Page 63 of Upon Buried Embers (Upon Buried Embers #1)

Alara

Wearing a black dress, I walk out of the tent and meet Tofa. She’s wearing something similar, although hers dips lower at the chest than mine, but both come to our knees.

“Ready?” she asks, linking her arm with mine.

“As I’ll ever be,” I mutter. “And it’s in the center of the camp?”

“Yeah, we all get together in the middle, around a big bonfire.” I nod, and join the end of the line where others are walking down. “So, Alara ,” she teases, and I grin at her. “How does it feel to have a name?”

I look up at the twinkling sky and smile. “Like it’s a dream.”

“Then keep dreaming.”

The smell of freshly cooked meats fills the air and the chatter gets louder the closer we get. The fire can be seen illuminating the sky as dragons fly above, their large bodies twirling and dipping, almost like they too are having their own tradition.

“Over there!” Tofa says, and I look to where she points at Rohan, sitting on one of the many log benches that have been placed around. He’s in deep conversation with Kaldar and Dorkin. Their heads bent together, but his eyes flick to me and he freezes.

I wipe my hands down the dress self-consciously, nerves setting in. Does he like me in it? He picked it out himself.

I look around at others, at Tofa, and though I’m not as skinny as I was, I’m not filled out like them, and my chest is nowhere near as big.

I frown and look down, sighing.

“What’s wrong?” Tofa asks, but I shake my head. She goes to speak again but something catches her eye.

Calian is staring back at her, his drink half way to his mouth. The desire is clear in his eyes, but surprisingly, Tofa turns away. “I’ll catch up with you later.” She walks away, but not to Calian, she goes to Beau who is talking with another man.

I look between them, Tofa acting nonchalant and Calian’s jaw twitching with how hard he’s grinding his teeth.

“Why are you frowning?” I jolt at the deep voice and look at Rohan as he approaches.

“Nothing.” I smile, but I’m hesitant.

He tilts his head, staring me down. “Words.”

“Just… do I look okay? I don’t want to embarrass you.”

His brows furrow. “Do you look okay?” he says slowly, and I nod.

“Little Whisperer, if you weren’t so shy, and I wasn’t so—” he eyes me up and down.

“Possessive. You would be laid out before the fire and screaming to the Gods while I embarrass myself from coming too soon.” I blush, and he leans close, lips inches from mine.

“You’re beautiful,” he says softly, taking my single braid that he did in his hand and playing with it.

“You are the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. ”

“Thank you,” I whisper, looking down and biting my lips, trying not to smile.

“You have no idea what you do to me, do you, Alara?” He pulls me closer, placing my hand against his chest. “Feel that?”

I do. His heart is beating so fast.

“This is what happens to me every time I set eyes on you. I feel like it’ll rip free from me and burst. It doesn’t do that for anyone else. It never has.”

“Rohan.”

“I once told you that you have to be strong, that I refused for you to make me look weak, to embarrass me.” He places his forehead against mine.

“But in the end, Little Whisperer, it’s me who is weak.

Just one look from you and it could have me doing anything.

So do not think you are below anyone here.

” He brings the back of my hand to his lips. “You are all I see.”

“You are all I see, too,” I say, emotions welling up inside of me.

“Then look.” I do.

His eyes shine with possessiveness but also affection, and I dare to think that maybe they show something deeper.

“Understand now?”

I nod.

“Here.” Rohan turns, grabbing something and then he’s back, placing a rose into my hair, just above my ear. “Perfect.”

My heart takes flight. How did I end up here, feeling so…happy.

I rise on my tiptoes and place a kiss to his cheek.

“Come.” He grabs my hand and leads me to a log where we sit.

I’m handed a drink. It smells fruity, and I take a little sip and hum.

“Good?” he asks.

“Good.” I take another drink.

“Don’t drink it too fast,” he chuckles.

“Why?”

He eyes me. “You’ll soon find out.”

We watch others dance around the fire, twirling and laughing. Someone somewhere has an instrument. I don’t know what it is, but I start humming along to it. I’m three drinks in before I know it, and Rohan chuckles as I sway from side to side.

“Go and join her,” he points at Tofa.

I look at her dancing with Beau. “But don’t let the stable boy touch you.”

I eye him, and a playful smile spreads across my lips.

“Don’t you—”

But I’m already up and heading over to them.

“Alara!” Tofa squeals, dragging me to them and we form our own little circle as we spin around, dancing.

I’m dancing!

I copy Tofa as she throws her hands up, spinning on my toes. When Beau grabs my hand and twirls me, I hear a growl I know all too well and peek over at Rohan.

He rests his elbows on his knees, head low but his eyes are solely focused on me, flickering where they reflect the flames.

He raises a challenging brow, and with the drink flowing through me, I spin again in Beau’s arms, tempting the beast. It’s playful, rewarding, because I have an idea of what is to come from me testing him.

