Page 58 of Violent Little Thing

Epilogue I

DELILAH

ONE YEAR LATER

“ A nd you still feel like building a relationship with Elodie is a positive addition to your life?”

The stress ball in my hand regains its shape as I exhale, nodding. My therapist inclines her head, so I elaborate.

“Yeah.” I close my fist around the ball again. “Took a while to get there but I like the friendship we’re building.”

If I could accidentally fall in love with my kidnapper, I could build a relationship with the woman who birthed me.

I don’t know if I’ll ever call her mom, but for now, having her in my life at all is a gift.

“She understands my boundaries and never tries to push me past what I’m comfortable with. It’s…nice.”

Dr. Grace’s face blooms in a smile. “Delilah, that’s great to hear. You’ve come so far since you showed up in my waiting room a year ago.”

She’s right.

A year ago, my entire identity was survival.

Even after admitting I fell in love with Adonis and accepting that I wanted a life with him.

Every time something triggered me, I went into survival mode.

Adonis was patient, he always is, but it took a toll on me.

Knowing that even with my father dead and my brother shut out of my life, I still had to deal with the aftermath of those twenty-five years, not just pretend they didn’t happen.

I was desperate the first time I sat on this couch. I wanted to feel normal. Or as close to normal as I could feel after everything.

If that was ever going to happen, I had to learn who I was. Without the built-in armor and without feeling like I needed to escape from my own mind.

After six months of intense talk therapy and coming to her twice a week, Dr. Grace introduced me to EMDR therapy.

A few sessions in and I was working through memories I thought would be locked forever.

Contrary to what I believed, there was no distinct moment when all my stolen memories came back to me. Dr. Grace made sure I knew that may never happen. What I got instead was a slow untangling of my present emotions and how they connected to what happened in my past.

“Last month, when we talked, you said you were exploring different hobbies to see if anything gripped you. How’s that going?”

“Good,” I say, grinning.

“You just lit up,” she replies, intrigue entering her eyes. “Tell me more about that. ”

“I’ve been sticking to my spin classes at the gym. And Indigo found an animal shelter for us to volunteer at.” My smile broadens. “We go on Tuesdays and Thursdays.”

“And what’s it like to experience these things just for fun?”

“Eye-opening.”

“Hmm.” She jots down a note. “And why is that?”

“Because for so long, I thought because I wasn’t in the pursuit of a job or career that I was aimless and wouldn’t get a chance to do things I enjoyed without expectations.

” I speak around the lump in my throat. “I thought I would aways be trying to cover lost ground and prove I’m somebody worth respecting. But I don’t have to. I can just be.”

“That’s big, Delilah. I love the way you phrased that.” Her pen flies across the notepad. “How has it been managing your symptoms since you started a new AED?”

I bite down on my lip. “Mostly, I was anxious about the adjustment period. I didn’t want to trigger a breakthrough seizure or prove that I have grand mal seizures now and just didn’t know it.”

My voice is calm now, but I spent two weeks not being able to think about anything but that after my neurologist told me he was switching my prescription to try and reduce the long-term side effects.

“And how was that transition?”

“So far, so good.”

We talk a few more minutes before she clasps her hands in her lap. “We have about fifteen minutes left, would you like to do some EMDR to wrap up?”

“Yes.”

“Okay, let’s use the headphones today.”

Titus is the first thing my eyes land on when I step on the plane. He waits patiently for me to reach the leather seat beside him and melts into me when I hug him. “Hey, old man.”

Behind us, Adonis greets the flight attendant.

The only thing he told me when he picked me up from therapy with bags in the backseat was that he was taking me on a trip.

The first time he did that, we ended up in first class on a commercial flight headed to Switzerland.

The time after, he flew us private to Chicago because I said I wanted to visit the Art Institute.

Mexico and Iceland got checked off my bucket list in similar fashion.

Any off-handed comment I make turns into a trip, a gift, an experience.

One thing I’ve learned about Adonis is that his love language is spoiling me.

He sits down in the seat facing me, his shades resting precariously on the bridge of his nose. A moment later, Titus hops down from his chair to place his head in his owner’s lap.

Without looking up from his phone screen, Adonis uses his free hand to find the space on top of Titus’ head just between his ears. He scratches until the old dog shows his thanks, turning his head to cover his palm in kisses.

So damn cute.

Finally, I can say without a doubt that I love my life. And I didn’t know that was an option. But here I am. In love with every single aspect and excited instead of dreading what comes next. Adonis gives me everything without me having to ask for it.

The only thing I truly wanted, the only thing I’ve asked him for, was the guarantee that Weston wouldn’t show up and derail my life again. A year post-rehab and that hasn’t happened. I don’t even know if he’s in Wildwood .

I never told Adonis I planned to kill him. Never told him that meeting Elodie derailed those plans and kept my hands clean when I was willing to risk my freedom to teach him a lesson. Weston is no longer my business.

His karma is whatever life he’s living. I just hope it’s a long , miserable life.

My future kids will never know him. Victor, Silas and Alonzo will be the only uncles they need.

Once I take this IUD out, that is. Twenty-seven still seems too young to be somebody’s mama. Ms. Agnes and Elodie both say that if the right time exists, I’ll know it. And if I never do, that’s okay too.

Interrupting my thoughts, the flight attendant appears with warm towels for both of us. When Adonis is done cleaning his hands with it, he pockets his phone and holds his hand out to me, inviting me to sit in his lap until takeoff.

“What’s the occasion?” I ask quietly.

“We haven’t had a trip yet this month.” He hides his face in my neck. “Wanted to fix that.”

“The month just started.” The words fade into laughter when the ticklish stubble of his beard grazes the column of my neck.

“It’s the last few weeks of summer, that deserves a trip.”

“Where are we going?”

“You’ll see when we get there.” His hand lowers to my hip. “You got me missing work again. My employees love you.”

Snickering, I shift on his lap.

“Are you proud of becoming my weakness?”

“Yes.” I bend down to kiss the corner of his mouth. “Your life was boring before me.”

“Calm,” he corrects. “But there’s nothing I would change. I’ll take a lifetime of your violent ass over calm any day.”

He kisses me before I can agree. I moan against his mouth when his tongue swipes my bottom lip. “Love you,” I breathe.

“Love you more, menace.”

That’s all I need to hear before contentment crowds in my chest. I’d take a lifetime of anything with him because it’s him .