Page 42 of Upon Buried Embers (Upon Buried Embers #1)

Elf

Sleep slowly releases me as warmth touches my face. Liquid hits my tongue next, soft breaths against my skin follow, and I automatically swallow, then I cough.

“Easy, steady.” I swallow again, a palm rubbing at my chest until my cough resides.

My throat feels like glass, and my head feels stuffy, but I slowly peel my eyes open.

My vision is blurry at first, but as it clears, I’m pinned by dark eyes that I didn’t expect to see again.

I gasp, scrambling to sit up, only to cry out when pain shoots through my wrist.

“Careful,” Rohan says, gently taking my wrist and bringing it up to his mouth, resting it there. “You need to watch your wrist, and take it slow, your fever just broke.”

I blink away sleep, confusion settling in me.

Fever?

The braid, roses, Rohan angry, running in snow, Rhett and Darcia…

Cold, so cold, and then my wrist…

I start to tremble, tears filling my eyes.

Have I been brought back for punishment?

“I’m… I’m sor…sorry,” I manage to gasp out, unable to hold in my sobs.

“Fuck.” He gently climbs into the bed, wrapping an arm around me and holding me against him, my face in the crook of his neck. “Shh, it isn’t your fault.”

“I… I made you m… mad.” He holds me closer, mindful of my wrist as his hand comes up to the back of my head.

“It’s alright. Don’t cry, fuck, just, don’t cry.”

“I can’t do any… anything right,” I gasp for breath, my whole body aching.

I’m always doing something wrong.

Always getting it wrong .

“That’s not true, hush now, calm down.”

Everything I’ve been feeling over the last few days pours out of me. I’m unable to stop it. Unable to stop the hurt and confusion and upset at how Rohan has been with me, and how he shouted at me, telling me to leave.

I never thought I would be here again.

“It wasn’t your fault,” he says, mumbling other things I can’t make out. I cry into his neck, only to have another coughing fit.

Rohan leaves me to grab some water, then he holds the cup steady against my lips, watching intently while I take a drink.

When I’m done, he wipes away my tears with his thumbs. I can’t look him in the eyes, but I feel him watching me.

When he’s done, he takes my wrist in his hand again.

I look around the room, seeing bandages, empty bowls and wet cloths as the fire roars.

How long was I asleep for?

“I never wanted you to leave,” Rohan says quietly after a long moment.

I look at him. He’s frowning at my wrist, his thumb rubbing over it gently.

“I thought you would maybe go to the dragons, or the stables.” He takes a breath.

“I didn’t want you to be on the receiving end of my anger when I knew deep down you didn’t really understand what you had done. ”

I didn’t understand what I’d done wrong.

When I say nothing, Rohan’s eyes flick up to me, the purple more prominent.

“I never meant for you to leave the camp, especially at night, especially in a storm.” His jaw tics, and he slowly shakes his head.

“And I absolutely didn’t mean for you to get hurt.

” He looks back down at my wrist and brings it up to his mouth again. “Forgive me.”

“What?” I croak. I couldn’t have heard him right.

“Forgive me.” He repeats, his other hand cupping my cheek before he leans forward and rests his head against mine. “Forgive me for telling you to leave, for shouting at you, for getting you hurt.”

“I… I don’t understand,” I say slowly.

He leans back, tilting his head.

“I did something wrong to you, I’m trying to apologize.” He pauses and looks around the room before his eyes come back to me. “Am I doing it right?”

We stare at each other, at a loss for words because I have no idea how someone is meant to apologize to me. Hasn’t he said sorry to another before?

“Am I… awake?”

“Yes. You woke a few times but you weren’t with it, the fever had taken hold of you.” He checks my head. “You’re still a little warm but not burning up.”

“But…” I rub at my chest and he eyes the movement.

“I… no one has ever said sorry to me before,” I admit quietly.

“I made you mad, I should say sorry. I did something, and I washed the…” I cough.

“And then I tried to...” Cough . “Tried to make—” Rohan places his finger against my lips, and my eyes widen.

“Quiet,” he says, voice full of command. “You need more rest, don’t speak. Understand?” I nod. “Lay down.” I do. “Close your eyes, I’ll be here.”

He brings my wrist up to his mouth again, and as I watch him watching me, my eyes slowly drift closed.

But I notice how bruised his knuckles are.

“I brought you some bread,” Nora says, as she places a basket down on the table beside the bed. “Melle chose it.”

“I—thank you,” I mutter, unsure what to say.

There is a stilted silence, until she finally breaks it.

“Melle wanted to come, but she’s learning about hunting today.”

I nod.

She sighs.

“I’m sorry,” she blurts out. “For hitting you.”