“Why do I feel like I’m going to die tonight?” Beau groans, and I laugh, spinning with Tofa as she giggles.

“You won’t.”

“The Dragonbond looks like he’ll set me on fire.”

Tofa hugs me from behind as we rock side to side. “Just hide with the horses, Alara will keep him busy.”

“Tofa!” My cheeks blaze and she cackles.

“I feel dizzy,” I groan, slouching against Rohan as he holds me close.

“Ready for bed?” I nod, breathing in his scent. “Up you go.”

He lifts me easily, and I wrap my legs around him, leaning into his shoulder, my lips at his neck.

I hum, squeezing him tightly and he chuckles at my neediness. I’m not even ashamed.

I have felt his eyes on me all night. Searing. Burning, and I can’t wait to finally taste him. Will he let me?

My body rocks gently, the laughter and music fading as Rohan takes us back to his cabin.

“I enjoyed tonight,” I say. “It was fun,” I hiccup.

“You did, hmm?” he rumbles, squeezing my ass and I giggle, rubbing my nose against his throat.

“I did. The Masters held parties, I guess you could call them that. But they were full of cruel laughter and ended in screams.”

I sigh, and I feel him stiffen, but I’m too dizzy to mind it.

“The screams would go on behind curtains or closed doors, but you could always hear them. Some male, some female. At first I used to wonder why. I was so stupid.” I laugh at myself. “So, so stupid because I thought it was a game they were playing. But then I found out.”

I feel him looking down at me.

“They brought a woman to the center of the room and they just… took turns with her,” I slur, ignoring his growl.

“How can...” I hiccup. “How can someone do that to another? I was so scared, Rohan. The threat that I was going to be like her was always hanging over my head. I remember her begging, crying and then she laid there when they were done. Lifeless, eyes blank.”

“Alara…”

“Buuut,” I yawn. “I managed to evade that and just get beat a lot. Broke a little. I should be thankful, right? That I only got smacked about, or tied up in the barn and left for days. Or even caned. That was a favorite of Master’s, or breaking my bones.

He broke my leg once and left me dangling there until my shoulders dislocated.

” He tenses. “I don’t remember him putting them back.

I blacked out but woke up to him kicking me in my stomach as Effy put a wooden plank on my leg to keep it straight.

He used to punch me every day because I couldn’t walk with my broken leg and it was my fault for angering him.

But, why should I be sad about that when I wasn’t raped?

How can I be sad or scared when others went through that? ”

“Abuse is abuse. They’re all painful,” he says gently.

“But they went through so much worse. I can’t imagine anyone doing that to me, Rohan. I only ever want you.”

“That doesn’t take away your own pain of what you went through.”

“Do I deserve to laugh like I did tonight?”

“Everyone deserves to laugh, Little Whisperer.”

“Hmm. They have it allll wrong about the Dragorie.”

“Who does?”

“Everyone. I’ve seen more cruelty within the city walls than I ever have here.”

“Don’t get it wrong Alara, we can be cruel when we need to be.”

“Exactly,” I yawn. “When you need to be, not just because you find it fun.”

“You’ll see just how barbaric we are in The Games, but remember it’s your life or theirs, okay? We have no friends in The Games. Remember days like this here.”

I go quiet at that.

My eyes droop, and I hear the door being opened before I’m laid down on a bed of furs. Rohan’s scent wraps around me, and I turn on my side, snuggling into it.

“Wait,” I suddenly sit up, or at least try to, but the room spins. “I want to taste you.”

“What?”

I try to go for Rohan’s pants and he chuckles, placing his hand over mine.

“I want to taste you Rohan. I touched you, now I want to taste. Here.” I press my hand to his hardening cock. Hmm. So big. “Can I? Please?”

He groans, but it’s like he’s in pain. “In the morning, Alara, you drank too much. Don’t beg me like that.”

“I’m fiiine.”

He chuckles, laying me gently back down.

“Your words are important to me, but your mind needs to be clear for anything like that.” He places a kiss on my forehead. “Sleep, tomorrow we prepare to leave.”

“Okay,” I yawn. Rohan goes to leave, but I grab his hand. “Where are you going?”

“I need to talk to Dorkin, he received a letter.”

“The Games?”

“I don’t know yet, he said it was urgent.”

“And you’ll be back?” I peek an eye open, feeling my hair on his wrists, and I smile.

He kept it on.

“Of course.”

“Will you keep me?”

“I’ll always keep you.” A pause. “No matter what. You’ll always be mine, and I’ll always be yours.”

I hum. That’s nice.

“I liked this party,” I murmur. “I didn’t end up hurt, and you were there.” I force my eyes open. “You make it all better, so come back to me, soon?”

The backs of his fingers run down my cheek as sleep begins to take me, and I’m not sure if I heard correctly or if I’m dreaming. But I’m sure I hear him say in a rough voice, “You make it all better too.”