hey,” I hiss over at him as I bend over. I’m terrified, but considering he’s dead, I think I’ve got something going for me. “Here kitty, kitty.” A spike of perspiration bites under my arms as the enormous creature strides forward.
His shoulders hike up and down with his every move. He’s got a mean sour puss look on his face, but he doesn’t take those steely blue eyes off me. And sadly, those blue eyes remind me all the more of my own sour puss, Everett. Suffice it to say, Judge Baxter could be as ornery as the next judge, if not more so. In fact, that’s how I met Everett. I was a defendant in his courtroom, and he wisely saw the light and sided with yours truly.
“Hey, sweet cat,” I whisper as my voice trembles. “Do you have a name?” I do my best to scan its neck for a collar. I really don’t know if you’d leash a large cat like this. In the least, I’m pretty sure a cage would be in order. When Dutch, the golden retriever that I fell madly in love with came back last December, he still had his dog tag on.
The feisty feline gets within a foot of my face and I stop breathing altogether. My God, its head is twice as big as mine. I don’t care if it has sailed over the rainbow bridge, it’s menacing to a fault and I’m certain I’m going to have nightmares for the rest of my natural life.
“Rawr!” he bellows so loud every muscle in my body freezes as the vibrations of his voice pass through me like a tuning fork. “Hello, Lottie,” he thunders out the words and I gasp.
And just like that, my powers sprint in the most verbose direction of them all.
“You can talk?” I breathe a sigh of relief. “That’s fantastic. Because you are going to tell me everything.”
His lips curl slowly as if he were smiling, and in a spasm of light he up and disappears.
Jana March’s murder investigation just got a whole lot more interesting.
And then an idea hits me.
I’m going to employ every ghost I know to help me find Everett. I don’t care how many supernatural laws we’ll be breaking.
Rules were meant to be broken.