“Okay,” I reply, unsure how else to.

“I wanted to come sooner but, I honestly didn’t know how to say it. I… I know you didn’t hurt Melle.”

“I wouldn’t.”

“I know.” More silence. “I best get on.”

With a nod, she leaves without another word, and a warm feeling fills my chest as I look at the basket.

I fall back asleep, voices reaching me but not able to wake me, but when I do finally open my eyes, I spot roses on the table and my heart aches.

Rohan.

I get out of bed and go to them, grabbing one and bringing it briefly up to my nose.

He must have been back since I slept.

Smiling gently, I head for the bath.

Rohan will shout at me for going on my own, but he went out when Nora came.

I heard him telling her not to upset me though, and the deep warning in his tone made me shiver.

Walking slowly to the bath, I strip and get in, loving how the heat instantly surrounds my aching body.

“Are you okay?”

I nearly jump at the sound of Rohan’s voice, not expecting him back so quickly.

“I’m fine,” I tell Rohan, humming with pleasure at finally bathing. Rohan hovers at the curtain, hands on his hips but he doesn’t come in.

It’s been three days since I woke up and I’m still confused, but Rohan said we’ll talk when I’m better.

I do feel better now, but he’s been hovering like I’m on my deathbed.

I look down at my bruised body and wince. Rohan hasn’t said anything about it, so maybe he didn’t see it? Maybe I can pretend what Darcia did to me didn’t happen when they fade.

Just like Master’s faded.

He also hasn’t said anything about Rhett or Darcia, and just thinking about them and what they did has my stomach turning.

I roll over in the bath, breathing against the tub wall and squeeze my eyes shut.

Rohan’s being so nice to me, and it feels like another trick. Once I’m fully recovered that’s when my punishment will start.

For the order I disobeyed.

“You have soap?” Rohan’s voice pulls me out of my thoughts.

I look at the huge bundle of soap on the table beside the tub. “Yes, there are so many,” I tell him like he didn’t put them there.

“I wanted you to have more options. They’re all rose scented.”

They are?

“Thank you,” I croak out, clearing my throat.

He grunts.

“Did Nora upset you?”

“No, she apologized.”

“Good.”

Silence follows, and I can feel the tension coming from him.

“Are you sure you’re feeling up to it?”

“I’m fine.”

I’m surprised he hasn’t just barged in here, but he’s letting me have privacy for once and it’s strange…

I clean myself up slowly, washing away the fever I had for four days, according to Asseya when she checked up on me yesterday.

She told me Rohan helped me through it, never once leaving my side. How she guided him on how to look after me, because he has never looked after anyone before.

I felt rotten being sick, but when she told me that, a swarm of butterflies took flight in my stomach.

The Dragonbond looking after a lowly slave.

My hand goes to my collar and I sigh. I wish I could take it off.

“Why are you sighing like that?” Rohan demands, and I look toward the curtain, seeing he has his back to me.

“Like what?”

“Like you’re sad.”

I am sad.

So very sad.

But he doesn’t need to care about that.

No one ever cares about that.

“I’m going to get out now.”

The curtain opens suddenly, and Rohan storms in, a large towel in hand.

“Rohan!” I gasp, making sure the water covers me.

“Here,” he says, holding it up for me to get into.

I hesitate for a moment, but as he stares at me, never once dropping his eyes, I rise, and he wraps the towel around me. He lifts me out of the tub before gently placing me on the ground.

He rubs at my skin softly beneath the material, mindful of my wrist, never once taking his eyes off of my face.

Does he see the bruising? How ugly my body is?

I bet he doesn’t want me in his bed now.

He pulls a tunic over my head next, the towel dropping as he pulls it over my body.

I’m barely dry, but at least I have fresh clothes on.

Still, no mention of the bruises.

By the time I take another breath, he’s moving my hair out of my face and grabbing my chin with busted up knuckles. I still don’t know why they look like that.

He brings my eyes to his, with a deep look I don’t understand as he gently prods my healing split lip.

I see it then, fury, like a fiery tornado coming and going before he seems to blink it away.

“Just one thing, Little Whisperer, always find one thing.” My eyes sting at his words, remembering how he said them to me the first time.

I nod.

“Come, then,” he whispers, “We need to braid your hair.”

I start to walk, but he gently halts me. “Get on.”

“What?” He nods to his feet and I sigh.

“I feel better, Rohan, I promise.”

“I can’t pick you up, so this is the next best thing.”

“Rohan…”

He stares at me, and I shake my head.

I place my hands on his arms, feeling the ribbon, and then step on to his feet.

It’s ridiculous how easily I can do it, I’m tiny compared to him, but he wraps his arms around my back and begins to walk.